


Under the Moonlight

by Song_Apart



Category: Rising of the Shield Hero
Genre: Action, Blood and Violence, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:20:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 65,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21632077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Song_Apart/pseuds/Song_Apart
Summary: Raphtalia and Naofumi work on their new life within the village, work to be done and a new beginning. But Raphtalia can’t focus on all that alone being conflicted with her feelings for her Master Naofumi.
Relationships: Iwatani Naofumi/Raphtalia
Comments: 34
Kudos: 99





	1. A New Adventure

_Two weeks, it had only been two weeks since this amazing adventure started._

_I simply can't describe it as anything but an adventure…_

_The day Naofumi showed this to me still replays itself in my mind, the sea salt breeze, the way he spoke with such fervent finality._

_But regardless, here we were, working and living, building a home from a childhood memory._

_It was like he breathed life into the idea of this once desolate place, so many bad memories now healing with the help of my Master._

_It was almost too good to be true._

_If this is a dream… I don't want to wake up._

"Raphtalia!"

As if I summoned him, there he was, calling my name through the burlap doorway.

I must have been daydreaming in bed because when I twisted myself from the covers of my stiff cot I felt incredibly groggy. My feet struggled to find stability on the earthen flooring of my current quarters, quickly rubbing the sleep from my eyes and idly draping my fingers through my hair. I cut across the floor, stopping just shy of the exit of my tent. My current living arrangements since I volunteered to stay in temporary housing until more of the village was restored.

Breathing in I reached out to pull the tent flap open, allowing morning sunlight to flood in.

Then cutting into the light was the shape of Naofumi, his signature green darkening in the shade, the outline of him cast in golden sunlight.

_Wow_

I looked up to him as the last of the drowsiness drained from my face.

"I've let you sleep for long enough, we have another full day."

He spoke in his usual curt manner, that tone still accompanied by his gentle eyes. His mannerisms at this point only elicited a low smirk from me, my left hand rested along the coarse fabric of the tent, fingers softly drumming themselves as we spoke.

"Morning patrol followed by breakfast then.."

"Actually, there were some new arrivals last night, we are going to process them before breakfast." My fingers cease against the fabric.

"Do we have the space?"

"We can discuss that during processing Raphtalia…"

The way he said that… I nodded firmly up at him and averted my gaze momentarily before replying.

"Let me get dressed and we'll be on our way."

Naofumi gave a small nod in return as I let the tent flap fall back into place. The dark returns as the morning light was cut off, save for a tiny strip of space from where the flap ended up. A golden strip of light lying upon the floor as I drew away from the front of the tent and back to my cot and personal belongings. The space was a bit larger than needed, and without Filo it was almost too much.

Naofumi had insisted that I have my own space, but honestly I only accepted it on the condition that it was one of the temporary shelters. Sat on the edge of the main town much like Naofumi, who also has his own space.

_I wonder…_

My thoughts drifted for only a moment before I came back to reality, and with a shake of my head I would begin my routine.

Before too long I let the flap fall behind me, my boots crunching gently onto the gravel path, turning on my heel to tug close that tiny crack in the tent front that always seemed to hang open to spite me. Facing forward and quietly I once again took in the morning breeze, it's familiar air carrying a somewhat calming energy.

But something hung under everything, an unshakable presence, at least to me.

Before me sat the entirety of the village, old ruined homes sitting on the outskirts with progressively rebuilt structures further in. The church being one of the first structures completed then steadily the rest of the town, starting with housing. Using Master's mercantile connections, resources such as stone and lumber were shipped consistently. As a result construction hardly ever had to be halted due to shortage.

The early morning was quiet, usually Naofumi and myself were the early risers and it just so happened to be the only time we were alone together. So without needing to say so, this time was precious to me. But today we had company, small groups of disheveled individuals wandered the streets, I assumed these were the new arrivals Naofumi spoke of.

There were many more than I had imagined at first, I figured he wasn't exaggerating when he implied we wouldn't have the space just yet. Still, it was a shock to me for how many more people appeared overnight. I idly thought there would have to be inquiries into why so many came here.

_Refugees._

_Or Assassins…_

Naofumi was standing a respectful distance away from my tent along the gravel path. He seemed lost, a faraway expression sitting on his stoic face. I walked up to his right side, boots crunching against the gravel slightly tilting my head to peer at him.

"Master Naofumi?"

I said gently, watching him blink suddenly and huff in surprise.

_Checking stats maybe?_

"Oh, sorry."

He reached up and gently squeezed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. His eyes shutting tightly, my own gaze quickly scanning over his look. He hadn't been sleeping well lately, and the exhaustion was palpable from him. Releasing a gentle sigh he let his hand rest back at his side, looking down at me with an awkward look on his face.

I met that awkwardness with a cheery smile.

"Ready Raphtalia?"

He asked, tone and look slipping back into his usual attitude. I nodded in return but I wasn't keen on letting it go just yet, my pause seemed to be more potent because Naofumi noticed almost instantly. The hesitation must be uncharacteristic in his eyes.

"What's on your mind?" I questioned, making him pause, a poignant lapse in conversation that gave way to needless speculation. Was he _finally_ going to share his thoughts with me? He parted his lips to speak and I felt my ears pop up in anticipation, my tail going quite rigid in my state.

"Nothing you need to be concerned about." He dryly replied, moving to cross his arms over his torso. My ears flattened in response, letting a soft huff of defeat escape my lips before my hand came to idly palm the hilt of my sword. Tail going limp as the tension of my excitement faded whilst another hopeful moment fell quite short. With my free hand I gestured the way for him to lead but puzzlingly he shook his head.

"You lead today Raphtalia."

My eyes widened and I would nod soberly at his words, feeling a bit surprised.

"As you command Master Naofumi."

I would take the lead, hearing Master's firm steps behind me as I would take us on the regular patrol route. Not knowing his intent at having me lead.

Today was different, the same warm sun and sea salt breeze sat on everything with an unmistakable nostalgia. But it was difficult to separate the other feelings floating under the surface. As we walked the streets that unnamed sensation became increasingly clear.

_Dread._

It stunk in the air, the faces of many of the newcomers ladened with it, not to mention the exhaustion that sunk in their features. How long had it been since they slept? A surprising majority of them were Demi-humans just like myself, and their appearance was an all too familiar sight for me. Anytime their eyes gazed up to me I would return it with a warm smile, but more often than not their eyes would slink down to the ground as they meandered on with their morning.

_Just where did they come from?_

_What happened?_

I found myself questioning, as my footsteps took us from one end of the town to the other.

Perhaps I already knew the answer to those questions. Now taking a left so we could circle the perimeter, making note of the many fresh footsteps that dragged themselves in. Noting internally that there were many more new arrivals than the one's wandering the streets. We continued on like this for a few more minutes, my footsteps feeling heavier than before and the warm isolation of my tent felt faraway.

"Master Naofumi…" I said as we left earshot of any nearby refugees, walking along the burned out husks of the furthest outskirt buildings.

"Yes Raphtalia?"

"How many more…" I spoke, the words escaping me so softly as emotions bubbled up within me. But that just led to me suppressing them in a bid to keep nervous inflections from tainting my speech.

_I had to be strong._

With that thought I turned heel to face Naofumi, who had stopped walking along after my question, his face stoic but I could see the slight pull on the corner of his lips.

"Almost double what you've seen on the streets." My heart sunk even further, slightly adjusting my stance against the ground.

"Children?" I said.

"No more than 7, their families are with them." He replied, a feeling of relief that we wouldn't have to establish an orphanage so early on.

"But, after processing I'm hoping we can set up more temporary housing." His right hand followed to the beat of his sentence, ending his minor explanation by idly adjusting his shield. "More than a few of us can volunteer their interior quarters for our new arrivals."

I gave him a puzzled look at that and Naofumi hushed himself. Reaching up to clear his throat into his hand before he continued speaking. "Of course only volunteers, though I may make Filo give up her room." I chuckled at that, his caring nature shining through, tugging rapidly at my heartstrings. My stomach fluttering at his intention.

"I'm sure we'll have our volunteers Master Naofumi, and Filo will love it if it means she gets new friends." I let a smile form on my face, giving my Master a pleased look as we spoke.

"Yeah, with Mel off to the kingdom she has been a bit down."

I nodded at his sentiment before my gaze shifted to the side. My mind creates a couple of ideas in my head, quietly nagging at the back of my thoughts. This moment quietly faded as the ideas developed into a chilling theory.

_How many people are already aware of our existence?_

_What were they running from?_

_How many were enemies in disguise?_

Master Naofumi, although finally recognized for his numerous heroic actions, still had many enemies littering the kingdom. How many of them had ways and the manpower to strike at Naofumi, in his fledgling land nonetheless.

_I have to remain vigilant, for Master Naofumi._

"Raphtalia?"

Suddenly I felt the warmth of Naofumi's hand on my shoulder and I jumped. The hair on my neck was standing in attention, but his sudden touch only served to heighten my senses. My eyes widened in shock before a flush burned across my cheek, my eyes flicking up to look at him before drifting away. I must've looked deep in thought.

"S-sorry Master Naofumi"

My head fell to look away from him so he couldn't see my expression. His hand pulling away from me, the heat from his touch lingering for moments before the soft inhale of air marked the beginning of his speech.

"What were you thinking about Raphtalia?" I parted my lips to speak but suddenly felt hesitation, momentary, but it was still there. So he was just bound to notice it.

_Why?_

"I'm just thinking of the security risks, with so many new arrivals…"

He listened, with his expression still.

"We don't have the manpower to combat any serious threat yet, or keep any attempt on your life at bay." He chuckles, and my face comes to look up at him, a flash of anger shooting through me before I caught his smile. It was rare enough to stop me in my tracks.

"Listen to you… you're starting to sound like me. No matter what comes I have all the protection I need." He spoke calmly, did he not understand the risks this poses? Almost assuredly that wasn't the case, Naofumi was never one to shrug precautions.

"But Master!"

I furrow my expression into a hard one, interjecting but he simply continues past it, my outburst sharp in the morning air.

"I have you…"

I feel an electrifying tingle ride it's way up from my tail to the nape of my neck. My whole person softened as my weight started gingerly shifting from one side to the other.

_M-me!?_

"...and my shield."

The brief moment of intensity subsides.

_Oh, of course._

I quietly cleared my throat before continuing.

"Regardless, Master we still have the townspeople to consider."

"They are the townsfolk Raphtalia… all of them, sure they can't all be totally good people but each and every one of them came here in the hope for a better life." I found myself at a loss for words, Naofumi, trusting strangers. Then myself being aggressive to the idea of new people, when did this shift occur.

"They need all of us to be willing to accept them into our safe haven, if we hope to stand a chance against any threat that comes our way." He shifted himself so he faced off towards the sea, his soft green eyes gleaming a bit in the soft morning light.

"You of all people know what a catastrophe takes from everyday people." That would've stung me at any other time, but now it only made me feel guilt for my paranoia. "They're looking for a new life, much like the one you have now, to fight side by side against the evil of this world." His dark hair framing him in such a way, his speech firm but laced with hope and pride strangely enough.

A true picture of a hero.

_My hero._

"You understand Raphtalia, but this place is something that needs to happen." I could feel nothing but insurmountable joy at his words, with time he grew warmer to the idea of people. Perhaps this situation wasn't ideal, maybe there would be mistakes to come, but I had the feeling any hurdle could be overcome if Naofumi only continued along this path.

"Then it will happen Master Naofumi, for everyone and for you!"

I said definitively, smiling broadly up at him as he turned to face me, my bright mood suddenly dampening at his look. A quiet cold sat in his eyes, a look that set an uncomfortable chill in my nerves. I'm suddenly aware of the tiny space that sat between us, not noticing myself as I moved closer to him unconsciously. I would cross my arms around my midsection and drag myself back.

_Had I said something wrong._

_Something that upset him?_

He faced away again, but this time he moved towards the sight of the sea. The wind kicking up and pulling at his green robe, the signature piece of clothing flapping in the wind. Much to the same effect as the flag that was raised over the village.

I would follow a respectful distance away from him as he pondered things that weighed on him so heavily, he moved onward, drawing us both closer and closer to the sounds of rushing waves. A bird call echoed once before I grew bold enough to come up to his side again, my curious eyes taking in his side profile as the salt laden air whipped his hair back.

"Raphtalia this place is for all of _you_." I was taken aback by the bluntness, before my expression hardened again.

"Master you'd better not talk about leaving again!" I said harshly, having had this exchange once was all I was willing to put into this matter.

"No… I won't." He said softly, the air pulling those quiet words away and If not for my sensitive hearing it would have been lost.

"Then what… what are we talking about?" I asked.

"Raphtalia… I have something I need to talk about with you… will you listen?"

I pause, something about the way he spoke made it sound like something I did not want to hear. But I cannot simply ignore his thoughts when he so willingly appealed to expose his deeper monologue.

"Of course."

But he paused now, his eyes shifting to the earth before looking back to the ocean view.

"I want you to start taking more of a leadership role around here." That made me confused, honestly it really sent fear through me bundled firmly with frustration.

"I can't replace you." I replied instantly, my left hand gripping around the pommel of my sword, only getting his gentle smile as he looked to me.

"That's not what i'm asking you to do." He crossed his arms, turning his body so he faced me entirely. The wind was dying down just enough so it didn't sing in my ear.

"Okay then, as long as that's clear… should we get back to patrol?" He looked back at the horizon, the smile that sat on his face suddenly seemed sad.

"Yeah."

With that he turned swiftly back towards the village, looking to me. It took me longer than I care to admit for me to realize he was waiting on me to continue leading.

"Right…"

I said softly, looking back towards the village myself, my feet following suit and heading back.

Naofumi's momentary pause sitting at the back of my mind, wondering if he was hiding something from me. Well, he does hide things from me, but something lingered about what he wanted to talk about. I had this feeling that there was still so much to be said. But there wasn't time to consider it now.

The day had proceeded without anything noteworthy. Aside from the influx of people, patrolling was relatively the same. Before long we were all set up with tables and lists near the center of town, having anyone free from manual labor assisting in inducting our new additions. I was sitting near the beginning of the table with an assisting group of four, all armed with ledgers, taking down names and professions. Not to mention reasons for coming here.

"Now, reason for immigration?"

The man looked at me quizzically and I could sense the question on his lips.

"It means; reason for you coming here."

He nodded in understanding and moved to speak, his voice hoarse and appearance haggard.

But his eyes were quick, and his hands were marked with years of experience.

"My village was destroyed during the last wave, me and my brother were on the trail for a while until…" He stopped, his eyes averted themselves for a moment, lips parted but no words slipped out. I saw the familiar grief in his eyes and leaned forward towards him, speaking softly but with a smile on my face.

"It's okay, this place will be your home now." He blinked once and nodded somberly, the gleam of tears in his eyes as he quickly blinked them away. What more could I offer those in mourning? Quiet offers of unity to placate those on the brink, this place was their last hope. Breathing in shakily he continued.

"Anyway, I was directed here by a traveling caravan… so I made my way here."

I nodded to him, scribbling down his reason before looking up to him.

"Thank you, there should be food and blankets further down the line."

He nodded and got up from the table, respectfully pushing his chair in as he moved on from my part of the process. We must've been at this for hours because the afternoon sun had started beating down on us all, and at the thought of lunch my stomach growled. The presence of something sneaking around behind me and settling on my left made itself known.

"Raphtaliaaaa!"

I heard it on my left, sighing gently as I turned to look at the young Filolia Queen, who had slumped along the table's edge. Her chin was the only thing propped up on the wooden top, bright golden hair gleaming in the warm light. That signature cowlick being gently shifted by the wind.

"Master said he was too busy to play today… can you play with me?" I chuckle softly and reach over to pat her on the head.

"Ah, I'm busy too Filo, do you not want to go out on the boats today?" She shook her head, knowing she must be dreadfully lonely since Mel left.

"Well… we have lots of new kids with us today… why don't you go see if they would like to play?" Her hands came up to softly grip onto the edge, looking up to me with a somewhat downtrodden look.

"Do… do you think that'd be okay?"

The question puzzled me somewhat but I gave her a firm nod and spoke.

"I mean… they're kids, I'm sure they'd love to have a friend like you."

She lit up at that, her expression turning into her bright signature look.

"You really mean it Raphtalia!?"

She stood up beside me and started bubbling with excitement. I blinked, shifting to look ahead at the dwindling crowd of people still waiting to be processed. Many of the children were first to go through so the young may be attended to. They seemed healthy and sweet enough, but they had this unhappy aura around them. They needed to know they can have a normal, happy life here.

"Yeah."

I said slowly, looking down to her.

"I mean it Filo."

She bounced in place at the affirmation and let out an ecstatic noise, before saying.

"Yay! Okay Raphtalia I'm gonna go play!"

She took off from the table and I suddenly had a thought, sitting up from my chair to call after her.

"Check in with us before lights out tonight Filo!"

She was already a bit away as she called back.

"Okay!"

Then with that she was gone. I slumped back into my chair, hearing my stomach growl hungrily at me, enticing nothing more than a sigh from me. I fell forward onto the table top, crossing my arms around my head.

_I wish I could still play all day._

"Raphtalia?"

My ears perked up and I sat up in my chair, seeing Keel at my side quite suddenly.

Stuck as his young form for now he seemed to be grown mentally. Yet at this moment he had two bowls of freshly made stew at the ready, wooden spoons already sitting within them. Their smell resembled that of Naofumi's cooking, warm memories replaying themselves in the back of my mind as the scent of meat and stewed vegetables caused me to swoon.

_My word, I'm hungry._

"I'd noticed you haven't eaten yet… if you want to take a quick break."

I would reach up and gingerly take one of the bowls from his hand, sighing warmly as the warmth filled my hand. Mouth automatically watering at the prospect of eating but something struck me.

Hungry people.

I had almost set it down on the table without realizing there were so many staring at it. Shaking my head to clear my mind before turning to Keel and putting my bowl back in his hand. He gave me a hurt look but I moved to speak before he got the wrong idea.

"I'll eat after I'm done for the day… please go help pass out food to the newcomers if you wish to help." My words were incredibly gentle, ending it with a tender smile down at my friend who seemed to stiffen at my speech.

"B-But I…" He stuttered.

"Many of these people haven't eaten for days, it wouldn't be right for me to eat in front of them."

I stated simply, to which he reluctantly nodded.

"I'm sorry Raphtalia, I just thought you looked hungry."

I tilted my head and chuckled softly, which confused him even more.

"Well of course I am, but we still have work to do no?" Keel would nod in understanding but before he could leave I would gently pat him on the shoulder.

"After we're all done we'll eat, okay?"

That seemed to cheer him up, but still he remained quiet, slipping behind my chair and down the line of volunteers.

"Ugh…"

I quietly growl to myself as the scent of food slowly faded away, reaching up with my hand to gently massage my forehead.

_Food sounded amazing right now._

But it simply wasn't right to eat while there was still so much to do. Later, I promised myself, hoping lowly that me and Naofumi could go over the extension projects over a warm meal.

More than a half hour had passed after Keel left, the number of refugees needing to be registered dwindled to an acceptable number. But, in some fit of altruism I allowed my helpers to go on their own and allow me to finish up with the last few that remained. Those few seemed to be nervous about the whole thing, they would stall themselves as long as possible. So my efficiency had suffered as a result, and the morning sun had steadily turned into that of the afternoon rays.

I ran a hand up the back of my head, allowing the softness to flitter between my fingertips, the inner part of my well grown hair was extremely warm.

If we were out traveling I'd probably have set a hood over myself to keep the sun from beating down on me. If this registration business wouldn't end soon I might just leave my post to go eat or anything else. The ticking seconds were like daggers in my legs, which itched more and more towards the prospect of leaving.

_How childish am I?_

_What would Naofumi think of this behavior?!_

I sighed softly and leaned over one of the registration sheets I had finished earlier, double-checking and triple-checking their contents. The world felt distant to me at this moment, my adventures with Naofumi a far-cry from my current standing.

What I wouldn't give to be out on the road, fighting besides my Master instead of this.

"You're looking quite productive Raphtalia."

I jumped up in my chair, the voice of Naofumi forcing me to sit straight and respectfully. What a coincidence that i would be thinking of him at the second he found me! I glanced to my left to find him standing there, but how long he had been hovering was a mystery to me. He could be incredibly stealthy when the need arose, how often that need was to startle I had no clue.

"Mm, yes… My group has processed 36 adults and accompanying children, there were 10 seniors among them. Some had herbal experience, but of course anything relevant is in the registry." I laid out what my morning had been, feeling proud of our work, even if it was soul draining.

"I assume you made them feel welcome?"

I blinked, looking over and up to Naofumi, who had this strange look on his face, perhaps a familiar one. What a weird question, the energy around that statement was off putting.

"Uh, yes I believe so."

I nodded firmly, to which he would chuckle, moving around to my right before taking up one of the spare chairs to sit beside me. He was close, which wasn't an unfamiliar concept to me, but I could never ignore his presence.

_I could almost…_

_Focus._

I silenced my wandering brain and cleared my throat, waiting for him to speak.

"Do you want to go over this at dinner?"

He questioned, I took a moment to reply.

"Yes, I think that would be best."

I turned to face him, slightly pushing out my chair so my entire form could look on towards him. Using one of my hands to quickly peel back a strand of rebellious hair as the air took it.

"We can assign work lists appropriate to their skills, and finish up sleeping assignments until more housing becomes available." His green gaze stared over the list, taking in every detail, as was typical of my intelligent Master.

"That sounds fine Raphtalia, speaking of, I was thinking of where to put all of us for the time being." That piqued my interest and I tilted my head a bit in a show of curiosity.

"What were you thinking?" He momentarily chewed on his lip in thought before speaking.

"Well… I hate to put you in this position but since Filo has been insisting on her own space for the time being…" He paused and I sensed that awkwardness from him once more.

"We… if you don't mind, we would have to share a tent for a while."

His eyes glanced up at me to see my reaction but I would quickly face away from him. Feeling a smile creep onto my face, which I quickly forced away but my tail gently wagged at the suggestion. Which I find incredibly more difficult to hide. But I couldn't silence the deafening drum in my chest, the temperature around me becoming several degrees warmer.

_The best possible outcome._

Externally, I had to remain calm, but I knew for a fact a happy blush was on my face.

"Well, if it has to be that way, I'm fine with it." Now it was Naofumi's turn to be puzzled.

"Really?" He said with an amused chuckle in his throat.

"Yes, the space was too large for me anyway, we don't need to waste anything special for me." He scoffed silently at that and looked away from me and out to the holdouts.

"Well I'm glad you're not upset, I promise you the utmost privacy when you need it." He said firmly.

"I'm sorry? Master Naofumi we've shared sleeping arrangements before…"

Naofumi turned to me with a suddenly piqued look on his face, which left me quietly thinking about my phrasing. The silence was palpable, I gulped before looking back to him with a steady look.

"It won't be a problem.." He huffed at that, and his look kept reminding me of something, I couldn't quite place it still. A cross, it seemed, between indifference and concern.

"Raphtalia are you feeling well?" Suddenly Naofumi's hand came up to grasp me at my forehead. Causing me to squeak under my breath.

_What's with this all of a sudden!?_

"I- I am feeling fine Master, why?"

He continued feeling my head, moving it so the back of his palm could test me.

I can't lie to myself, something about the way he did that felt extremely familiar, it was a good feeling but my embarrassment grew even more. Quickly peeling myself away from his firm hand, feeling quite short of breath.

"You looked a little hot, and you feel warm as well." He said with his stern tone.

"You could've asked me…" I say sharply, perhaps being a little standoffish will draw him in.

 _Not that he_ _has_ _to…_

_Focus._

"You know I can tell when you're hiding something from me. Since you're so bad at lying." He said as I tried desperately to regain my composure.

"It's just the heat, and…"

He raised one of his eyebrows before I finished.

"I haven't… eaten yet." Naofumi's eyes widened as he realized he had basically checked me for no reason. Pulling a small distance from me that made me cry internally.

"Then… let's get lunch."

He said gently.

"You sure Master Naofumi? We still have some holdouts to process." I said with an unamused look on my face, an act, to allow me to revel in his embarrassment.

"O-of course! After." I smiled and looked on to the stragglers once more.

"That's fine by me Master Naofumi." It wasn't adventuring, but I could feel the itchiness in my legs slowly ebb away. As long as I was with Master, I think this would be alright.

_A few hours had passed since the registration process ended, Naofumi and I had grabbed something to eat and we were currently drawing up plans for the new tent structures._

_In an effort to cut down on time we would need later, Naofumi and I had begun packing his things in between drafting the plans to move him into my space._

_The entire time I couldn't help but feel giddy, scenarios and fantasy running through my mind at an unbelievable pace._

_I had to admit it was getting harder to flat out ignore them, and I found myself distracted by the sight of my Master more and more. I always had these feelings, but why did they feel amplified lately, maybe it was simply the close nature of building a home together._

_Or was there something mutual I could sense on a deeper level than just surface emotions?_

_Nonsense…_

_Master isn't as weak-willed as me, I needed to concentrate more if I was ever going to return to a manageable state._

"Raphtalia?"

His voice called over to me with a gentle inflection in his tone. Of course, gentle with him meant that his stern cut voice was just slightly less so, but that small difference was enough. I peeked over at him as I put the finishing touches on his small chest of things, gently shutting the lid. He had most of his things packed already, clothes, any equipment and of course his cot. It worried me how little he actually had for personal effects, everything he owned had a purpose.

_What was keeping him here beyond his duty?_

Everything, aside from his chest, had already been placed outside so we could move them next door. Filo had become far more picky than either of us expected and had her preference for her own private space, hence the need to move absolutely everything in Naofumi's tent. It had shocked me initially to hear she'd prefer sleeping all alone in her quarters, but I suppose there was enough time for her to start going through some semblance of desiring independence.

"Yes Master?"

I said gently, standing up from the chest before leaning over to dust my knees of any clinging dirt. My boots slightly crunching on the hard earth, I had noticed something different about Naofumi's tent, like a different energy and smell. It wasn't bad, just altogether removed from the feel of my own space, I don't believe I ever had the opportunity to sense the difference between us as individuals. With our own homes, leaving marks upon the world in our own unique ways.

_Perhaps with time I'll get to experience—_

_NO! NO!_

_Do not think about that!_

My heartbeat began to throb in my chest and I quietly attempted to slow my breathing, my eyes still watching him. Waiting for whatever he had to say with palpable anticipation, even with the rest of my existence being devoted to keeping my wandering mind complacent. My hearing caught the small inhalation of air before Naofumi would speak.

"I was thinking of organizing the temporary housing in a grid formation."

He held out a roll of parchment, his gaze roaming over the page. They were the plans for the entire village, a blueprint for the future and present, he had drawn them up at the very beginning of all this. Adding and subtracting from it repeatedly, though he rarely took it out when not in his quarters. I could hear him writing on it late into the night, and it used to worry me, but I knew it just meant he was passionate. My focus came back, thoughts pushed away as I moved to reply.

"That'd be fine. That could make it easy to navigate, correct?"

He would nod quietly before muttering his next few words.

"I'm sorry Master, what was that?"

He cleared his throat and looked up from the blueprints as he would roll them up and tie it shut with a coarse strip of twine. The binded roll disappearing into the inner confines of his cloak, the slight warping in his apparel disappearing as he readjusted himself.

_I could never figure out what he was hiding on his person._

"I was comparing it to a city in my world is all." I gave a soft 'hm' at his words and that seemed to catch his attention.

"Something the matter Raphtalia?" I blinked and let out a soft chuckle, feeling a tad embarrassed that he caught my reaction.

"It's… childish Master, nothing to be concerned about."

He would cross his arms as I spoke, like a disciplinarian, it reminds me vaguely of my time with him In the beginning. Back when I had no idea what this man intended with my life, quiet memories played themselves and I let a small smirk tug on my lips. Even back then he was a caring man, even if he forced me to take that horribly bitter medicine. He seemed so different now, but I knew it was because he was comfortable around me, everything he's shown me was always there. I wonder what he was like in his world, was he quiet?

_Was he… popular?_

I winced when that thought occurred to me, maybe Master was trying to get back to someone and not just his world. Something about that train of thought made me extremely bitter. Master moved to speak and the thoughts dissipated once more, my smirk having faded.

"Okay then, would you like to start moving things into your tent?" I thought about it for a brief second, was there anything left? The minutiae of planning had been completed, I had played a part in this idyllic place. What Master was planning, however, was truly a city in the making. A place where we can build a home, and by extension a much more useful army.

"Hm, yes, I suppose after that we'll start setting up the new tents?" He nodded before moving to my side of the room, causing me to freeze up a bit at the way he crossed towards me. I became almost unresponsive as he did so, my fingertips twitching against the inner breadth of my palm. Before he would lean down to pick up the chest at my feet, ushering me ahead with his eyes.

_I need to stop reacting so much…_

I thought to myself as I slowly relaxed and moved on from my spot to the entrance of the tent.

Reaching out to draw open the flap and allowing Naofumi to head out ahead of me. Taking one more look around at the now completely empty tent and feeling a small sense of melancholy before I would slip out. Outside I watched as Naofumi moved down the short distance between his tent and mine, lugging the chest in his arms, he turned himself to move diagonally into my quarters. Slipping into the confines as I stood there watching, before it hit me that I wasn't being much help.

I would move myself to one of the things we had set outside beforehand and take it up into my arms, the object had little heft but I handled it with the utmost care. Probably some learned respect for my Master's things.

_If only he took care of himself the way he takes care of us…_

I sighed softly and proceeded to move my way to my tent, knowing that it wouldn't be long until Master was set up. Wondering if we'd have to move some of my things around.

"...and there!"

Naofumi says after finally organizing his things in a way pleasing to him. We hadn't spent that long moving his things to the tent but it was quite precious to watch Master as he tried to decorate his side of the room with what little he had in that department. Speaking of, Master had opted to take the opposing corner of the tent, so if one were to walk in they would see me on the left-hand side furthest from the door. Then Naofumi, who sat on the right-hand side closest to the entrance, I had made an objection that he didn't need to set himself by the opening but it was quickly spurned.

"I prefer a breeze when I sleep."Is what he said. I sat on my cot to watch him work, quite satisfied with my position. Trying to think back to another time he had done the same but it was lost to me.

_We never had our own space in the early days and I'd hardly count our carriage as..._

_Scratch that, that wagon was our home, just like this place is now._

Nevertheless, it wasn't necessarily our own living space since we shared the back with our stock.

_Hm… watching Master trade was like watching him fight, focused and detailed, never missing a thing._

_Forethinking and ruthless._

He moved his chest a little to the right at the foot of his cot, I assume to make it centered. He took a step back and made a strange symbol with his hands, peering into it with his tongue slightly stuck out.

"What's that supposed to be, a spell?" I asked him, I don't remember him ever making that sign with his hands before. But Master just snickered at that before looking over to me as his hands returned to his sides, a low smile on his face.

_He looks so comfortable._

I felt my hands squeeze on the edges of my cot, feeling a tad embarrassed. But when he spoke he did it with a strange softness.

"No Raphtalia it's… um… why don't I show you?" I brightened up, feeling my tail softly swish across the covers before uttering.

"Are you sure—" Naofumi signaled with his hand for me to stand so I did, not even finishing my protest.

"Come, stand at the end of your space like me." I do as I was instructed and move over to the end of my bed, with a wave of his hand he'd motion me to take a small step back.

"You're going to want to get it all at once." I gave him a confused glance and he just gleamed at me, coming over he would move behind me.

"Master?" I inquired gently before he would speak in return, almost in a curt way but there was still that softness.

"Put your arms up like I did." I would oblige him and hold up my arms, feeling incredibly ridiculous all the while. Holding my hands out as if I were some priests addressing their flock. My thoughts drifted back to the day when we were all almost wiped out by that horrible priest from the church. Thankfully we were able to survive, but how much more powerful could our enemies become, like that Glass woman. Naofumi seemed to defy expectations at every turn, but what if one day he alone wasn't enough? What if I wasn't enough?

A soft inhale before he would speak.

"Now… here." His arms came up my sides, feeling them brush against me almost made me choke. My rampant paranoid thoughts coming to a quiet end. But his hands came to gently take my own, if I wasn't shivering before I certainly was now.

"Are you cold Rapthalia?" His fingers brushed the inside of my palm and I could almost cry out in delight.

_Compose yourself!_

"No Master, my skin is naturally cool." I could just hear his skepticism but it didn't last.

"Now… what you're gonna wanna do is…"He wielded my hands, shaping an L with my left and right hand. Using my thumb and forefinger from each to do so as he closed the rest of my digits.

He'd twist the positioning of my left hand so the top would be facing me, then the right's so it's palm was facing me. Through all this, I felt as if I were on fire and to spite the needles in my nerves it was paradise to be virtually held like this.

"Raphtalia." I was not paying attention and recognized he held my hands in the same way he had his, his own pulling away to gently grab me at my shoulders. My reinforced clothing impeded him from fully holding me there, but still, it sent tremors down my spine.

"Do you see?" He asked.

I glowed, looking through the symbol he created for me and saw what he hinted. Framing it almost concentrated my side of the room, I could see all I wanted to see here. It could certainly help with decoration.

_Practical._

But it looked like a drawing in a frame, though I never saw a sketch of the inside of a tent before, it was like it was composed here. Just for me at this instant.

"Like a picture." Naofumi uttered so softly that I could barely make out his words, he was still gripping me, and now that fact became all I could focus on.

Breaking the frame so I could bring my hands up to his, keeping him in place against me, feeling their firmness. Startling myself when he didn't jerk away, I couldn't say why but I knew for a fact I stunned him. I moved my fingers along his bare knuckles and felt my heartbeat pound so wildly in my chest.

_This was it..._

There was so little time in the day, and everyday could be the end by some unseen threat, why should I hesitate in attempting to make us both happy? I had to be truthful to him, since this might be the only opportunity I would ever get, right now. This moment, this rare moment in time where it was just for us.

"Ma-Master I—"

"Raphtalia!?" A third voice rang out.

I was interrupted, I lost my momentum and instantly my words petered out. Master Naofumi abruptly pulled his hands away with a sharp awkward cough that made my nerves turn to ice. I felt my breathing begin to strain in my throat before I stagger away instinctively, taking a few steps away as he took a half step back. He was gazing at me, I could feel my breathing settle as my heart's pounding deafened my hearing. I would reach up with my right hand and run it through my vibrant hair, trying to relax as the intense mixture of anger and humiliation washed over me in waves. I turned myself slightly to look at him, feeling there was bright red on my face so I would attempt to hide my expression. Not knowing what I could say but my brain settled on something and I felt my lips move before I could stop myself.

"I… I'm sorry Master."

"For what?" He asked which made me sort of ponder what I was admitting guilt for.

_He didn't know what I was intending to say._

_Right?_

"Um… just, I'll get the door." I promptly stuttered, still not looking at him as I moved on from where I stood to the front of the tent.

"Yeah." He said, moving back to his side of the room.

_Good lords above I hate this._

I reached up to gently massage my features, aiming to calm myself down for whoever was at the door. The voice sounded familiar but I still had no inclination to who it was. I reached out and pulled open the flap, the rays of dying sunlight blazing on the low lit interior of our tent. A tiny form stood outside and bounced up as soon as it saw me.

_Fiiiiiillllloooo…_

I groaned internally, of course it'd be her interrupting me and Master Naofumi. I gently started gnawing the inside of my cheek. Trying to hide my distinct frustration.

"Hey Raphtalia? Have you seen Master?"

I felt a hasty jolt of jealousy race up my spine, my hand starting to grip onto the burlap tent.

It was an unpleasant emotion that forced its way into my mind, I felt momentarily shocked with myself but even that couldn't stop me from replying.

"Why? What's the matter Filo?"

She would tap her toe behind her on the ground, hands before herself pressing her index fingers together. She looked upset, and that look was slowly wearing away my internal dissatisfaction.

_Of course she'd want to see him, stop being so selfish._

"He… wasn't in his tent when I came by, and all his stuff is gone…"

She paused and suddenly she reached up to wipe her eyes, sniffling softly.

"D-did Master leave?"

She squeaked out, and it hit me that Filo wasn't dumb. She knew about the way Master had been talking and it suddenly occurred to me that this was the reason she was trying to become more independent. Trying to estrange herself so it wouldn't hurt so much if he did up and leave one day, which is the exact opposite to me. Trying to hug desperately to him so he'll never leave, or at least so i'll never be alone.

Before I could understand what I was doing I got to my knees before her, and reached up to gently cup her face in my hand. She finished wiping her eyes and I smiled somberly, moving so my sleeve could dry her face. She looked towards me with her bright blue eyes glazed over with tears, reaching up with my other hand to stroke the top of her hair, my thumb touching over her cowlick before settling in her scalp.

"Listen Filo, Master Naofumi will never leave us." She gave a weak noise in response and leaned into my hand. Pausing for a brief second more before suddenly rushing in to hug me, stifling her face into my neck.

_She's still so young…_

_Just like me…_

I brought my right arm around her back, my left hand still holding her head with a soothing stroke of her hair. I could feel her warm tears welling up on my skin, she was trembling. Simply terrified at the idea that Naofumi could leave us.

"Raphtalia is right you know."

Naofumi was listening of course, and I could hear his boots come up behind me from inside the tent.

"And we all know how terrible she is at lying."

Huffing my exasperation I expected Filo to tear away from me as soon as he moved up, but for some reason she just held me tighter, adjusting herself so her face could look up at Master. I gently pat her on the back and she loosened her grip on me, allowing me to stand up from our embrace to look at Naofumi. His expression was firm, like he was showing us without words his resolve in being with us. But the look was tinged with a somber mood, at least to me.

"P-please don't leave us Master…"

She whimpered out before she slowly moved in to hug him, burying her face in his shirt but with her height, it was only into his stomach. I could see the tear stains on her face as she moved to him, drying herself against him as he looked at me.

_Looking lost._

I motioned for him to go ahead, it wasn't something I could help with, but I knew Naofumi already felt what he had to do. He looked back to our Filolial Queen with his expression drifting in thought, before he refocused himself.

"Hey, hey… what'd I say, Filo?"

He spoke softly, his hand coming over to rest at the top of her head, gently smoothing over her scalp.

"Raphtalia was a bad liar?" She murmured into him. Getting me to frown as this had suddenly become a point of humor.

_I could be lying!_

_Neither of you know!_

I crossed my arms with a slightly sharper huff of air, but any sense of frustration faded away as warm emotions bubble up instead. Watching them reminded me of my first night with Naofumi. I simply couldn't help myself, moving over to the two, Naofumi looked at me expectantly but I had no intention for whatever he was possibly thinking. I reached in to slide my arm through his, he blinked down to me as I softly laid my head on his shoulder. My free hand reaches down to massage the other side of Filo's scalp. The young Queen nuzzling into her Master's clothing. Naofumi continues, his voice vibrating subtly, a pleasant sensation as we all embraced.

"Yes, Raphtalia is a bad liar."

"Master!" I quietly growled next to him, tightening my form against his as a warning. Only getting the man to chuckle softly at my expense. He seemed surprised by my actions but he would relax as he spoke.

"But… she was right about me leaving, and that I won't. For as long as I live I will never leave your side." Filo tugged on his front, getting us both to look down at her as she moved to speak.

"Then you better live forever and ever Master!" Finally I felt a soft chuckle leave my lips, nestling myself against Naofumi as he looked at me before he would look back to Filo.

"Forever and ever." He said incredibly softly, letting his cheek press against the top of my head.

I allowed my eyes to close, just enjoying the moment.

I couldn't describe the time we spent like this, it was beyond words. Time became a distant memory, but of course there had to be an end.

"Raphtalia?"Naofumi spoke, his weight lifting from my head causing me to reactively murmur in discomfort.

"Raphtalia." I opened my eyes and peered up at him, my face only turning part way towards him since we were so close. I fought with myself at the idea of facing him head on with only a few centimeters of space between us. Naofumi smirked and suddenly I was aware that he was trying to pull his arm from me.

Which I was resisting without realizing.

_Lost in the feeling._

Still holding him to me I blinked, my face becoming quite flushed in the seconds I continued to hold him.

"So-sorry Naofumi."

I removed my hold on him, taking a half step back before crossing my arms around my stomach.

Trying to preserve the feeling of warmth he had, but it had already gone. Naofumi now turned his attention to Filo, who looked up towards him with a pout on her face.

"Now now, we can't stay like that forever." Filo muttered something that made Naofumi chuckle, turning to look at me once more before she would also release her hold on him.

"Filo? Do you want to stay with me and Raphtalia?" She nodded vigorously, seeming to be returning to her happy outspoken self which was endearing. But a nagging thought at the back of my mind told me that something was still off.

_Life wasn't as simple as a quick hug and a kiss away from being less complicated._

… _Why a kiss?_

_W-we haven't kissed!_

My gaze drifted to Naofumi with that thought and I felt my nerves scream at me, turning away from them both in preparation for my growing embarrassment. Ears perked up in attention as my tail unwillingly swished back and forth, I thought I had gotten better at controlling it.

"Well where are your things Filo?" I heard him ask.

"My room, will Master help me bring them over?" She asked in her signature sweet voice.

"Of course Filo, Raphtalia do you want to help as well?"

I felt his eyes on the back of my head and I turned to look at him, not directly with a bashful smile on my face as I spoke.

"Of course! It'll be faster with the three of us anyway, and we can pass the plans on to the volunteers so they can start on the tent building." Master nodded once before ushering Filo out of the tent, she left and I moved to follow her out but suddenly Naofumi barred the way. I had refused to look directly at him but now I looked up at him baffled for a moment, but his eyes said this wasn't the time for me to talk.

"We need to speak, in private." What happened, was there something wrong?

My mind began racing, concocting theories and strategies but all of that disappeared when I realized that I was the issue in his eyes. He hadn't mentioned anything else of note, he was staring directly down at me, expression firm and imposing. My heart deflated at that, thinking all this time I was finally breaking through his shell. Only to have all the tenderness from today completely devoid in his request.

_Scratch that… his order._

_I thought…_

_I thought we were getting through this._

_But here I am, nothing but a disciplined child under his look._

My eyes quickly shifted from his unflinching face and to the ground, I breathed in and looked up at him. I felt my lip twinge unexpectedly as a surge of emotions boiled up in my throat.

_No._

_I'm not a kid anymore._

The way he said that to me just set me off, and even my tail started to puff aggressively. He could see my frustration, and he met my growing scowl with one of his own. His dry look now turning to a displeased glow. Normally I would break under his look, but I was different now, I'm not weak.

_I am his equal._

Now I stood up straight, crossing my arms with a hushed 'hmpf' as I spoke.

"Fine." With that I moved past him and out the tent, his footsteps following behind me as I felt the open air breeze past my face. Looking out after Filo, who had already moved several steps ahead of us, I would pick up the pace as Master fastened the entryway closed. My thoughts swirling in a bubbling mixture of disappointment and anger.

_Master Naofumi will know I am his equal._

I had to admit the difference between Filo, myself, and Master was drastic.

In that order it was apparent that we had developed radically different habits. Filo as it turned out was quite flippant when it came to her personal items, gathering many things for herself in the relatively short time we lived here. I believed myself to be modest in my pursuit of objects. But then there was Master, who's possessions only consisted of the essential, the only gift he'd ever received to my knowledge was his jewelling hammer.

"Raphtalia, give me a hand with this?" Naofumi spoke out.

Enticing me to twist around on the solid wooden flooring with my boots softly creaking on the breadth of one of the planks. I was acting pleasant, but Naofumi and I had this growing aura of conflict surrounding us. Every time after we left the tent, when I would look at him he would have this unresponsive expression on his face. That look only continued to make me more resolved in my frustrations. I moved across the room to him as he seemingly struggled to lift one of Filo's chests, slightly confused. I looked towards her as she stuffed a few more of her things into a pack. Bending over to assist Naofumi as I spoke.

"Filo, what do you have in this chest?" Naofumi lifted his end slightly from the ground and I moved my hands around my side to find a proper grip before lifting it in return. I probably should have paid attention to Naofumi's strained expression because as I lifted it, it became strikingly clear this chest was extremely heavy. Even with the two of us we struggled to hoist it up to our waists. I felt my muscles strain in exertion, paying close attention to Master's steps as he led us out of the room, Filo following us with her eyes as we did so. Myself refusing to look directly at him, still only stealing side glances every now and again. But even with those my emotions hardly ceased being angry.

"Oh you know… pretty rocks, shiny metal, and some monster bits that I thought looked neat."

I felt baffled at that response, which distracted me long enough to look up to Master. However Naofumi remained quiet, my gaze flicking away before the confusion subsided. Only to have my growing animosity replace it.

I cleared my throat and just resigned my thoughts to the task at hand, it wouldn't do me any favors to stew over any of this.

Surprisingly, getting Filo set up was a short affair, even with the ungodly amount of what seemed to be Filo's cartsworth of items. But within an hour we had the entire space ready for the young Filolial. Any momentary reprieve wouldn't last as we had all decided to help out with the finishing touches of the new tents. Assisting and assigning the newcomers to their temporary homes. It was relieving to see their sullen expressions lighten as they were given places to sleep. At this point in the day the sunshine had dwindled to a dimmed orange hue, the last hour of daylight upon us until darkness set in.

We were ahead of schedule in every respect. Even with many refugees stopping Master Naofumi to praise him for being an honorable hero. He would dismiss them gently. Never really being the one to bask under the spotlight. But at one point our gazes found one another and he was the one who quickly shifted away. I was quick to attribute that to something that could've grabbed his attention, but I knew it was because of what he wants to talk about.

That order still hung over me like a storm cloud and I simply couldn't shake the implications from my mind.

_Was he going to be mad with me?_

_Why does he get to be mad!?_

_I'm the one who should be mad!_

I felt my pulse rise, and as I felt my hands clench firmly into fists watching him ignore my look.

I took one large step in his direction before a voice stopped me in my tracks.

"Hey Raphtalia! Over here." Someone needed me.

_That someone happened to not be Master._

I thought with a bitter vitriolic tone in my head. I turned towards the voice and called back.

"I'll be right there!"

Still fuming I marched off from his sight, not even looking back as I found myself at the opposite end of the housing the volunteers constructed. Only to find Keel waiting for me with a wide grin on his face.

"Hey Keel, I've seen you've been helping out tonight." I say warmly, forcing myself to remain pleasant even if I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs.

_He always gets to be the one angry, or frustrated, or annoyed!_

_Why can't he see that I care about him._

_Why does he just…_

Keel had said something but I was too engrossed in thought to notice.

"I-I'm sorry Keel, what'd you say?" I asked after shaking my overbearing thoughts away. My young friend chuckled softly at that and moved to speak again.

"I said, I missed you at lunch, did you eat?" He had this warm concern in his voice, which was strange since between the two of us I was the adult. I rolled my eyes in an exaggerated way before nodding.

"Yes I did, Master Naofumi and I had to go over the plans for this today so we ate while we worked." I gestured as I spoke, to the many tents that had already been built. We had instructed the head builder before we left for Filo's things, so work could continue without our oversight and they had made incredible progress in our absence. My gaze drifted back to Keel and I thought for a moment I could see him scowl, that expression disappeared as I looked at him.

"So you ate lunch with Naofumi-sama?"

I nodded once before idly wondering how many more tents needed to be completed.

"Well at least you got something, how about dinner? Some of the other workers were talking about doing a small celebration for the newcomers and I'm sure they'd love for their hero to show up." I scoff quietly, tilting my head a bit to the right down at him as my arms crossed over my torso before saying.

"Who are you calling a hero?" Keel chuckled and shrugged his shoulders.

"I think I was calling you one." I huffed quietly and felt my chest ache slightly, turning off to look towards where Naofumi once was. Not seeing him, I made the conclusion that somebody had asked for his help, most likely setting up another tent.

"Master Naofumi is the only Hero I know." I said quietly, despite our current conflict I still couldn't shake my feelings or disparage him. I sighed, considering the possibility of apologizing for my behavior.

_I just wanted him to be happy, and to be happy with me, why was it so hard to be..._

… _Be what?_

I asked myself, I felt my mood take a turn and rather than anger or bubbly happiness I just felt the cold sting of emptiness.

_I want him to acknowledge me as his equal._

_But for what purpose?_

I knew that, but I knew there was something far more intense under that desire, was it love?

Had I really considered the possibility in reality. Fantasies and daydreams are a touch more manageable than when I look Naofumi in the eyes and see the man who saved my life.

Who made me the woman I am today. I can never repay him, but maybe I could give his life here something to hold on to.

Something to live for.

To fight for.

_What am I even thinking…_

_There's so much at stake and here I am, being angry, jealous and longing._

_So trivial but it feels so important now._

Keel hadn't said anything more so I turned back to him before saying.

"I would love to, but Master Naofumi and I have a lot to do before we need to head to bed, if we finish before the celebration ends I'll try to go–"

"Don't worry about it Raphtalia." He said rather suddenly.

So much so my train of thought was cut off, my lips in mid motion but now they just hung open, before I let myself close them. After a brief second Keel turned from me and started walking away.

"Um… see you around, Keel." He gave me a wave that felt incredibly dismissive, I couldn't quite put into words how that made me feel. But I moved my hands to my hips, exhaling noiselessly before turning back to the direction of Master Naofumi. My mind now fills itself with nervous, paranoid theories of what Naofumi has to speak to me about.

_Hopefully…_

My mind drew a blank, what was I hoping for?

My boots crunched on the earth, my hair was tugged by the sea breeze blowing in the air.

Dread seeped into the earth around me, but everything was healing, my ear flicked as a particularly strong gust of wind caught the inside. I inhaled the taste of salt from the sea and remembered a time with my father. Those thoughts calmed my eager mind, but my hopeful mood never ceased. I suppose I'll know when I know, but next I would have to talk to Naofumi.

Then everything will be better, or it won't be.


	2. Playing in the Moonlight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, i must've been stumped for months on how to do this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it as much as i did writing it.

Night had finally fallen over the village, the starless night sky appearing just after the bright orange horizon slipped from view. The air grew colder almost instantaneously from the sun’s absence and I could feel a steady chill growing as the breeze from the sea moved back in. It was constant throughout the day and even more chilling in the night, the breeze somehow always forcing my bare skin to prickle in response to it’s embrace. I sensed a few strands of hair break free from me and one in particular blew across my upper lip. Tickling flesh with a touch of delicate annoyance.

I reached up with my right hand to pull it from my face, but this small action made me incredibly aware of how exhausted I was becoming, exhaling softly as I rolled the rebellious hair back over my ear to secure it once more. However in this particular place in time after the sun set and the stars had yet to shine, the sky was entirely empty. Devoid of all delicate light, pure blackness hung over me and I let my eyes wander up into that deep abyss above me. I remembered all the times I would wait to see this where I would reach my hand out to that space, a child’s curiosity, fascinated by that eternal emptiness. Despite that I always dreaded that maybe one day I would be consumed by it’s merciless expanse of nothing.

I remembered asking my parents one particular question that made them chuckle softly under their breaths.

An innocent question from their curious, innocent daughter. I felt my face twinge unexpectedly as the memories played themselves for me.

_ “Why doesn’t the Moon wake up sooner?” _

_ My father would smile at me after Mother and him would exchange a glance that only made me more confused. Then he would ask me to come sit on his lap besides the living room window, ‘to watch the stars,’ he had said. I would oblige him and take my place on his lap as Mother returned back to her sewing, though I could see her eyes flicking up to us every now and again. Their brilliant shine much like the stars themselves, I would look to Father as he began speaking. _

_ “Raphtalia, when you look up and see that empty sky, it just means the lights above are getting ready to wake up.” He pointed for me to look out into the sky, starlight glittering across the expanse, beautifully marking the night background as the Moon shone itself as the single most stunning thing on that blackened stage. _

_ As if the gods above had granted this pale giant a grace of brilliance for our viewing tonight. _

_ “I know father… But… the Moon? Why does the Moon fall behind?” _

_ “Because Raphtalia, the Moon must shine the brightest for the night, for she is jealous of the Sun’s radiance.” _

_ “Why is she jealous?” _

_ “Because the Sun doesn’t share the sky with many other beautiful things,” _

_ He would pause, his hand against the small of my back, and I would look at him. _

_ My young eyes aflame with wonder. _

_ “The Moon has an endless background of beautiful starlight, so she believes she must shine more than any one of them.” _

_ “Does she not know how bright she is Father?” _

The memory faded, and with it the stars began to bloom. First a handful of dots appeared, then another, eventually thousands upon millions of tiny specks of light began expressing themselves in that cold abyss above the Earth. The Moon waited, because she had to shine the brightest of them all, so that we may appreciate her beauty among the dotted sky. I inhaled softly, cold salty air made itself known to me, I exhaled from my mouth and felt a warm rolling breath escape me. My eyes never glanced away from the beautiful sight above me.

_ It’s been too long since I recalled this. _

_ Entirely far too long. _

_ Please forgive me Father.  _

I withdrew my gaze from the evening expanse, my eyes finding themselves stuck on the blue spattered earth, the far away blazing lanterns hardly shining on the spot I found myself standing.

I closed my lips, feeling a tiny expression of joy on my face.

“Raphtalia!”

I almost jumped, having been so engrossed in my moment that the surrounding scenery drifted away. My gaze searched for the source of the voice, my eyes landing on a broadly shaped Demi male, Se’Li. A man who had secured his place in our community as a quick and efficient worker. He had a knack for architecture that far surpassed anyone I knew of personally so by effect he made construction and reconstruction almost trivial. Of course there were setbacks but nothing catastrophic had happened so far with him managing the workers.

He had a bright genuine smile on his face, the sides of his strong olive skin being gently caressed by light. Which just so happened to come from the lantern he held in his right hand. I looked around the roadway that ran along the outside edge of the temporary housing to a far off lantern that had been lit for the evening hours. They were by no means invasive, and only served as waypoints for patrolmen in the night, since we were such a small community before, it was wasteful to light any more.

I had a growing inclination that would have to change.

I turned back towards Se, giving him a single handed wave with my right hand as my left nervously palmed the hilt of my sword. My small moment of alone time was stripped away, and I could feel the anticipation for tonight weigh on me once more. Compounding my soothing reminiscing with a sharp pang of frustration. After I spoke to Keel, Naofumi had avoided me entirely, and he made sure to work effectively as far away from me as he could.

The whole thing felt childish, the way he kept turning away so we weren’t looking at each other. So as the evening crept in I kept telling myself these things I wished to say to him when we speak tonight. But there was no chance I would be resolved enough to say them all, and it was highly unlikely he would just stand there and let me spill my heart out to him. He’s made it abundantly clear that he thinks of me as his daughter, perhaps I’m just entranced with him because of some childhood memories. But I knew in my heart that there was something more to this than just a crush on the Shield Hero. These were my feelings for Naofumi Iwatani, and I would make him know that.

At least that’s what I kept reminding myself of.

_ Why is he making this so difficult… _

I didn’t want him to just accept my feelings without words, but now that the path existed I felt extreme dread at the prospect of the other possibility. A negative reaction to my advances and feelings, I hoped dearly that wouldn’t happen, but the pain in my heart grew more and more as the long night continued.

“Raphtalia! We’re putting the finishing touches on the last tent, come celebrate with everyone!”

_ Everyone? _

I gave him a warm, fake smile and a look that said ‘I’ll be right there,’ but I paused, seeing him disappear towards the last tent. Glancing up to the sky and letting out a sudden shaky breath I would move to stifle myself as a pathetic wracking cry tried to escape me. My right hand clasped over my mouth to prevent the noise. Not knowing where these emotions erupted from, I felt the burn in my eyes before the tears started welling in them, blurring my vision. I would face myself down at the ground again to quietly wipe my eyes with my sleeve, my expression warped with a low croaking sob.

_ Why..? _

_ Why am I so upset… _

I would think to myself as the tears blotched themselves on my sleeve, drawing my arm over my eyes for what felt like the hundredth time as my emotions experienced one more tumbling whirlwind. I felt incredibly small now, and all I could bring myself to think about was Naofumi’s arms around me.

_ Even when I’m mad, mad enough to cry, I just want him here. _

“Why am I so  _ weak? _ ”

I hissed at myself, as if vocalizing my own frustration at myself was enough to cut off this tide of unwanted sadness. I couldn’t tell what had brought me to tears, or what was making me so angry about all of this. Naofumi could simply want to discuss something, it didn’t have to be about us, right?

_ He could just be worried about something, he’s always worrying about the future, so… _

_ That could be it... _

I lied to myself, which I wasn’t terribly good at doing since I could tell it was a lie right away. Not even a momentary self deception for me. 

I would sigh and allow my hand to fall to my side, still drying my face with my right sleeve before that too would go limp, my tears finally ending. My gaze remained on the ground for a few more moments longer before I resolved myself to move on. My entire form moving from my spot, boots meeting gravel, my right arm limply filling the space next to me. While my left handed fingers slid up and down the handle of my blade in a nervous tick. Heading towards where Se’Li disappeared, my thoughts muddled as the evening progressed. 

__

_ This place is much livelier than i was expecting… _

I had arrived at the party without further emotional outburst, slipping into a major clearing between all the tents that was serving as the final tent space of the evening. A sizable one much akin to a war tent or something of that nature, It started as all of the larger tents did. The workers erected a large wooden post in the designated center of it all, sinking it beneath the earth just a bit for stability. The earth that would serve as the floor was already flattened so all that was really left now was some minor post construction to lift the corners up. There were far more people here than I was expecting crowding within the space, not all of them workers. They had to be a mix of new arrivals. 

At that a new face approached me, a human no less who appeared in his early adulthood with hardly a hint of experience on his face. He was carrying a tray of drinks, holding it off to his right as he approached me. Having to be a new face but he didn’t seem afflicted by the overbearing dread that plagued the others.

“Here, they asked me to pass a drink out to everyone.” 

He had expertly taken a cup from his tray and held it out to me at it’s base. Standing firm until I gingerly accepted it into my right hand, peering into the cup for a moment to spy a familiar looking drink.

_ Who broke out the alcohol..?  _

Looking up from my cup I glanced at all the people crowding around the final tent of the night. That’s when it hit me just how full this day was, and it wasn’t even close to being done yet in my head. They had drinks out because this was a cause for a toast before going to bed, a fire beverage that would ease the sleep of anyone. Or ease the nervousness of one woman in particular. Everyone had a cup from what i could tell, at least the ones who weren’t working.

In no time at all the tent was finished with a dramatic draping of the burlap crafted covering and as it settled everyone in the space we crowded cheered. A collective of voices that just burned away the tension in that moment with a bright expression of genuine elation. Then just as the cheer died away it seemed some unconscious force drew the attention of everyone around me. Several if not all of them flowed away from my edge of the space to fill out the other sides of the tent. Trying to get a look at something. 

“Now everyone… to new faces and old ones alike, i want to commemorate this moment as the first day for our new arrivals.” 

The voice that rolled over the crowd came from my left, seeing a peeked attention drawn to that part of the crowd so I decided to move closer to the word source. It was no surprise when I found a place closer to one of the surrounding tents allowing me to view the speaker that the speech giver was Se’Li. He was reddened in the face now, seemingly out of breath and seemingly taller than the crowd. Probably embarrassed with all these eyes on him.

“I know this is a terrifying time for you, for everyone, and it may seem like this place isn’t what you were looking for. But let me promise you…  _ all _ of you that you are a part of this place, anything you need you ask. We are not in the business of leaving anyone behind… n-now… raise a cup!” Everyone followed along, raising the cup above their heads.

“Thanks to the Shield Hero, thanks to all of you, to a brighter future brought by our Heroes!”

“To a brighter future!”

The crowd mocked, and then it was cut short by everyone taking a drink. Even myself, tilting the glass back to feel the warm feeling fluid roll down into my stomach. Instantly feeling a familiar warmth ebb into my senses, it was weaker than before it seemed but I was hardly complaining. 

Then a voice sounded out next to me, a familiar one but this time it wasn’t surprising, he always managed to sneak up on me but this time it just didn’t shock me.

“Good speech.”

He said it gently and as I looked to him he had his eye ahead towards where Se’Li was standing. Now having disappeared into the crowding people.

“Mmhm,” I hummed slowly in response, enticing a small smile from him for just a moment before he turned to look at me. His eyes flicking to the cup in my hand before looking to my face again. With that same old disapproving expression. “What Master, was I not supposed to toast with everyone?” I don’t know why I said that, feeling a pit of guilt in my stomach. 

“N-no… just i wanted to talk.” 

**_Oh_ ** _ , I know. _

That was my first thought and I could feel like my vocals were straining to say it too. All the pent up frustration now amplified by the warmth within me, it seemed to loosen everything too. A whirlwind again, letting my weight hang on my right leg, cocking my hip to the side as I felt my unamused expression towards Naofumi.

“I’m aware… I suppose this isn’t a discussion to have in front of everyone?” 

Gods above me was I being snarky now, even in my loosened mindset I could sense it. His expression hardened, shaking his head once before gesturing wordlessly to follow him.

_ What a great start to confessing my feelings… calm down. _

_ __ _

A ten minute walk completely in silence was what followed, weaving out of the tents behind Naofumi until we came to the farthest road. The one I was standing by just before Se’Li called me, the lamps were low in the evening and barely lit the way. I was following at his back for the duration as he led us out of town and up the hill towards some lonely tree positioned at the crest. 

Wind whipped violently back away from the sea side, its growth warped along with the environment evoking the imagery of a viney sickle.

Curving up and out from what could be considered the handle of the trunk. I was facing out from the town and out into the encompassing darkness that existed separated from the lanterns of the town. Even the moonlight, bright as it is, couldn’t pierce the thick veil out into the boundless area of undeveloped land. We stopped, Naofumi turned to me and I could see the displeasure on his face, beneath the windswept sickle tree and my back to the town.

The only thing in my focus being Master Naofumi.

I hoped the only thing in his focus was me.

“Raphtalia…”

He began but trailed off, his firm look now fading slightly only to be replaced by a disappointed one.

“Master Naofumi.”

I replied curtly, crossing my arms across my chest. Displaying just exactly how i was going to react to whatever he said. He blinked towards me, bringing his hands back to brace on his hips.

“I suppose it’s just easier to come out and say it now huh..?”

“I would assume that would be the case, seeing as you dragged us all the way out here.”

“Raphtalia, i’m aware of your…  _ feelings _ for me.” He said it so matter-of-factly, like he knew about it better than me and it brought back a sensation of anger. I couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or the intensity of the emotions or even both but i cut him off.

“Oh are you now Master Naofumi, are you sure i’m not just misinterpreting something? Maybe I’m just confused.” I paced slightly on my side of the hill, shaking my head in disbelief at the tone he had used.

“I do think that yes… Raphtalia you can’t-”

“Don’t you  _ dare  _ Naofumi, do not keep treating me like I am a child.” His brow furrowed down as I interrupted him again.

“If you are going to act like one then i don’t see how i can treat you any differently.”

“Oh  _ I’m  _ acting like the child huh? What about today, when you kept giving me the cold shoulder.”

“That’s what you’re angry about?” He said with disbelief in his voice.

“Of course that’s not what i’m angry about! It’s everything, you… sit here and act like you always know what’s best for me all the time and I'm just supposed to act like I like it.” He huffed and crossed his arms this time as I unfurled mine. The feelings ebbing out into my arms made it hard to stay still. “What about what I feel, what I know in my heart to be true, how would you know better than that!?”

“Because it’s not real.” He hissed it out almost, causing me to freeze. I just stared at him after that, feeling something bundling up in my throat. “You convinced yourself you feel that way because of some… indebted sense from me saving you.”

“Are you kidding me, I don't question that you saved me, that you are my larger than life childhood Hero but…” That hurt a lot more than i was expecting. “But I'm not just some kid with a crush anymore, Master Naofumi. Don’t you understand that?”

“I understand that you feel something towards me, I just don’t think it’s…” He didn’t say it, like he didn’t want to admit something. It was confusing but that was the feeling I got from this moment. “... I know you’re not a child anymore Raphtalia, you’ve grown so much more capable than i could ever hope for.” There it was, that fatherly tone that reminded me that’s how he saw me.

“I am  _ not  _ your daughter, I am your partner, your equal… your sword.”

“You are my companion, yes, but you can’t make a clear headed decision about this.”

“Oh and you can, you can decide what is best for both of us without my consent?”

“No, that’s… that’s not what i’m saying.”

“Then what are you trying to say, please ordain me that revelation Master Naofumi!”

“I’m trying to say there’s too much tied up between us, I can’t… see you…”

“Can’t or won’t, maybe i’m not the one confused on how i feel. Maybe it’s you, maybe you’re the one stuck in this idea of me, of who I am.”

“Raphtalia…”

“I’ve noticed you know, no matter how much I grow or change, you still act like… like…”

“Like what..?”

“Like one day you’ll be gone, and i’ll be stuck here holding on to that idea of you and me.” My voice was shaking now, trembling inflections dancing under my words forcing my voice to break at the end of my sentence.

“I want you to grow past me, to have a life outside of… the Catastrophes.”

“Is that why we’re building this town, why you want me to take up leadership around here?”

“Yes…” He said it so weakly now, his arms going limp at his sides.

“You want me to hate you, to think my life would be better without you here with me?”

“Not hate, just… realize there’s a life without me.”

“Now that is impossible, i owe you everything… my life, my skills and my confidence. Every part of me right now was possible because of you, I’ll never pay back that debt. But that’s not why… not at all why…” 

“Then…”

“It’s because I love you Naofumi, I love  _ you _ , and I know that’s weird to hear. But it’s the truth, I don't love the Shield Hero because he saved me and nursed me back to health. I don’t love Naofumi Iwatani because he trained me how to fight for myself. I don’t even love him because of some debt I owe him, I love him because he’s you. It doesn't matter what you’ve done for me.”

“Raphtalia.”

“Can’t you see I'm being truthful, I don’t want to lie or deceive you in any way. I just want you to know  _ me _ , who I am, as your friend.” My hands came up to hold myself again, this time squeezing painfully on my sides. “I had no idea if you could feel the same, but i don’t think it matters. I’m not your daughter, or anything like that, I'm Raphtalia… a woman in love with a man.” He huffed, a short purposeful one that signified something. I was speaking to the ground now, feeling the tears burning in my eyes but at that huff I looked up towards him. He looked angry…

As he acknowledged my eyes on him he suddenly started moving forward. Stomping his boots into the wind whipped grass more like a pouty child than anything. He almost made it past me before I latched my hands on his forearm and twisted him back to face me.

“What’re you doing!” He said, the anger in his voice made me flinch. But my own frustration sparked alive again.

“You don’t get to walk away after that, we need to clear this up. I told you how i felt and now it’s your turn.”

“I don’t remember agreeing to that.” He growled at me, glancing at my hands on his arm for just a brief moment before drawing his arm away from me gently before speaking. “Fine…”

“I’m waiting.” He scowled at me once more before crossing his arms over his chest.

“I care about you Raphtalia, it’s not a question, but i don’t think of you that way.” 

It hurt… like a stab to my chest to hear those words coming out of his mouth. The brief shock taking away something truly interesting from my attention. Only for the briefest of moments he didn’t look at me. After a few brief seconds of me trying to reconcile heartbreak that’s the thing my brain latched on to. His averted gaze taking in the scenery of grass at our feet. He was unsure, very unsure.

“Look at me.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I need you to look at me when you say that.” He looked baffled, blinking in my direction after his gaze finally faced me. “In the eyes.” I clarified to him as he grumbled and did as I asked. Those piercing handsome eyes almost outshined by the soft moonlight.

“Raphtalia… I…” He stopped, he stopped… instantly my eyes welled up at his hesitation. He didn’t seem like he could say it, and my heart raced. “Raphtalia…” He swallowed, hard, trying to force words that he himself knew weren’t true.

“I know…” I almost laughed, a single tear spearing down the side of my face as I took a step closer towards him.

“I…” His breathing was harsh now, he couldn’t think I imagined, and neither could I. Just me and him, confused more-so than i’ve ever been in my whole life. But there was something I thought could work.

Closing the space between us, I snaked my right hand up his shoulder. Clasping onto him tightly as my left hand came up to gently cup his face, his right hand came up to grip onto my forearm. It was a firm hold but he wasn’t directing me, more like using me as support, his eyes were panicking just like his breathing and his face looked a tad pink.

“We… can try… right?” I said softly up to him, feeling heat on my face as well before he even nodded in affirmation. It was the only way to be sure in my mind, we were both panicking if my heartbeat was anything to go by. Tiredness ebbing into everything before repeatedly being drowned out by thumping adrenaline. 

I leaned in closer, having to stand up taller so I could do so and as the distance closed his hand gripping my arm loosened and came down to slip his fingers into my hair. Holding me gently, I felt my heart could burst from just that, but then we were close. Truly close, I could feel the heat from his breathing and smell his scent. All truly pleasant as they played back against my senses, I didn't push in though, content to stay here for all eternity if that’s what it took.

“Master Naofumi…” I whispered up towards him, my eyes shut tightly in preparation.

“R-Raphtalia…” With a subtle pull of his hand he pressed me to him, interlocking our lips with a warm gasp escaping both of us. His free hand moved forward and snaked around my back as my left hand smoothed down the side of his face and onto his other shoulder. Holding him tightly as he kissed me and I kissed him.

_ The soft glow of moonlight shining on us both, I'll love you forever, Naofumi Iwatani.  _


	3. A Minor Interruption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A minor interruption.

This was different than I expected, not in the way that could be described as negative in any sense of the concept. What was different was the overall course of actions that happened from the moment at the start to just now. His hold was tight, an arm that held me at the small of my back had gradually moved up my spine until it was wrapped around my shoulder. His right hand had repositioned as well and found itself clutching at my hip, drawing me in further to Naofumi’s form. 

It had forced my body into a moderate angle, with my form pushed up against his front following the suggestions of his hands. My own pulling back from his shoulders to brace the small open space between us on his chest. Gently drumming themselves on the plate that was strapped across. It felt like an eternity from when he first kissed me till now, but then his hold loosed on me. Clutching before like he was afraid I’d pull away and now… slightly less so. His digits would’ve been sinking into my form if I hadn't been wearing my armor and I'm almost certain that’s how my grip felt to him when I brought us close together. It was remarkably relieving that he was as nervous and fumbling like me.

We relaxed, I let my slightly raised stance sink to the grassy earth and he pulled his shoulder latched arm back to the center of me. This allowed us to part without giving too much distance between our faces. I opened my eyes first to see his face gently shadowed from the night sky. The way we stood, he leaned over me so he was slightly removed from the glow of the moon. Though I could still easily make out his features, he was rolling his lips back into his mouth, testing them for something before he too opened his eyes. Almost instinctively finding my own, I blinked once and felt an undefined emotion rising up my throat at the gaze upon me. 

I suddenly pulled away, as did he, drawing us both a full step away from each other before both parties cleared their throats. I felt incredibly hot in the face, and from what i could tell from here as Master Naofumi reached his hand up to smooth out his hair he was also moderately fazed. I had my hands positioned at my chest, clasped together as I tried to hold onto that feeling of warmth he and his cloak provided. Plus it felt soothing to the audible drum in my chest that never ceased it’s rapid beat, it was so loud I swear that Naofumi probably noticed it.

“That was…” He suddenly said, following his drifting words with a strained chuckle. This was certainly new from Master, he looked genuinely stumped from all of this, even embarrassed… “That was different.” 

“Y-yeah definitely.”

Now that i think about it, really think about, i don’t remember what i thought this was going to be like. I mean this situation kind of worked out to the best conclusion i could imagine, but i didn’t think i’d end up kissing him. Something about this line of thought made me smile, following it by a sheepish bit of laughter that somehow escaped me. I mean… this all meant that Master Naofumi felt similarly about me right? 

“Raphtalia?”

I had been staring off into space as my rampant internal monologue had droned on so this drew me back to the present. Looking at him with my never ending burning face.

“Y-yes Master Naofumi?”

_ I really kissed Master Naofumi… Really. In reality… _

“Your… tail.”

He said mildly and I snapped out of my joyous conclusion to twist back to see my very eager tail swishing back and forth wildly. I blinked once before bringing my arms back around my midsection, somewhat stepping in place as I looked back towards Naofumi. Who was now watching me fully, I doubt he was missing any of my tiny embarrassed motions.

“Yeah… I’m… happy Master,” I don’t know if that truly conveys my feelings, every beat of my heart told me that it wasn’t quite right to only use ‘happy’ as my descriptor. Elated, overjoyed, ecstatic it all applies. Overwhelming me in every aspect as I stood there trying to come up with better words. “Very happy i think.”

_ I am truly a poet… _

He didn’t respond right away, instead he mostly stood there staring at me from across the way. His arms now fell to his sides with the low soft lighting catching the edge of his shield, in fact he seemed more than quiet and I could see visibly that he was focused on something. I finally took notice and that’s when his gaze sent chills up my spine and neck. Making me feel uncomfortable as I saw his eyes looking  _ past me _ . That look being one of scrutiny and caution, the look of a focused warrior.

“Raphtalia!” 

He roared almost and it sent me to the ground in preparation, just in time for the large monster that had stalked up on the both of us to sail over me. I jumped to my feet instantly as the beast rounded about back towards me barring it’s mouthful of teeth and snarling viciously.

“Dogs… it’s a pack i think.” The dog was standing away from me, Naofumi having backed up a bit as it filled the far more open space between us now. It had those glowing red eyes typical of roaming monsters, it was still however a basic looking dog.

The dog twisted to look at Master for just a moment then back to me as I placed my hand delicately upon my sword. Gripping around the handle as it levied it’s hungry eyes towards us both, trying to decide on who to attack first. I suppose it decided on the lightly armored one of us, which just so happened to be me. My blade sang forward with a sharply pitched swish that was undercut by the visceral severing of a dog's head. Shooting up blood after the force of the blade as the rest of the body slumped forward to the ground. Carried a bit by the momentum it gained in the short gait it used to leap at me. The head tumbled to the grass and the dark shine of red catching light made the soft grass speckled with reflective crimson. 

“Most likely… and this one is definitely a scout.” 

Naofumi came forward as I turned to look back into that darkness filled nature. He came up to my side as the sounds of soft rustling surrounded us, it was evident that the rest of the pack had our escape blocked. It wasn’t as if we would’ve led them back to the village anyway, Naofumi turned and faced the outer edge of the hill, his gaze trying to find the dogs in the low grass. They were slinking just out of sight, holding my sword offensively with my back to Naofumi. I mirrored his actions. Searching the edges of what could be seen for a large pack of ravenous dogs.

“As source of thy power I order thee, decipher the laws of nature and illuminate my surroundings, Fast Light!” 

I felt the energy surge forward out of my stomach, binding upwards into my left arm as I set it above me to direct my magic. Sending out a blinding ball of energy from my palm, casting the low glow of night in a brightness akin to the sun itself. A flash revealing all of the enemies around us, deep red eyes intensely searching the both of us for any hint of fear. I’m sure they will be sorely disappointed.

Time ticked along with growing intensity, the light would only last a few moments longer and it was clear they were waiting for the cover of darkness as they hounded around us. They numbered firmly in the dozens, two packs probably merged by a higher class of hound like a cerberus. That thought only gave me the firm resolve to cleanse them even further, I growled eagerly. The rumbling instinct seizing on the internals of my throat.

“Easy Raphtalia let them come at us. They may be under our level but they have numbers, and we still haven’t seen their pack leader.”   
The seconds of light were fading away now, dimming beneath a full moon.   
  


“Understood Master.”

_ The conjured star wavered… Slowly but surely the beams of magic absorbed back into itself. Disappearing without flair and leaving us in the darkness. _

The rustling intensified around us, crescendoing upwards in volume as the storm of flesh moved together in and out of the grass around us. Flashes of soft reflective animal eyes catching in the moonlight as the sounds of low snarling started to pitch out towards us. Growing ever more in volume until the cut in of a low bark silenced the hounds around us, the tone ebbing fear into the pack as they quieted down at it’s call. Then everything became quiet once again, so quiet that I suddenly could perceive my own breathing. Their calm focused intervals evident even with everything happening.

The first set of eyes accelerated from the edges of the clearing, followed instantly by the howling of those left behind. Assumedly it was acting as a sort of buff towards these hounds that rushed forward snarling beneath me. The eyes paired off to indicate three individual hounds, moving in an arrowhead formation towards me. Only the shape of their bodies clear to me even in the moonlight bleached area, it was as if their bodies exuded shadow.

It wasn’t enough to deceive me though as the first hound was cut down with a simple flick of my blade across its side as I sidestepped it’s charge. Bringing my path into the left sided hound drawing my boot to collide hard up into its throat before twisting around to catch the mouth of the third with my sword. The hound ferociously barring its weight on me as the blade slipped into its teeth, the unpleasant whine of bone protrusions on steel. As the second hound rounded again to come at me after the daze from my kick wore off I forced the hound on my sword to the ground. Bracing the tip of my sword in my other hand before wrenching the metal down, ultimately severing the jaw of the third dog before I scrambled up to whip my blade up the front of the second hound. 

_ Four down… _

The howling ceased as the three hounds now laid slumped in the grass, scanning around I suddenly felt the pressure of Naofumi at my back. Careful to not let either of us be exposed for too long.

“They’re testing us…”

He breathed out cooly.

“How would dogs know to do that?”

“I’m not sure, whatever is leading these monsters… hm.” He paused mid sentence which enticed me to gaze back at him, his face screwed tightly into a look of concentration.

“They have no special modifiers… their name is unique though.” The quiet air around us gave a perfect poignant expression of his pause. “ _ Pack, hound. _ ”

I’d never heard of a dog monster like that before, but before the name or hidden purpose became evident Naofumi’s face hardened out at the edges of the clearing.

“They are preparing to charge, all directions. Ready yourself Raphtalia.”   
  


“Yes sir.”

My gaze switched forward just in time to see a veritable horde of dogs rush forward from the grass, the sounds of paws against the earth echoed all around us. I got the feeling that this was going to be a long evening. 

A group of four met me first as I sliced forward across their collected heads, my blade faltering just at the end of the arc and only catching the last hound in it’s eye. Twisting around to catch Naofumi rocketing a hound onto it’s back with his shield before planting his heel on its belly. Flashing forward to sever its head and to meet another hound interested in Naofumi’s side. Simply pointing my sword deep into its belly and letting its own momentum bare a sizable wound in itself. Leaving that particular hound before moving back around Naofumi to draw my blade across the side of another dog. Spilling more and more red as the fight progressed, the smell was becoming nauseating. Thick raw iron in the air of snapping jaws and repeated slices and bashes.

“Raphtalia!”

He called to me as I turned and caught him hefting a particularly large hound above him with his shield. Propelling the angry mass out above us both as his intention became clear, flashing forward and appearing just beneath the beast I swiped up and bisected the aerial creature. Letting its hunks of now dead flesh flop to the earth as another hound unfazed by its ally’s death rushed once more. Ending its life with a crushing blow from my heel, they were incredibly weak… and furthermore held no regard for their lives. It would’ve been upsetting if they weren’t threatening my life and Master Naofumi’s. 

This fight has been a lot of redirecting these hounds in my direction, drawing my foot from the skull of that deceased hound I turned just in time to catch a new hound lunging up towards me. Having caught me off guard as I was in thought, I forced my arm up in instinct to protect my neck and thankfully caught it with my armored hand. The canines dug angrily into the metal, for just long enough for me to catch it’s gaze. Hateful monster eyes through and through but something about their appearance captured me. Naofumi came around and forced his shoulder into the hound’s side and tore it away from me. The dog regained its composure on the ground. 

Watching us both and panting heavily, it was colored with a brown and black coat. With a mange peeking out from patches of rubbed away fur, it was sickly… and the final dog remaining. Seeing as not one other hound appeared now, Naofumi was guarding me as he glanced back. 

“No injuries right?”

I felt my ears twing sharply as my tail gently swiped behind me as I shook my head.

“No Master, my armor held… but, that dog…”

As if to answer my reference the lone hound started howling up into the sky, calling out in the late evening for something. Then the howl cut out sharply, as the dog began convulsing in what looked to be tremendous pain. The sickly animal drove down as it doubled over.

“What is it doing?” Master Naofumi commented as the creature seized in pain.

“I- I don’t know…” This felt too easy for the amount of intelligence these creatures displayed, and now the last one was just dying. I came around his side to watch with interest as the hound started to glow, a translucent shine that only served to make us both squint down at its shape. Then something bumped my side, something wet and stumbling. Looking down I saw the bisected hound leap into the glow before us. I honestly thought my eyes were deceiving me as I looked around further at the corpses of the surrounding dogs. All reviving and diving forward into their last member, disappearing into the glow over and over until all that was left was the blood. The shape that sat before us was akin to an amorphous blob for only a moment. Then it took a more defined shape, that of a large dog… a  _ truly _ large hound. Easily extending up to 7 feet tall at the large head that formed at the front of the body, rolling down the back it lowered to 6 feet. The first part of its body to materialize was its large paws and legs, the flow of transformation ebbing up to reveal the head of the creature. Which expressed itself in the apparition of a multi headed dog, like a Cerberus… but many more hungry mouths. Each one snapping viciously and hungerily towards us as it gained shape.

“ _ Pack, Legion…  _ It’s level is a bit higher than us... be careful.”

It must hate us now… after killing it however many times. Many eyes focused down at us both with its powerful body aching, I imagine, to kill us. Naofumi got closer to my side and drew up his shield, whispering to me slowly.

“Go for its legs, I'll distract it.  _ Don’t _ allow it to run.”

I nodded once then Naofumi charged forward to the beast, capturing its attention as it rushed forward with shocking power in its limbs. The ground itself shook in response to its powerful movement, colliding its hungry mouths against Master’s shield as it uselessly tried to break through his defense. Now for my part, dashing to the side and forward I drew my blade along the back heel of the right leg. Severing the tendon in the back and almost instantly the creature twisted around to bash me with its enormous collection of heads. It was so fast, the momentum and sudden nature of the turn caught me off guard, not even realizing I had been knocked into the air until my back slammed down to the earth once more. Vertigo and a painful throb ebbing up my side and through my senses. 

Disorientated I propped myself up on my arm to see I was knocked a clear 15 feet from the fight. I ached a truly debilitating pain but this was no time to whimper in the dirt.

“Raphtalia!” Naofumi called over to me, worriedly mixed in with his shout as I witnessed the large beast bash against his shield much like it did to me. Forcing Naofumi to give ground as it launched blunt attack after attack into the shield. I got up before clutching my side reactively as the pain screamed out. 

_ That hit certainly took the wind out of me at the very least… _

I gritted my teeth and stood up on my feet, palming for my sword but realizing it must not be here since I took that hit. It was so sloppy of me to not expect retaliation, maybe the village life had softened my instincts a bit... I glanced towards where the fight began before dashing forward in that direction. Finding it discarded in the blades of grass as a sharp cry cut through the air, forcing me to peer in Naofumi’s direction. Seeing the jaw of one of the dozens of heads had reached around his shield to bite dangerously close to his head. They were both too focused to notice me as I surged forward with a helpful burst of mana, sailing forward with blinding speed until I slid beneath the dogs legs. Swinging the blade around in a full circle to separate its legs in one whirlwind of crimson. Rolling out as it collapsed with a heartbreaking howl from its many mouths. Naofumi pulled away as its now useless nubs tried to move itself. Finding its own blood to slip on as it slicked the very earth in its draining life. The shock of losing four limbs was too great for even this creature to handle.

I shakily rose to my feet once more before coming back to its whimpering side as it slumped down. Useless and knowing its own death approaching. Given up… I brought the tip of my sword to where the heart should be and sank the hardened steel deep into its body. A pathetic mewling signifying the end of its violent existence, drawing my sword out with an exhausted sigh as I ran the blade through the crux of my elbow. Trying to wipe the blood away from the steel before returning it to the sheath.

Feeling pain flowing freely now as the adrenaline of the fight slowly faded away, the clink of the sheathed blade followed by my hand clutching my side delicately.

I moved around the creature still holding my side to see Naofumi kneeling besides the corpse. Inspecting it before glancing towards me and my self clutching position. Almost instantly his face was tinged with worry and he got up.

“I’m fine!” I said firmly as he stood before me, looking down at me with his head tilted a bit to the side.

“You sure? I saw how hard that thing hit you.” 

My eyes glanced away and I nodded once.

“I’m telling you not to worry about it Master Naofumi, it's just a bruise most likely.” He smiled at that, a soft almost unnoticeable one but it was there. He crossed his arms still watching me just as a chilled breeze cut in and filled the air with the unpleasant aroma of death. It undercut the mood as Naofumi glanced at the beast once more before turning back towards the village. I moved so i stood on his right, staring out towards the village as well, It seemed empty from this distance. A few flickering lanterns dotting the outer perimeter and deeper brighter ones igniting the inner streets. However it was clear the watch had started dousing several to create that dimming night aura that made it easier for people to sleep. Most of these lights would be snubbed out by morning so it was the only time the city was basked in soft firelight. 

I would say though that the smell of dead monsters didn’t exactly please the senses. Moving ahead of Naofumi I would glance back towards him before gesturing with my left hand for him to follow along. He blinked once and started stepping in line behind me.

“What about the monster flesh?” He said after me, having to move up a bit to stand beside me. 

“We can send a group for it all in the morning.” I blinked and the action felt extremely slow, my eyelids lazily sticking closed as the exhaustion was slowly overcoming me. 

“I hope Filo hasn’t been waiting for us all night.” I yawned out softly, slightly stepping towards Naofumi’s gait until I was brushing just alongside him. I noticed his eyes glance over at me in my peripherals as we started down the hill.

“Ready to sleep then Raphtalia?” I nodded once before also looking over at him, tired and in severe pain but I couldn't help but smile at him. Any prior frustration seemed so far away now in light of this tiring fight and of course… his kiss.

_ Oh… right… we kissed… _

As if i ever truly forgot but the memories were already locked away in things i’ll treasure forever. I felt my left ear flick curiously as Naofumi stopped, my feet following in form and halting my walk as well. He was still looking at me and now that we were distanced enough from the creature the smell could no longer ruin the heightened mood. 

“I’m sorry… but i’m going to have to insist we look at that bruise.”

“ _ Naofumi… _ ” I glared daggers at him as he started chuckling. Perhaps he wasn’t aware of my intentions just yet but the way he so casually crushed the quiet moment frustrated me again. I snubbed my nose at him and decided to move away from him, that is until he suddenly wrapped his arms delicately around my shoulders. Drawing me into his chest with a gentle huff of surprise that left me from the sudden action. His arms were overtly gentle, careful not to agitate anything that might have been wounded. 

_ This… is pleasant… _

“I’m happy too…” He murmured out alongside my ear, getting my entire body to stiffen up in response to him. He seemed to notice as he held me there, my arms slowly came around his midsection and held him tightly.

“Good…” To be completely honest, this was the best case scenario in my head. My tail swished even more as dangerous thoughts kept replaying in my head. We had moved so quickly to kissing, what did that even mean to a relationship. What even is a relationship like this… hopefully Naofumi was more knowledgeable than I, all i ever heard about was kissing and… how good that was. It was certainly good as I recalled the pleasant feelings, it was almost like lightning zipping with thundering velocity between our connection, beyond that I could tell that it was all a bit formless. He had kissed me but it was impulse, unfamiliarity playing between us both as our bodies struggled to get used to the sensation.

_ Is there any way to improve that? _

My instincts provided the answer once again, as my arm drew back from around him. I think it surprised him because he pulled back a bit to look down at me, his hands now resting gently on my shoulders. I didn’t look at him directly as my palms came back up to his chest plate, staring at my fingertips as they drummed themselves on the plate with subtle reverberations that ended too quickly within the metal. 

_ Was it possible to stay like this forever… Naofumi and I, together like this forever? _

A part of me wanted to believe in that notion, that he would never leave or that there wouldn’t be any pain anymore from this moment forward. But as if to spite my thoughts the injury at my side flared up, getting my form to tense up as a soft hiss escaped my lips. Struggling to contain myself in front of him. I knew this was impossible for us, i knew it from the moment i trusted him that one day something would irrevocably change and we would… fall apart. Was this decision, this pact to care for one another this way just one more stepping stone to the dissolving of our relationship? I won’t say it definitively, as I look up from my tensed fingers and finally up to Naofumi I smile. Involuntary it stretched across my lips, the giddiness from just being this close to him seemed to melt the pain away but it was still there just ebbing along the surface. Waiting beneath everything for its opportunity.

_ His eyes are so green. _

What did that even mean, did it even matter? Though, staring into those striking eyes. The same ones that watched me throughout our journey together, the same ones that held a hidden kindness with every action. The same ones that feared betrayal at every turn, the same ones that held unspeakable rage. I felt safe, the world around me didn’t seem so terrifying and foreign anymore. What luck to have eyes like that in my life.

“Raphtalia?”

He said it softly, like he was gently waking me from sleep. The movements of his lips were almost intoxicating from this distance, and I felt my smile faltering with the subtle twitch of desire pulling the expression from my face. Furthermore, heat started to rise up my neck from the silence that overtook us both after he said my name. 

“Your eyes…”

I said simply, I couldn't quite form the words required to express the level of admiration behind that. It all just evaporated in my mouth then flaked to ash. Naofumi kept firm with my words but he did blink, the most flinch I've ever seen in his face. How do I tell him that there was nothing else in the world I'd rather see? How do I tell him that it was easy to declare my love, it was simple to overcome my fear when I kissed him and it was easier still to hold my gaze in his. 

I don’t think i can, i’ll never be able to repay him and i’ll never be able to express just how much he means to me. What a tortuous life to live where i can’t express myself correctly. If i could ask for just one thing that would be my choice, but i suppose i’d just have to settle for being honest. But I couldn't believe the amount of sheer panic that flooded me as I sat here with vindicated emotions.

“They’re beautiful…”

An eroding vapor slowly degraded my thoughts further until the ability to talk was taken from me. The dry itch on my tongue now began in earnest as I kept staring up at him with every passing second hurtling me towards absolute ruin. I didn’t want to think anymore, my hands naturally moved up from his chest and found themselves placed on his cheeks.

Cupping his features, framing his expression with my thumbs gently stroking along the bareness of his cheek. Fingertips lost in the mess of hair he had but i didn’t mind, it all felt like silken fabric. Barely an imperfection to be found by my understanding as the crevices in his skin continued to play against my senses. Then his hands followed, drawing down my outer leather with a tiny hint of his movements making their way through the rough armor. I sorely wished that one day I could feel them against my shirt… even to my skin… I sensed an unknown need slip up my throat. A rolling heat that began every time i was aware of his fingers against me, i didn’t want the sensation to end, even rolling over my side and aching the bruise forming invariable along my body. The pain and heat mixed beautifully in my senses, as if the two sensations were closer in relation than I could've known. 

My breathing became hot, degrees of temperature rising in my very core as those digits finally found their positions clutching my hips. The crux of his hand wrapped neatly around my waist with his thumbs pressing into my front just beneath the leather and into the fabric. Had it been intentional? To toy with me so incessantly with just his hands, it wasn’t fair that he was able to produce such a reaction from just caressing me. One of my hands came away from caressing his face to clasp delicately over his, inciting a firm flinch from him as he tried to pull away.

“I’m sorry, did that-”

The way I strongly held on forced him to quiet down, it wasn’t a reaction in pain as he slowly became aware of when I didn't allow him to remove his hand. I have no clue what my intentions were at this point, I just felt hot and that every inch of my body was threatening to spill out. As if I didn’t do something I was going to explode, and that something became evident in the brief seconds after. Drawing my hand off of his to take the base hem of my undershirt, the thick fabric absorbing the suffocating heat beneath. I drew it up just a bit to Naofumi’s surprise, his hand having lifted to allow me whatever I was doing which became strikingly clear as I exposed the stretch of skin beneath where he was holding. The cold night air slicing in without mercy bristling the skin with freckled goosebumps, I could sense a wall of heat and chill battering above my skin. It wasn’t much but I think it was enough, placing my hand atop his once more I pushed him in. Clasping his hand along the breadth of skin exposed from my shirt, the firmness of his hands and texture of his fingers… 

I let out an involuntary sigh, delight mixed with a very powerful joy that almost purred up my throat. I couldn’t hold back anymore as I slowly ebbed back to a muted sense of reason, my eyes fluttering open from a closure I had not willed to voluntarily. I think I may have shut them to enjoy the feeling across my body even more and opening them revealed a very pleasing sight. 

Naofumi Iwatani was blushing, his sharp eyes forced down away from my face as the digits still held to his face had stiffened. No easing caress of my thumb on his cheek as I had escalated the energy in this moment .

_ Do you feel it, Master? _

_ I wonder if you like it… _

The questions were silent but i believe i knew the answer as his fingers explored the small strip of exposed skin. The coarse fingertips gently smoothing me over and over, waves of unfiltered desire being introduced without end. How could either of us stand it… it felt so right.

I resumed the gentle motions on his face, rubbing my thumb over his cheek until the tip of my thumb teased the corner of his mouth. Gently testing its elasticity by drawing the flesh just a bit to the left, his eyes flashing up to mine. He was lost… i mean so was i, but by the moon itself it did not change the fact i was merely following my instincts. 

Shadows suddenly crossed over his face, thick ones, I looked up towards the sky to catch the moon being crossed with clouds. Evidence of a stormy evening ahead of the village, I brought my eyes back to him. The once gleaming moonlight now muted, shadows crossing both of our features I imagine. He lowered himself towards me just slightly but I understood his intention, bringing myself up to press our lips together with one quick peck initially. Pulling away just enough so i could test my own, rolling my tongue out to ensure they weren’t too dry with all my warmth radiating from me. It was so temperate I felt like I could even sweat a bit and that just made me picture my lips as uncomfortably dry or even clammy. 

But they didn’t seem that way so we could continue i think, not like anything would’ve probably stopped us now. 

Naofumi went next as his fingers gripped dangerously tight on my sides, gently nudging me just a bit forward with his arm that inevitably led our lips back together. Except this time Naofumi pushed down into the kiss, tilting his head into my hand as an exchange of heat commenced. It was almost blinding how much his heat melded into my own, it was entirely separate from me but intoxicatingly similar all the while. Like the difference between fire and ice cold water. Same intensity but different sensations. 

This time our lips were playing against each other, grasping and seizing one another in a game almost. Naofumi seemed to naturally take the firm approach while I danced around him, molding ourselves together so much it took the scream within my lungs to realize I hadn't been breathing. Removing myself for a moment to gasp in, mirrored by Naofumi with rough drinks of fresh air. It’s here I found myself completely enveloped in his scent, much like his room, but stronger and more present. Whining slightly I pushed against him again feeling the subtle tickle as his last exhale of air brushed around my lips. I couldn’t get enough… I was simply hungry and finally having that long abated hunger sated. 

I couldn’t remember the moments that we separated but there was suddenly shock from the sense of something hot pushing past my lips. It took me longer than I admit to realize it was his tongue, the surprise washing away as I played up against him. Roughly pulling and maneuvering around him with my own.

It was easy to think for a moment the alcohol may have had something to do with my easiness with all of this, usually I'd be melting from just the idea that I could do this to Naofumi. But i felt incredibly clear headed, as if this was all happening before it happened. We were dancing together, responding with purpose, with equal need. I never imagined that Naofumi would’ve desired any of this but it was as if this was all unlocking something both of us kept hidden. It all just was natural, a slow burning escalation that seems to top itself with every passing second we kissed one another.

That’s when i had another idea… drawing my lips away again, this time the heat cut with the crisp breeze of the evening. Making me draw my lips in to savor every little bit I could.

“Um… Raphtalia..?”

His shape asked me, I memorized his expressions and even the position of his features. It did help that my hand was used as reference with the fingers playing in his hair. But his voice was hushed, softly undercut by the whistling air that caught my ear. Making it twitch in reaction before I moved to respond.

“Yes Naofumi..?”

“Have… you ever kissed someone before?” 

I blinked once, the idea fading just a bit as I had to answer seriously. Shaking my head before reminding myself that we are both shrouded in darkness.

“No, I haven't…”

_ I mean it’s not like i’ve been thinking about this… for a while. _

_ But that’s improper to bring up!!! _

“How… about you?”

I questioned gently, my hand coming down from his face. Testing every inch of him until it came down to his collar, grasping my fingers down around his undershirt letting my fingers test the skin around the base of his neck.

“Once a long time ago.” He muttered, inciting a soft feeling of jealousy.

“In your world?” I questioned and I saw the shape of him nod in response. Well thank gosh it wasn’t here, well with that behind us I slipped my fingers into his shirt bringing him back to kiss me to replace the feeling of jealousy. Rolling into his expression with a renewed vigor, maybe it was a sense of competition or something of that nature but the idea I had still sat there. 

Drawing back though after a few more moments of embracing before leaning in and pecking the corner of his mouth gently. It was gone, the moment and idea fluttering away. Breathing warmly, satisfied totally in this moment but still somewhat desiring more. 

“We should head back before Filo starts worrying…” I spoke up towards him, pulling away now completely. His hands falling away as my shirt slumped back improperly into place, fixing my outfit a bit as I waited for his response.

“Yeah, you’re right.” However he said that but didn’t start moving, mostly still before me with the wind hushed around us. It took an uncomfortably long time for him to breath in and move to speak.

“Is this... us?”

I didn't understand right away and it truly made me pause. Is this us, simple words individually but the way he said it was almost painful, we were not committed yet. Was this all void if it wasn’t said, i drew up close to him again but this time i wrapped my arms around him. Hugging tightly as I laid my head on his chest.

“I think… how about you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a minor interruption


	4. Honesty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of honesty.

The walk leading up to the tent was quiet, nothing said between me and him at the time from the hillside to the dusty streets and finally outside our tent.

All just encased in a wordless stroll set in the evening, then we were stopped with Naofumi moving in first to take the edge of the opening flap with his left hand. Standing just opposing me at the entryway, but he elected to not move further. Words struggling to be spoken as he stood there ahead of me with the soft glow of torchlight flickering over the street beside us both. The fire waved and fluttered with the breeze, casted Naofumi in a struggling orange hue instead of the consistent soft blue from the night sky. Cutting deep into whatever darkness tried to shroud. 

He released the tent flap after more than a moment, what little he pulled open set back into place as he brought his arms to cross over his chest. They both set themselves under his breastplate and caressed the other at the elbow. His fingers gently applying pressure at himself as he tried to come up with words.

At this point I shifted weight fully onto my left foot, staring at him somberly as he struggled. I wanted to save him, but there was too much weight in my throat to speak.

_ “Are you sure..?” _

That’s what he said, point blank into my ear… how could i say absolutely, i thought i had proven myself and my position on the matter.

_ Apparently not… _

Naofumi, surprisingly, had not started speaking yet. But now his arms unfurled themselves from their hold on one another so his left arm could come up and rub the back of his head. The breath that escaped him, the kind that one would let out before beginning speech, it was one that caused an ache within me.

“I-”

He started, but his voice seized up in his throat at the moment he began. The noiselessness made his gaping mouth just a bit more poignant before he gently shut it again. A pained smile pulling across his features as he tried desperately to continue. This was so removed from the man I knew him as, and it was shockingly pleasant to see genuine worry on his face that didn’t really concern… something dangerous. It was just us, worrying about me and him and if this could work or if it was true. The fate of the world not hinging on every syllable, and yet this was the time I saw him truly falter. 

“I am sorry… that I said that.” 

The hand clasped around the back of his neck had stopped it’s incessant rub, instead becoming still.

My eyes drew from his hand across the features of his face, following a natural line to his eyes as they watched the ground between us both. Perhaps there was too much between us, perhaps there was no getting past the barriers he erected to deal with this exact thing. Kissing in the evening isn’t exactly an admission of anything permanent, which hurt me to say, but it was simply realistic. I wanted it to mean everything, and for a brief instant it was, if only we could stop time so i could remain locked against him forever. 

It was here that my side started up again, seizing further up with a blinding burn of pain. I winced before him but I think he was too consumed with his thoughts to notice, I went to move towards him but as I raised my left arm the pain grew too much for me to bear silently. A tiny huff slipping out just loud enough to grab his attention, in my pain I instinctively reached to grasp my left arm to steady it. 

_ Keep movement to an absolute minimum… _

“Raphtalia?” His voice sounded out again, but this time I silenced him. Putting whatever concern he had to rest with my right hand holding my position for only a moment so I could catch my breath. I stepped forward, careful not to adjust my side in any way before reaching out to poke the gem sitting centerpiece in his chestplate. Trailing the deep purple edges with my nail, toying with the barely evident seam between metal and stone. It was ebbing a rage filled power, it made me uneasy to be sure but for some reason that feeling made me resolve.

“Do you remember what i told you?” His head turned inquisitively down towards me as I sounded out those words, trying to place the context of that statement in the short pause I took. “I told you… I’d be your sword  _ forever _ , that doesn’t mean sometimes… that means forever, no matter what.” My hand stopped trailing the gem on his chest and I let my hand flatten against it. Palming the somewhat cold metal, covering the gem in my fingers. “It won’t matter how you feel about me… in that way or any way, I won't ever stray from your side Master Naofumi.”

I looked up to him now, smiling softly… knowing that my words were true. I don’t need him to love me, I don't even need him to like me. I want him to know that, whatever circumstances and wherever they lead us, I would be at his side no matter if I was only his friend. Or if i was his daughter, his slave, if i meant nothing at all. “I just didn’t want to live a life where I wasn’t completely honest with you, it tends to muddle everything… right?”

“Living?” He quipped weakly, the line meant to entice a lighter tone but his arms coming down from the tensed position he was holding. Only told me that it was an instinct to say something like that. Looking at me with a somber expression that only served to contrast the weak smile on his lips.

“Master Naofumi…” I uttered, still taking a somewhat firm tone, trying to bring the topic back into the spotlight.

“I know, I know… secrets tend to muddle everything.” I nodded along and let a soft chuckle slip through, content with this evening. Even if it didn’t truly mean that i was Naofumi’s and he was mine, at least we were… closer than before. “I would’ve found out eventually… you being a bad liar and all.”

“Maaaassssteerrr!” I didn’t even have time to be annoyed with his joke because as if on cue the voice of Filo cut out from inside the tent. The flap opening with a soft woosh and there she was. Rubbing her eye and looking out at both of us standing just outside. In the brief moments that followed her uncovered eye snapped to the sight of my hand placed against Naofumi, which I quickly dropped in response but it simply wasn’t fast enough.

“Hey! Why are you getting lovely with Master!” I felt the childish reaction bubble out before I could even begin to stop myself.

“I am not!” The heat rose up my neck as I spoke down towards her.

“You are to, don’t lie!” Filo huffed, stomping her foot in frustration at my denial. Her cowlick danced very firmly in response to her words. “I saw you touching his armor, and you two have been gone all night!” 

“Filo, that’s enough, you’re both being too loud.” Naofumi interjected, turning so he was facing the young queen who puffed her cheeks out in response. His gaze turned to me only briefly before facing her again. “Raphtalia and I were only doing a patrol, we got caught up by a monster. We didn’t mean to be gone for so long.” It seemed that in particular grabbed Filo’s attention, her face turning to that of concern rather than anger before having to move herself from the entrance to allow Naofumi to enter. I followed in behind him as a soreness I wasn’t prepared for slowly and continuously rose up my side. Getting me to instinctively grasp my injury to steady myself. Extremely careful not to apply the slightest pressure to the area as the two continued off to my right.

“Was it a big monster Master, are you both okay?” The questions had already started rattling off in a familiar fashion.

“Nothing we couldn’t handle ourselves… Raphtalia got struck pretty hard so we are going to have to check on h-” I had only reached partway to my bed before hearing that, turning towards them both feeling flushed.

“Master Naofumi I told you I’m fine!” I felt my tail fluff up defensively, my ears feeling peaked even as I saw him watching me from just the other side of the tent. Filo watched me too as I stood there… clutching my injury. 

“Raphtalia you’re still bad at lying…” Filo said, shattering what little I had put into that deception as Naofumi watched me with a mixture of worry and amusement. I looked away from them both and huffed, defeated entirely as I sauntered over to my bed. Crossing around and taking an unsteady seat on my cot as I heard the two of them talking once more.

“Filo would you mind terribly to grab some medical bandages from the storehouse uptown? They are probably strong enough to deal with whatever injury she got.” I unclasped my hand from my side, drawing it up to start at my armor. Tugging the bindings loose very carefully as to not irritate anything.

“Sure thing Master!” I heard her feet pattering off before stopping just short of the entrance. “Be back in a jiffy Raphtalia!” I gave her a small wave with my movable hand before I heard the tent flap open. Signaling the young queen had disappeared off from the area. But I just kind of had to continue to sit, unable to shrug off my body armor because of the pain. At this point it seemed impossible to even adjust my left side in the slightest, like the muscle itself was restraining my movements. The armor slumped out, loose on me, The leather binding unraveling around me like a bandage. With it now hanging off of me it seemed my side finally soothed just a bit, perhaps I should stop tightening it as much as I have been, something I noted before Naofumi finally came over. Dressed casually with the medicinal almanac over his arm, he moved to my front, looking down at me now completely marked in worry.

“Did you think i would forget?” He said somberly, kneeling down so we were eye to eye as I replied towards him.

“Hardly… just thought I'd spare you one evening in having to take care of me.” I felt a weak chuckle slip out after my words and even that tiny expression suddenly pulled hot iron on the inside of my torso. Clutching my right hand uselessly around the blanket on top of my bed, my knuckles going white around the bundle of fabric as the heat rolled in waves up my body.

“That’d be the day…” He said gently, those eyes finally coming to the sight of my loose armor. “Do you need help?” He asked and I merely nodded in response, the shame of not being able to even draw my armor off not lost to me. Watching him without hesitation to lean forward, reaching his arms around me to fully undo the tightener at my back. Working around my lazy tug and pulling on the twine with expert hands, it would’ve been exceptional if my side wasn’t screaming at me. The chest piece had to go first, seeing as it was hugging me together, most of the armor pieces being left respectively on a floor mat I had set out explicitly for the set. Naofumi had to stop repeatedly so I could be eased out with as least uncomfort as possible. But before I even realized he had set my gauntlets off alongside the rest, leaving me in my plain clothes. I had no obvious cuts or open wounds as told to me after his cursory inspection, gentle questions following to determine some idea of what had happened.

“I think you probably had your ribs cracked…” He muttered towards me, much to my chagrin.

“That would explain why it hurts so much to laugh.” I joked softly, getting him to smirk just slightly as he came up with a treatment in his head. I had that moment of guilt playing inside, causing trouble for him just didn’t sit well. “I’m… sorry.”

“Hey. None of that, we’ve all made mistakes and we look out for each other.” He said with a surprising amount of intensity in his throat, those eyes of his meeting mine to ensure I understood. I sighed softly into his gaze, unable to really settle down my unease even with his firm expression. I didn’t want to think it was necessary, but it was. Having to see him before me, tending to me like he always had and never expecting more than a recovery. 

I hated the imbalance.

I hated that at the end of the day I had nothing to give him. Except maybe my love, but marked with his hesitation I couldn't know if he wanted that, at least from me. It felt terrible, the idea that Naofumi didn’t love me back or didn’t feel comfortable loving me that way, he had kissed me. Intensely so, but was that just human desire, was he starved for physical attention that he couldn’t resist the temptation even if it was with someone he didn’t love. If that were the case could he just see me as someone using him, this was all my paranoia bundling out to drown the physical pain. But that realization didn’t make it easier.

Then his expression faltered, a soft cascade of failing muscle structure that started from the corner of his eye. Traveling its way down his cheek until that somewhat stoic expression had turned into a frown. His eyes refused to meet mine properly now, repeatedly glancing away and off at something else. He pulled back from me with his hands securely set against the other in front of himself, he looked like he wanted to speak again but he kept pushing it away. 

He shook his head once and spoke out towards the ground, refusing to look at my face. “Do… would you mind.. If..” He trailed off momentarily, growling something under his breath before sitting up straight to look at me. “I have to get a look at your side… could you lift up… your shirt?” He asked it but it was undeniably strained. As if the air was strangling itself as it left up his throat, my eyes widened and I felt a resurfacing heat on my face as his own expression turned to that of a soft rose. He was flustered... which was apparent as his gaze once more tried to trail away from me, he looked cute like this. It took everything in me not to reach out for him in that moment, feeling a need to succumb to instinct once more. 

I huffed out instead, the rush of emotions fading and slowly replaced with amusement. I suspect that he was kneeling there thinking along very similar lines to me, contemplating the meaning of our new relationship, if it could be considered a new beginning. All in all the implications of moving clothing held a very different feeling now. Well more so for him than myself, but even i had to admit the energy had definitely shifted from what i was accustomed to. Perhaps it was time to play with that little bit of embarrassment in this moment, maybe that would serve in lightening both of our moods.

  
“I am truly flattered…” I started, trying to resist the urge to laugh at his rather blunt way of asking that particular question. “But Master Naofumi… how would I ever regain my honor?” I said that intentionally softly, looking down at him with a face I tried ever so much to come off as suggestive. It seemed to work since his face pulled back into a familiar unamused expression, I tried to hide my glee but it was all for naught. Seeing his eyes wrinkle up with annoyance and his voice grumbling just under my range of hearing. It was like we were normal again, before a lot of things changed. Following that by something I could hear.

“You know what i am saying.” He grouched.

“Yes I do.” I said with a slight airiness to my tone. But then a sudden silence overtook the space between us, drawing the once flustered and amused air into a quiet eeriness. I couldn’t properly describe it if i even wanted to, it was just empty, reminding us both of how different it all felt. Him waiting for me to say something and me waiting for him. 

“Well...:” He started, rolling the word just slightly slower on his tongue as if to extend the noise past its due end. Cutting out the awkwardness with even more awkwardness. But I suppose that was my cue to move along.

“Right, shirt.” I moved my right hand down along the hem, rolling my fingers just under the edge of the fabric to roll it up. Using only one hand was kind of weird, but I managed and before long I had the shirt drawn up just under my chest. Exposing the side of myself burning in pain, it was as if the whole of my left side was bound in a mechanical vice. Squeezing on my ribs with every subtle twist or shift, burning pain interlaced with ache that never seemed to end. 

Even the brush of my clothing was excruciating, I don't even know how I managed to last so long without collapsing. I mean he had pressed me there and if this instance was anything to go on it should’ve made me scream. Maybe it was excitement, clouding my nerves and it was genuinely worrying if it made me that blind to pain. How close were the two sensations if one could blot out the other? 

Naofumi didn’t speak, his eyes just trailing up the breadth of my side over and over. Enough to make me feel more like a slab of meat at the butchers rather than anything like a patient.

“Eh… Master Naofumi?” I muttered out, catching his attention from my injury. He looked up and I saw his eye flicking back just briefly before his full expression was given to me. “How.. how does it look?” I asked calmly, if I had a rib sticking out of my side I was sure to notice soon enough, but honestly it was nerve racking to imagine a wound along with this pain. Was my rib cage caved in like an empty sack? Filling my internals with bone shrapnel and slowly bleeding me out from the inside as I sat here. I proceeded to only feel more and more queasy as my paranoia overcame my reasoning, preferring much more to get an answer from Naofumi.

“Well you’re definitely bruised.” He stated rather simply. I looked down at him for his rather blase assessment, my gaze all that was needed to tell him I wasn't pleased. He huffed quietly out of his nose, shrugging his shoulders at me. “I mean… there really isn’t anything more beyond that.”   
  
That mostly placated the paranoia, but now the curiosity set in. Craning my head forward so i could peer down at myself better, only to see a roundish blob of discoloration marking my side, almost assuredly the beginnings of a massive bruise. It was darkened around the edges but slowly tanned as it came down into itself, almost like a rippling puddle of skin along my body. 

“If i wasn’t able to move myself i would think this was kind of neat.” I muttered softly, mostly to myself since it was a little strange to describe your rib cracking side as ‘neat.’ I turned back to Naofumi, who had not only been watching my face but also had his face screwed up with something like frustration.

“I’m sorry.” He said firmly, no inflection and no emotion flashing in his eyes at that, just a simply stated apology directed up at me.

“Hey, look who’s apologizing now.” I smiled down at him, tilting my head in curiosity at what brought that on. He looked away, clearly upset. I let my expression fade, huffing quietly to myself as a minor feeling of distress marked me when I saw him in need. I just felt like holding him now, but something told me that wasn’t what he wanted. Plus i think i would agitate the angry heat at my side. “Naofumi…” I started, unable to know what I could say to rouse him from whatever pit he was digging for himself.

“It’s hard.” He said, gritting his expression tightly from the side profile I saw. 

“What is?” I questioned softly.

“E-everything i suppose, this life… this village, this world.” He stopped short of letting his words spill out, instead refocusing himself with a deep sigh that barely shuddered in past his lips. 

_ I’ve been waiting for this… _

“I think the worst, all the time, even when everything is… calm.” His expression softened, those green eyes blinking open now. Tenderly gleaming with emotion, it was… breathtaking. “I imagine the day when I won’t be… adequate. When all the preparation and effort i put forward just wasn’t good enough. I dread the moment… I… don’t want to fail you and Filo.” He finished softly, drawing it out with a breath. I just kind of sat there and let him speak his mind, the candidness of his fears and thoughts being both a treat and a worrying insight. “If you were to… i don’t think i could stop myself, what good is the Shield Hero if i couldn’t…” 

“Then we will get stronger.” 

“If that’s not enough?”

“It will be…” At that I reached forward with my hand to gently touch the side of his face, his flesh felt cold against my fingertips.

“... I want to think that too.” He sighed, leaning in to rest his head closer to my digits. “But then it’s always just one mistake… that’s all it takes to lose everything.”

“Yeah…” I said, now he drew fully into my hand. Resting his head in my grip as I gently stroked my thumb along his cheek. “But we have to risk it, if things are going to get better.” 

“When you’re wounded, when I see you get hurt. I can’t help but feel guilty about putting you in danger.” I don’t know what brought on his honesty, but it hurt to think of all the times something happened that he was truly worried. Bottling in his feelings so he could do something… honestly i had no idea what good could come from hiding your true feelings. “I can’t let anything happen to you, I have to protect you. You deserve… you deserve to live a life that’s happy and not all… this.” 

“What do you mean, this is the life I chose, remember?” Naofumi sighed and nodded into my hand. “You wouldn’t force me to fight, this was all my decision, these wounds are my decision.”

“I’m scared…” He said weakly, those words rumbled along and ebbed up my arm, shivering emotions vibrating up my spine. “Terrified really... I don’t want to lose you.”

“It's okay to be scared.” I whispered to him, more mouthing it then actually speaking. “Being scared is just a way… to… know who you are.”

I’m paraphrasing my Father there, it felt so appropriate at the time. But I couldn't help but feel a little lost now as the man I loved knelt before me and let me stroke his cheek while he told me just how terrified he was of the worst possibilities. Of losing who he is. Of losing me or Filo.

“That I am weak?” He chuckled out, only getting a soft tap of disappointment from my hand against him for that.

“That you’re caring… that you have something to fight for.” I replied to only have Naofumi’s hand reach up without warning to hold itself over my own against his face. His hand was warm, contrasting the coolness of his cheek ensuring the strange equilibrium of body heat.

“... Something to fight for.” He mimicked me, pausing momentarily. “Or  _ someone _ ?” He wasn’t looking at me when he said it, but the  _ way  _ he said it. What else could it mean, had I actually… done this… Everything started racing. My heart and my breathing, my tail started to idly sweep over the top of my bed as he held me against him. His fingers closed around the top of my hand, enticing a gentle squeak from me as he leaned over and kissed the inside of my palm. It was so sudden that i couldn’t really sense all the little deviations in his expression. Just delightfully tempered lips against the softness of my hand, the breathing and subtle moisture disappearing all too quickly as Naofumi sat up and leaned forward. Drawing those lips to my now assuredly flushed expression to gently kiss my forehead. 

“I-I don’t know anything about  _ that _ Naofumi…”

“Thank you Raphtalia.” He almost hummed it against my head, getting my ears to perk up in attention as I gave a soft huff of affirmation in response. Not having the words to respond properly to such… genuine gratitude. He pulled away, still somewhat holding my hand before glancing over at my side once more.

“I don’t know if healing magic will fix them completely, you still might need to rest before you could do anything strenuous.” Then it was back to the matter at hand, hands still held together as he was talking though. So progress, he leaned in. Reaching his free hand out to hover just above my skin. “Heal.” He muttered softly, the warm expression of magic washing over my side made me sigh out in delight. I could feel the spell work its way into my bones, stitching the cracks and mending the bruising. The spell fizzled out after a few more moments of warmth, leaving that once cavernous bruise healed. Soft impressions marking out the previous territory of the injury, i brought my left hand up to softly stroke along the skin. 

It was markedly better, finally allowing me to breathe leagues more than just a moment ago. I proceeded firstly to roll my left shoulder, feeling the seizing resistance from before almost completely gone now, which was in of itself truly reassuring. Somewhat amazed by the effectiveness of healing magic as I looked to him with a grin. 

“Thank you Naofumi.”

“Just be careful alright, for me?” He asked. 

“I’ll be careful Master.” I was lying… I’d definitely find something dangerous to do, it was almost too predictable.

“I mean it Raphtalia…” His hand squeezed on mine and this time I chuckled without the fear of ache following behind. Putting up my free hand defensively as I spoke.

“I’m almost completely certain that you do Master Naofumi.” It was then he finally released me, moving his hands to his hips with a huff. Understanding completely that I was keen on doing  _ something _ despite his reservations at the prospect. Grumbling before getting up and away from me to stare at the entrance of the tent, moving around my bed to stand closer to the entryway. His foot tapping against the ground as he moved to speak.

“What is taking Filo so long..?”

“I’m baaaack!” 

_ I swear she has the weirdest perfect timing. _

The young Filolial burst in through the tent flap only to see me and Naofumi looking directly at her. She was carrying a bundle of bandage rolls, the prepared ones that we made for the infirmary. But it was clear the sight of both of us already looking at her had activated some weird self preservation instinct because she started to whine a little bit in place. “Is something wrong?” She asked firstly, Naofumi, looking back to me only to meet an expression as confused as his. “Is Raphtalia dying?”

“What?” I said out loud, not really understanding the course of thought that would’ve led her to that conclusion. Naofumi chuckled as he looked back at her.

“No one’s dying, her wounds had to be healed with magic so we won’t be needing those.”

“So i went out there for nothing!” She said puffing her cheeks out as the bundle of bandages lost one of its rolls. Falling to the very unsanitary floor. Her anger only made me laugh on my side of the room, and that only served in getting her eyes to glare at me. “Raphtalia!” She said shrily, trying to get me to stop myself. But seeing her cute face grow multiple shades of red as my enjoyment embarrassed her, it was too much for me. I only managed to pull it back to an amused snicker, covering my grin with my hand.

“Yes you got them for nothing.” Naofumi was shaking his head as he moved over to where Filo stood, bending over to scoop up the lost bandage and huffing quietly. Looking at her for just a moment before he knelt down in front of her, the frustrated filolial still somewhat pouting as he did so. “I’m sorry about that Filo, would you mind terribly to bring these all back to the storeroom again?”

“B-but Master…” The frustration on her features faded, replaced with mild annoyance but with Naofumi’s apology seemed to soften the blow. “Okay…” she murmured finally, turning away and slipping out of the tent for the second time. As the two of them spoke I took the opportunity to stand up from my cot and move over to the front of the tent that Naofumi and I now occupied alone. He stood up with the bandage and turned to only see me standing beside him with a low smile.

“Putting her to work huh?” I spoke out softly, only because the atmosphere was so gentle that it felt awkward to speak at a higher volume than this. Naofumi just shrugged, tossing the bandage out of his hand and onto his own cot. Moving along after it before taking a seat on his bedding. 

“I suppose, I almost feel bad about it.” He said dryly, looking at the ground for a moment before turning to look up towards me. Maybe he was searching for my reaction, or maybe… he was waiting for something. I don’t know, that expression was so confusing as I watched him. “Um… i don’t really know what to do with this.” He said as he reached back around himself for the tainted bandage, holding it up in his left hand. I don’t know why but i suddenly had the urge to sit beside him, inching over quickly as I spoke towards him.

“We could just throw it away…” As I plopped myself down alongside him he didn’t even seem to react to it. Just staring at the roll in his hand with his bottom lip somewhat sticking in his mouth, it seemed like he was chewing his lip a bit in thought. He looked over at me as he released it and at this distance I could see the gentle indentations marking that corner of his mouth. Assumedly from where his teeth were setting themselves. I don’t know why I focused on that but it must've been quite obvious as Naofumi cleared his throat down at me. Getting me to look up at him again. 

“That seems wasteful Raphtalia.” He said, those eyes of his blinking down towards me. 

_ What is even happening right now?! _

_ Should we kiss… should we…  _

I felt like panicking, the rampant internal desire playing along to the drum in my chest. I couldn’t decipher the implications as my eyes kept switching to his lips and his eyes, we only had so much time and with every second that something didn’t happen I felt my heart seize up. Perhaps he felt the same since he was still as well, the two of us totally blind in what we could even do. I scooted myself just a hair closer, feeling the sides of our legs now brushing alongside one another. Even with just that small closeness I felt my tail starting to sway deftly behind myself, unintentionally brushing the tip of it against Naofumi’s back. His gaze shifted ever so slightly so he could glance back towards the traitorous extension of myself. Finding my expression again to undoubtedly see the gentle heat on my face. 

“What’re you happy about?” He asked suddenly, getting me to blink and turn away from his eyes. Willing my tail into my lap so I could hold it down securely. 

“I-I don’t think… it’s that exactly…” It felt off when described that way, as I held my tail down. Facing ahead towards Filo’s cot on the other side of the room, then drifting to the left towards my own bed before coming to look down at my lap. My ears flattened a bit as shame filled me, which was weird to feel if I was being honest. “I think… I’m excited?” I questioned out, looking up from my lap to focus on the burlap wall ahead of me. The word didn’t come out right, none of these thoughts or feelings made sense. It all just kind of bundled together into a disgusting mess of emotions, my entire form feeling like it could give out under the weight.

“Oh…” He let out, his tone a mixture of what I assumed was surprise and a minor touch of… nervousness? It was extremely hard to tell, Naofumi shifted slightly and that got me to turn towards him to only catch him crossing his legs tightly together. His face marked in a suddenly sharp rose coloring. He huffed out a breath that seemed to be hot on the air, it was much cooler now but even still it seemed like the both of us were overheating. Then I had a question in my throat, a sudden one.

“Naofumi?” I said gently, getting him to look at me again. His breathing was suddenly much more firm. “Are… you scared right now?” He moved to speak, his mouth hanging open for just a moment. In that time I released my eager tail, freeing it to lash delicately behind me once more. No words came out though, so he just kind of sat there as his eyes pondered over what he could say. Wandering off for a second before coming back to look at me, letting a softer exhale escape before shutting his mouth. His throat shifted as he swallowed hard in front of me, his actions mirrored the stifling fear that I had felt time and time again. He nodded, as he tried to come up with something to say again. 

“I don’t think that exactly covers it…” He almost whispered it. His eyes switched from mine to my lips, I could almost feel his gaze rolling over my features and it made me feel amazing. “I think… i’m excited too… and nervous.” At that I gulped, getting him to refocus on my eyes. Naofumi reached back and set the bandage down on his pillow. Before mirroring me in placing both his hands in his lap, but with that admission I knew what I wanted to do next. I moved my right hand over. Barely touching along the edge of his hand closest to me, subtly tapping along his skin to suggest to him. Which he took in stride as he flipped his hand over, allowing me to secure our hands in a firm embrace. Stroking my thumb over the back of his hand as the heat between them almost instantly felt too warm. But it didn’t dissuade me from continuing to hold him.

“I understand…” I whispered up to him, and maybe that was his cue to move ahead. Seeing as his free hand came up to cup softly against my cheek, his fingers slipping beneath my hair and nestling fully alongside my face. Our expressions were locked together, unfaltering and full of so much fear and joy… it all made sense and was so damn confusing at the same time. It was then that I reached up with my own hand to feel up against his on my face, now feeling completely locked with him at this moment in time.

He then leaned down, inching forward as he kept checking me for any signs of discomfort as I kept practically begging internally for him to pick up the pace. But i didn’t even realize it when he kissed me, it was just there, and we were just there kissing again. It felt… different from before… I couldn’t explain it but I could sense it was better. More fulfilling, at least to me, Naofumi had the strangest feel to him with a warm blend of dry and gentle heat marking out the details of his mouth against mine. I wondered how I felt to him, did he find it intoxicating like me?

He readjusted himself against me and tilted his head a bit, sinking our lips together more firmly than before but still maintaining that unfamiliar, pleasant feeling. I shut my eyes just in time to feel him pull away from me, his breath chilling along my lips with a trembling pattern. I didn’t want to open my eyes just yet, just enjoying his breathing so close to me was something I wanted to memorize. I don’t know how that one kiss could feel so different and unique compared to earlier, but it was something i wanted to keep happening. 

I opened my eyes to find his sharp green watching me, our gazes meeting on instinct. I felt a smile appear on my face without any will of my own and his own smile appeared in response. His thumb started stroking along my cheek, rolling the print across, allowing me to savor the most minute detail. 

“You’re beautiful.” He said, those words of praise washing over me. Getting me to grow even more embarrassed than i already was.

“Naofumi…” I hissed out, feeling a pout forming on my face and he chuckled softly at that. I removed my hand from holding him against my features, that hand gently moving to stroke my entire face. 

“Did I say something wrong Raphtalia?” He spoke with a smile, one that repeatedly tried to infect me with a similar expression.

“No… but i can’t-” He interrupted me with a kiss, a soft one that just surprised me. “Naofumi-” I protested softly before he did it again. This went on every time i tried to talk, any protest being cut short and even sometimes before i could even think of a response. Then the time came where I felt completely out of breath, huffing in cool drinks of air as he chuckled down at my flushed expression. He squeezed my hand firmly with his to get my attention again, I felt my mouth purse involuntarily. Having grown to expect it in this moment of embarrassing kissing, not receiving anything I felt a whine slip from my throat at him. I let my eyes open to watch him with a disappointed expression as I hadn't received a kiss yet. His face was a blend of harsh red and amused enjoyment. 

“What Raphtalia?” He asked expectantly, his hand slipping down from my face until his fingers caressed the edge of my jaw. Holding my angled expression before he continued. “Were you expecting-” It was my turn to silence him, slipping in without so much as a warning. Trapping whatever snarkiness he had in his mouth, then I drew away just barely to speak against his lips.

“I love you.” It was barely audible but he undoubtedly heard it. His form stiffened up in response and I pulled away just so I could watch his expression as it moved into a mix of embarrassment and panic. I’m almost certain he’s seen this exact look on me a million times, so getting to return the favor was the best thing I could’ve done. “Is there something you want to say to that, Naofumi?” I gently teased, still keeping the distance between us minimal. 

“I love you too.” No jokes, no flighty tone. No interruptions and no pain. His words were incredibly soft between just us, his eyes kept searching every inch of my face. Like he was trying to memorize this moment just like myself, but honestly everything else lost its punch after those words escaped us both. His hand squeezed securely around mine and I returned the favor in kind, tightly gripping each other to ensure we both understood what this meant. A new relationship between us, one set on equal ground and trust… not to mention love. 

_ Was everything okay now? _

_ What did the future hold for the both of us, did it mean struggling and fear, did it mean sadness and anger?  _

I didn’t have the answers and I suspect Naofumi didn’t either. It was clear that things couldn’t always be happy like this. 

_ Maybe we shouldn’t worry about the things we can’t control. _

_ Just enjoy the time we possess right now.  _

_ For however long it lasts. _


	5. A New Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Living out a new day.

When I woke up I found myself staring at the top of the tent with a dry grogginess stinging in my eyes, they struggled to open for just a moment. The low light of the tent was still enough to cause me to wince as my eyes adjusted. Immediately following that i felt a soft struggling yawn force its way up my throat, stretching my jaw open with a soft vocalization sounding out as i did so. Everything always felt stiff in the morning so from there I moved to stretch my legs and by extension my feet. Before slipping my hands out above me to relish in the feeling of the muscles extending and twisting once more.

It was almost always refreshing to do that in the morning, but then it occurred to me that i was sleeping on my back, quickly sitting up on my cot to release my tail. Having been trapped between my lower back and the bed for however long, grumbling gently when an entire half of it was matted down. Stroking my fingers along it to fluff out the fur as I inched over to swing my legs over the edge of my bed. Finding my shoes exactly where I left them last night, I rested my feet against them as I fluffed my tail with one hand. Using the free one to start brushing through my hair to stroke out any possible knots I could before properly brushing it later on in my morning. For the most part this was the same as any other morning that could be described. 

Save for one tiny, little, truly insignificant detail. I smelt faintly like Master Naofumi… my hair slinging hand caught a particularly firm knot and I huffed out as the hairs were drawn painfully together. Saving that one for the brush i drew my hand back to my shirt as i peeled the top closer to my nose so i could ensure that is what i was smelling. Sure enough it was his signature on my clothing, maybe it was the hugging… It was almost funny to me how natural it felt. Any embarrassment was reserved for a moment where I wasn't playing back the memory of last night. My gaze drifted up from my shirt to look towards his form away on his cot, sleeping soundly it seemed. I could make out the tuft of dark hair sticking up where the pillow was, his entirety covered by a soft blanket.

Our moment ended with a firm hug to one another, the kissing was all well and good and he even left me one on my cheek. But honestly i was so nervous and unaware of my own exhaustion that almost the second i laid down i was asleep. I don’t think either of us had the energy to continue beyond that, emotionally at the time I felt drained and physically I think I was on the brink of passing out, which is obvious now. The healing magic did good work, but I think there was much my body was dealing with before that.

With that thought I released my tail to softly smooth out the top of my bedding with its repeated sway, moving my newly freed hand to grasp softly at my side. Testing to ensure that the pain was gone, it was, i don’t know why i felt the need to check to spite the sensation of  _ not _ feeling like my rib was jutting out. With that all firmly established in my head I let my eyes drift over to Filo’s cot, she hadn’t made it back when I passed out but seeing her giant fluffy filolial self napping away was evidence enough. Releasing my shirt I breathed in sharply, unconsciously not taking into account the scent of a giant feathered creature as a lungful of fowl entered my nose. I almost choked out of surprise, it was not as if i wasn’t used to it but it was firmly implanting itself in what used to be just my tent. 

_ I bet she hasn’t been washing her feathers like we told her to… _

I shook the displeasure from myself before drawing up my shirt once more to clear my senses. Replacing the smell of large fowl with the smell of Naofumi, it was a markedly improved distinction with this one smelling vaguely of grass and some type of wood. Earthy yet still clean, undertones of rock maybe? My nose wasn’t anything near perfect to distinguish everything individually, but I wasn't shy to admit that my hearing and sense of smell were somewhat more sensitive. I drew myself up from my bed, slipping my shoes on with little effort as to not dirty them when I moved across the tent to the entryway. From the small opening along the edge I could feel a chilled morning breeze wafting in, a gentle greyish light pouring in after it.

I drew the flap open to let in some fresh air, the battling interior atmosphere of the tent and the chilled exterior was a refreshing feeling. Pinning the flap before backing away to bask in my success of airing out, it took me a second to realize that this particular morning was foggy. Not to mention the usually salt heavy air was toned with the smell of fresh rain. 

_ Oh… those storm clouds from last night… _

It was so naturally humid that waking up wasn’t enough to tell the change in density to the air, anyway this will narrow down a lot of the day's tasks. I found my eyes switching over towards Naofumi again, It was rare for me to be up earlier than him. Then before I even realized it I was over by his side, watching him sleep with the blanket drawn over his face. He looked… content, and i almost felt bad as i knelt down and stuck my hand along the top of his messy hair. Gently scratching my fingers in his locks as I whispered.

“Naofumi…” The first call didn’t do anything more that make his unconscious self murmur something in return. So i called once more, getting his eyes to open lazily towards me, their sharp color taking a moment to adjust to the soft foggy light that cut in. He grumbled again, his eyes shutting as he did so. “Master… it's time to get up.” I said with a slightly more stern tone, leaning a bit so i could move my other hand up to cup his cheek. Drawing a tiny circle along his features with my fingertips as he sighed out, nodding once before he parted his lips to speak.

“Get ready… I’m up.” 

“Want me to wake up Filo?” He shook his head at that and huffed. “Okay, don’t fall back asleep on me Master.” I say with a low tease as my eyes glanced warily towards Filo. I’d rather avoid the drama of Filo seeing me pet Naofumi like this… speaking of, it was extremely gratifying. Dragging the tips of my nails to test against his hair, and as i pulled away i even saw the minor displeasure on his face. He must’ve been really lacking sleep; he was usually the early riser of us three but evidently that duty fell to me.

I stood watching him for just a moment until his arms came up to peel off his covers. That just left me getting ready, taking my leave from Naofumi’s side of the tent. I would go on about my daily routine.

Not a lot had changed from yesterday’s patrol to this one, I couldn’t quite label exactly what could’ve been different but it just like something  _ should _ be. We walked the same route, talked to the same assigned patrolmen from yesterday morning and not to mention made note of various things throughout. Naofumi’s outwardly disposition had hardly taken a blow as we walked, commenting on things needed to be worked on. His dialogue holding that same dry objective tone as he stood besides me, I don’t know why that was moderately upsetting.

Even the morning air seems to develop this ethereal quality around the town, bathing everything in an eerie magical grey glow. But any possible wonder to be gleaned from that was mostly ignored by my Master, and beyond that there was nary an indication that last night even  _ happened _ . Everything just seemed to act like the same old tried and true routine… we came upon the eastern positioned edge of town. Towards inland where that sickle-swept tree on the hill was hiding further out in the dense fog.

_ Were we to act like nothing happened..? _

_ What kind of relationship is that?! _

_ Hiding ourselves isn’t a way to live! _

Of course I couldn’t say that’s what was exactly happening at the time, it just all felt kind of awkward to walk around the same as we had always done. Naofumi was gazing off into the fog, assumedly checking stats once again as I twisted towards him.

We were practically alone in this part of town, being one of the furthest from the town center it was least prioritized on the lists of repairs. So the most interruption we could expect was maybe a patrolman or possibly a wandering newcomer.

“Mm… Master Naofumi?” I spoke very softly, so that anything that could be said was washed away by the morning wind. He had his hand drawn up to his chin as he inspected whatever before him. His eyes flashed over for a moment before realization came over him.

Blinking once he gave me his attention as I stood there, in the moment I brought my hands back behind myself. Slightly twisting in place as a nervous sensation drew up my legs, an itch that was fairly similar to my want to travel again. But this time it was slightly more painful, enough to get me to press the calves of my legs together to try and ebb out the feeling. 

Noticing my pause, Naofumi started. “What is it Raphtalia?” He spoke so rudely I almost scowled, but instead my dissatisfaction came out as a scoff.

“Well… I was thinking.” that got him to hum towards me, “Well… what did you think of last night?” At that point my hands came undone and nestled themselves on my hips. Feeling my tail sway idly.

Then Naofumi’s face screwed up like he tasted something sour.

“Don’t look at me like that after I ask you something!” I felt embarrassment roar up my body.

“W-well what am I supposed to say!?” He cried out in response, we were probably louder than intended honestly. But I couldn’t contain myself and it seemed neither could Naofumi. “Raphtalia… is this really the time to discuss this?” He deflated following his initial outburst.

“Discuss what, I’m just asking…” what  _ was _ I asking though? I guess I just wanted to confirm if things were different. “What…” Naofumi raised his eyebrow as my words failed me again, I could feel his patience wearing thin. But I didn’t know if it was annoyance, fear or even excitement. Furthermore exactly who those emotions were directed towards, me or himself. 

I felt my face turning a heated color as the question I wanted to ask appeared on my tongue. I almost said it too, out loud, there on the foggy street.

“Hero, sir!” But unfortunately a voice cut out from the edge of the fog, followed by the sight of a young human man. The same one who was passing out the drinks last night, he had to be new because his face only sparked that one little memory. I don’t remember seeing him when we were registering the newcomers… I’d have to remember to get his name.

The boy stopped dead in his tracks as he saw me though, probably because when I heard his footsteps interrupting me and Naofumi I had snapped my gaze in his direction. An expression of fear etched on his made me realize that my gaze was less than hospitable. 

I muttered out an apology as I turned to face him completely along with Naofumi, who came up to my side before clearing his throat. Whatever we had to talk about sitting on the back of our minds at the moment. 

“My apologies Sir Hero, Miss Raphtalia… but…” the boy continued, his face marked with a red flush. I imaginde he was running all over town to find us. I went to speak but Naofumi cut out just ahead of me. 

“What is it?”

“Well… the monster you had some of the workers take care of?”

“Out with it!” Master suddenly said sharply and I gazed over at him, his face suddenly marked in real anger. I couldn’t imagine why at the time… but I think it was a mix of frustration and rage towards the creature itself.

“W-well, Hero sir, the… big bird-?”

“Filo.” I interjected and he nodded his thanks at my clarification.

“Well… it found the body and started eating it.” He finished, pulling a hand back to rub his head.

I glanced over at Naofumi, whose expression had softened a bit as he crossed his arms towards the other man. “Well as long as the body is disposed of that’s all I care about.” Something about that piqued my interest so I turned towards him.

“Shouldn’t we let the Shield absorb some of its parts, Master Naofumi?” His lips from where I saw curled a bit to a low smile.

“I already got what I needed last night.” Something about that… why the hell did that sound so suggestive!? I didn’t remember him stripping it for parts but it was possible I could’ve missed something. But still his way of phrasing made my face burn again, my tail lashing out it’s own feelings. Naofumi also looked a bit marked with embarrassment, that smile pulling down into a distressed expression. As if that’s not what he had intended to imply in the slightest.

The moment made me forget that this newcomer was standing right here in front of us. Who coughed sharply to grab our attention, both of us snapping from whatever trance we were in to look at the man. 

“So..?”

“Just tell them to leave it to Filo, clean up whatever is left afterwards.” Naofumi let out a moderately annoyed sigh. It seemed to be wearing on him to explain away stuff about Filo once again.

“It’s actually impressive to watch her eat so much.” I said with a tone that mixed with ‘leave us alone,’ and exasperation. 

The both of us quietly suggested for him to go on.

“Um… alright, I’ll let them know.” With that the stranger turned and headed off into the fog. Leaving me and Naofumi alone once again, though now the paranoia that someone was hiding off in the fog made me unsure if I wanted to continue talking so candidly to Master Naofumi.

Maybe that’s why last night hadn’t come up yet, perhaps it wasn’t a good idea to be open about our relationship. Not because of anything as vain as jealousy or… whatever, but because that didn’t seem like us.

“So… Raphtalia.” He began but I quieted him after I stepped closer and grasped along his sleeve. His eyes looked over at me, first down at my arm, then to my face. I thought for a moment his eyes lingered but that wasn’t important.

“Would you like to have dinner on the beach tonight?” I questioned lightly, smiling towards him as it was clearly not what he was expecting. 

“Uh… I wouldn’t mind but where’s this coming from?” His face was tinged in red as I took the slightly more forward approach.

“I think… it’d give us time to talk.”

“Y-yeah, I can agree with that.” He would smile that sweet expression. Then the itchiness would return to my limbs. It was an unfamiliar feeling. “Don’t you think Filo would—”

“I think she’ll be fine.” Of all the times to bring her up. I think Naofumi kind of realized that cause he turned away shaking his head. 

“If the weather doesn’t turn then it'll be fine.” He said quickly and I knew my tail puffed up with anticipation. It had only technically been a full ten hours from my first kiss with him… and now we were going to have dinner on the beach.

“Perfect Master.” I said with a rumbling sensation of content, and a strange type of playfulness that hadn’t really manifested before.

I leaned over to peck his face with my lips, catching the edge of his jawline as he jerked slightly in surprise. We blinked at each other, and his expression which had been slipping in and out of pure bliss had decided to settle with just… quiet happiness. 

I was quite satisfied. I got him to smile like that, drawing myself away with what felt like a similar look to his own. I nodded firmly towards him getting him to lead the rest of the patrol that morning.

The both of us standing just a touch closer together than before, interchanging quiet bits of laughter as we talked softly between ourselves.

“So are you excited to have to explain Filo’s habits to a whole new set of people?” I questioned that at the very end of our patrol, finishing off in a full circle coming back to our tent. 

Naofumi chuckled werrily before reaching a hand to pull through his hair. “You know what, I don’t think I am. I think one time was enough.” I gave him a soft huff at that, my hands clasped together in front of me as I stood before him. 

The last bit of our patrol was less observational and more… talkative. This was usually the part where he would remind me of the things I had to do, being the worrywart he was. I bet he’d hand me a daily schedule sheet if it was economical, but not today…

“You can always just leave them to get used to it, or leave the explaining to me this time around.”

“I would… but you always just make it seem like she’s your daughter.”

“Well I feel like a mother more often than not so I suppose that’s only natural.”

“... is that supposed to imply you’re motherly towards more than one?” His eyes squinted down at me as I shrugged.

“How many times have I had to remind you not to get so reckless.” He scoffed at that, crossing his arms with an amused expression.

“Do you remember how many times I had to tell  _ you _ ?” 

“Nope.” His chuckle followed, it was… delicate, worth protecting. I had to protect him. I looked around us as the fog just started dissipating with the upturned breeze. “Well… we should probably get going for now.”

“Yeah…” he said that but neither of us separated. Standing there in the quiet of the street… on some foggy day, too shy to look at one another. “You have errands with the blacksmith right?” He asked, finally looking over towards me. That got me to return the favor, answering him with a nod before continuing.

“Yeah, I thought i could lend a hand and now he has me hauling stuff.” He huffed at that.

“I have some stuff to take care of around town, um…” He kicked the toe of his boot into the dusty street, glancing at his feet then back to me. “What did you feel like… for dinner?”

“Whatever you make should be delicious enough Master Naofumi!” 

“Oh… em, right…” He seemed awfully bashful over this, which was rather unusual of course. But what wouldn’t be considered unusual about this? With that we both kind of fell into silence, watching each other expectantly for a moment or two longer than intended before he spoke again. “I suppose it's time to go huh?” I blinked and looked around us, the fog falling back further and further, the sun beaming down around us.

“I suppose…” I stood twisting myself in place for a moment, a frown creasing the corners of my mouth. I didn’t really want to be away from him, and maybe that’s how he felt since we were both kind of frozen here. “... I’ll see you tonight Naofumi.” I finally broke the moment and he nodded silently.

“Yeah, see ya then Raphtalia.” Then that was that, we went our separate ways moving on to the day's tasks. Both silently hoping that the day would’ve been over already I imagine.

I honestly couldn’t accurately tell how much time had passed by the time I set the last batch of raw materials out for the local blacksmith, who had thanked me gently after offering another drink of water for all my hard work. But perhaps it was the lack of actual exhaustion which inclined me to refuse the offer. The man didn’t seem offended but he did leave me with words concerning that i get something to eat soon. 

Lunch had passed a few hours ago so that was my only basis for time at the moment, these  _ errands _ were less to do with the actual forge and more about the moving of deliveries. So sometimes throughout my busy day I'd be saddled with other people’s things that needed to be delivered. On top of hauling materials I ended up delivering parcels and letters that had arrived that day. None of it really mattered though, running all over town on the increasingly warm day was nothing compared to the fear i felt in my chest. 

_ I am going to dinner alone… with Master Naofumi. _

Every time that thought filled my head my tail would start lashing at my back and I'd feel my heart drum up a more intense beat. Not to mention the sheer terror I felt at the prospect, it was supposed to be a calm evening but how could I be calm after everything that’s happened!?

My brain kept rolling over only the worst possibilities like… what if my breath smells bad after eating, or what if i accidentally kick sand into the dinner right before we eat. But my personal favorite was the idea that suddenly a dragon would descend on the village and interrupt us. Or worse… Filo…

_ Yep, that’s the worst possible scenario. _

Exiting the blacksmith’s area I caught the last rays of sunlight beaming over the rooftops, bathing my irises in a sharpened orange glow that made me wince momentarily before adjusting. I sighed out to release the tension building in my chest as my thoughts criss-crossed and collided together. Slightly adjusting my weight at my feet to not feel that ache climbing up my legs. 

“What am I even worrying about… it's just a nice calming dinner.” I started speaking to myself as I walked down the road back towards the tent. My own calming tone doing very little, it had all been fine this morning, excitement aplenty. But as the day grew longer and longer my paranoia grew along with it. From there it was essentially downhill.

Now I was a quiet mess. Dreading the situation where a Filo-dragon hybrid arrived on the beach to eat our dinner and flew off to incinerate the village.

_ Okay… that’s a little far fetched. _

But everything else was wholly possible. Grumbling away to myself as nothing seemed to settle my overactive mind, it was reasonable that I wouldn't notice the set of eyes watching me from the left side of the road. The pavement clicking against my heel and I only became knowledgeable of another presence as a second pair of shoes trasped along after me. Usually at this time of day foot traffic was exceedingly low, especially since before all the newcomers it was all much less populated. This the new set of footsteps put my guard up, twisting around to come face to face with my friend… Keel. I must’ve been quick because in his eyes was a flash of shock, his footsteps halting short of coming alongside me. 

Then an awkward silence followed, he wasn’t expecting me to turn on him like that and I was not expecting him to be there at all. 

“Uh… Hi Keel.” I started, though I didn't understand my own hesitation. Normally i’d feel happy to see him but the memory of last night flashed in my head… when he dismissively told me not to worry about the celebration. I thought i wasn’t bothered by it but here i was... considering the memory.

“Hey… Raphtalia.” Then that familiar awkward pause followed. Keel pulled one of his hands back to grasp along his neck, his expression faced away from me as he exhaled forcefully. “Look…” He began, “I don’t trust Mr. Naofumi…” then ended. It was rather blunt and the way he conducted himself it was hard to tell his intention.

“What do you mean?” I questioned.

“He just gives me this feeling that he doesn’t-” His breath pulled in to make a dramatic pause in his speech. At that moment his eyes flashed up towards me, marked with frustration and concern. Keel cleared his throat before continuing: “I just don’t think he has… the best intentions.”

“You’re not making sense…” I muttered towards him, his ear perking up in response before he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I’m just saying that he might not be the Hero you think he is and also… to be careful.” The upturned vocal following his sentence for some reason filled me with my own frustration. 

“Tell me what you mean Keel.” I despised the feeling of being talked down to all of a sudden. I could bear it with Naofumi but hearing my friend speak to me that way made my tail puff up defensively.

“I’m just saying i don’t trust him.”

“Then what does that have to do with me?” Keel blinked as if I said something confusing. I thought it was pretty straightforward myself, perhaps not.

“I mean, don’t you get that feeling too?” That could describe about a hundred things with Naofumi, not literally but he could often exude an aura that was unpleasant. Quiet rage and even more quiet suffering didn’t mesh well for first impressions.

“No, I don't.” I replied.

“Come on Raphtalia you gotta feel it too!”

“Keel-”

“He has to have done something… I-I just can’t pretend…”

“Keel...”

“Then the way you keep fawning over him, acting like he’s some great hero-”

“He  **_is_ ** a great hero.” I spoke with a tone that dripped with anger, Keel sensed it and backed off from continuing. “If it wasn’t for Master Naofumi…” I had stepped away from him without thinking, a glare forming down my face. “You don’t get it Keel.”

“I understand humans Raphtalia, and you can sense when one isn’t good.”

“I’m saying you  **don’t understand** .” I could barely hear my voice, but it felt acidic on my tongue. “You’re wrong about him, and I would appreciate you getting to know him before trying to go around his back.” Keel looked hurt at that, I don’t think we’ve ever so strongly disagreed on something before. But it was clear to me that it didn’t go over well when I obviously wasn’t going to change my mind. 

“Raphtalia-”

“No Keel. You don’t speak to me about this anymore until you understand everything.” I turned away from him as I couldn't stand looking down at his face. “You don’t know what he’s done for me, it’s fine, but what he’s done for the world and what he’s going to continue to do. Despite what others may think of him makes him a good person, makes him a great hero.” 

“...” His silence was painful.

“He’s  _ my  _ hero if nothing else. I won’t tolerate slander even from you Keel.” I shook the anger and sadness away before breathing in a dull warm breath. “I have somewhere to be, we can talk later.”

That was that, I walked off and didn’t even look back at him as I did so. It felt mean to leave him with words like that but it was truly how I felt, so many times we went up against the odds. Naofumi and I fight rumors as well as unbeatable forces. I won’t stand for it, ever.

_ I’ll always be by his side. _

_ I swear. _

I made it to the tent without further incident, the conversation firmly behind me as I crossed over towards my cot with a new, more pressing matter to attend to. 

_ What should i wear..? _

That shouldn’t have been a hard question but as i stood there at the end of my bed, looking down at my own chest of things I found my mind going blank. Not a single idea popped into my head as I knelt down to open the container, my eyes drifting over to my stored clothing that was haphazardly tossed inside. That sight made my face twitch in displeasure, it had only been a day since Naofumi moved in and I had to hastily clean anything beforehand. Everything… and it did seem like  _ everything  _ was crumpled up into a useless little ball. That's when my eyes rolled over the sight of my one and only bathing suit… i mean we were heading to the beach so that was only reasonable right?

“Please… please don’t look terrible…”

I probably took too long with the outfit now that i was considering it, i couldn’t catalougue exactly how much time had passed but then it didn’t really matter since Naofumi appeared in the tent while i wasn’t paying attention. We had spent the whole day practically separated, but now that he was here nothing much really happened. 

“You look nice…” He had a basket with what I assumed was dinner, he complimented me on my outfit and I thanked him. Though it was hardly removed from the outfit I usually wore, less armor and just a more casual appearance, it seemed to be another cold night so I didn't want to dress too light. Naofumi set the basket on his cot and started manipulating his clothing to change, I turned away until he indicated I could look otherwise. It was all such a normal setting. 

“You look handsome.” He chose a simple woolen shirt and pants, his normal boots secured over the cuff of his legs. I complimented him and he just muttered out a small thanks that was followed by a low smile. He held the basket in his right arm, having shifted his shield to rest along his left, and then we set out for our evening together. 

All had settled down around the village as whatever hints of sunset had followed me into the tent faded away. Leaving us in that familiar torchlight, why did everything feel so fast and slow at the same time? 

As we walked along beside each other it became shockingly apparent that neither of us had an interesting day to discuss… then what could we talk about? I was certain that nothing with Keel would interest him over much, in fact the only idea I had with that was that it would just make him frustrated as much as it frustrated me. That wasn’t a mood I wanted to produce at the moment so I just stayed quiet.

“Anyone have you deliver something heavy today?” He asked politely.

“There was a load of metals I had to move… but i had help at the time.” I replied just as courteously.

That was pretty much it for our ‘on the move’ conversation, by the gods did it feel awkward. I moved closer alongside his gait but ended up invariably brushing up against his shield. He didn’t notice, I chewed on my inner lip in thought as the minutes passed on in painful silence. Not noticing the scenery change until my shoes crunched down into the soft sands of the beach. 

The smell of the ocean stronger here than anywhere uphill at the village, and as we both paused unanimously at the edge I looked back towards the town. Wondering if it was a bad idea to not have brought a torch or something like that, I figured it was because this way we could have as much privacy as possible. Then beyond that the moon usually lit the area so well at night that it was pointless as the entire beach was easily navigable.

A thought occurred to me and I glanced over at Naofumi, who at this point had been looking at me as well. I felt a cross of emotions between expected and not expected, I wanted him to look at me, but still seeing it was another thing altogether. We both looked away and cleared our throats as the crashing of the waves flowed in ahead of us.

“I di-”

“I’m sor-”

We stepped on one another's line, Naofumi had started with an explanation and I had countered with an apology. Both of us collided headlong so neither could speak. He growled lowly to himself out of frustration or embarrassment, I couldn't tell which. I felt the very same way I think, confused feelings and desires spilling over one another.

“I didn’t mean…” He started again but the words fumbled out, then he pulled his face into a pained grimace I could sympathize with. I smiled but I don’t think it cured whatever ached him or maybe I wasn't convincing enough because he continued giving that look. First to me… then the sky… then the sand at his feet.

“Why… don’t we set up first? Then we can talk.” I suggested, and he nodded along to that. Heading off to whatever desirable spot we found first but I didn't budge, leaning down to undo my boots and strip them off my feet. Sinking their bottoms into the sand as I let my bare feet touch the smoothed feeling of the beach. It was cool on this particular night, and thankfully there wasn’t a breeze to chill the air further.

I stood up to find Naofumi eying me curiously.

“Trying to get sand in your shoes?” He questioned incredulously. I only smirked up towards him as I stepped away from them and let the softness spill between my toes.

“I used to do this all the time as a child…” These memories feel like a lifetime ago... “... It feels rather nice if I’m honest.”

“Well i guess you can’t be lying… seeing as-”

“Naofumi.”

“Heh… alright, here can you hold this for me?” He said, gesturing with his basket wielding arm towards me. I nodded and went over to take it as he muttered a soft thanks. Then he bent down to copy me in removing his shoes, except he was wearing pants as opposed to my slightly longer-than usual skirt. So to prevent them from getting riddled with sand he rolled the cuffs of them up his calf. Huffing out when he was satisfied with their length before holding his arm out for the basket once more. Which i refused.

“Let me carry it the rest of the way.” Naofumi blinked, followed by a weak little frown that was tinged with subtle joy. 

“You sure… you’ve been moving heavy things all day.”

“It’s not that heavy Master.”

“Yeah… yeah.” He gave up and I noticed that he shifted his toes into the sand like me. Letting me lead the way down the beach towards the rushing waves. They were calmer than usual but still audibly moving up the shoreline. Basking the entire area in a soothing repetitive beat. 

We found a spot close enough to the water so that our setup wouldn’t be bothered but we could still enjoy whatever cool breeze as it came off the water. Naofumi produced a blanket seemingly from nowhere and before I could protest he set it over a particular comfy patch of sand. He told me that he would clean it thoroughly after tonight… I made him promise. 

Then we sat down together, Naofumi finally coercing me into giving up the basket as we did so. Setting it to the right of himself as i set my own position to his left, having to set my legs on their side. He looked at me once and patted along the top of the basket with his right hand. 

“You feel like eating yet..?” I nodded at him.

“It wouldn’t be dinner without the dinner now would it?” He chuckled and shrugged at that.

“Yeah i suppose so.” He flipped open one side of the basket, leaning over it to more correctly handle whatever lay within. He pulled back without looking to hand me a sandwich, just a plain looking sandwich, I reached up and gently took it by the corner and muttered a thanks to him to let him know i had it before he released it into my care completely. I was inspecting it to see if it had any special properties, like some status effect or maybe… i don’t know it just looked like your typical sandwich. Wrapped delicately in some waxen paper that sort of clung to the fingers every time i tried to draw them away to readjust my grip.

Soon enough Naofumi had his own sandwich in hand, looking to me expectantly.

“Well..?” He asked 

“O-oh, I was waiting for you.” I blinked at his words, feeling a tad embarrassed at my admission.

“You don’t have to worry about that, go ahead.” He spoke so kindly it was almost off putting.

“Did you do something to this sandwich?” I only teased him, but I swear I saw the red go to his ears even in the soft evening light.

“Just. Try it…”

“Okay… okay.” I was soundly defeated and brought up the sandwich to bear just as he asked. Taking a large bite from it after maneuvering the paper to safely eat, it was… good, and as I sat there chewing along I saw Naofumi kind of eying me further. I assume he was waiting for my review. I swallowed down what I had and his expression turned closer to an eager child. “It's really good!” I couldn’t disappoint that expression, but he didn’t seem satisfied with that. He had this low melancholic expression and huffed out.

“I’m glad to hear Raphtalia.” He took a somewhat smaller bite from his own and just kind of shook his head after. I rolled more of the paper down before taking another bite from the meal, making sure this one was more delicate before I spoke again. Covering my mouth to not be rude.

“Was i supposed to say something else?”

“No! I just… i don’t know what i was expecting honestly.” He chuckled towards his food as he spoke. Glancing over at me as I finished chewing, he leaned in towards me, inspecting my face assuredly since he said; “You have a smudge…” I felt warm as I thanked him and reached up to wipe away whatever it was with my thumb. I think it was from whatever the sandwich had within but it could’ve also been something from the workshop.

“Did i get it?” I asked, exposing my face to him. Seeing his nod that followed eased my embarrassment but not by much. Now to move along, “What were you expecting then?” I asked, taking another bite as he took one of his own. Leaving us both muted momentarily since we were both eating, but it didn’t last that long.

“Nothing seriously, I think I kind of messed them up anyway…” 

“How is that possible, the things you make always taste delicious.” I said it, trying to encourage him, but he just sadly shrugged down at the now half eaten sandwich in his hands. 

“Sure but…” His lipped twinged momentarily and that sparked a concern in my heart, inching just a bit closer towards him.

“But what..?”

“Do you remember that time after the duel.. With Motoyasu?” I recalled immediately.

“Yes.”

“Well… you made us lunch, I remember it, vividly…”

“I remember making you promise that we’d eat lots of good food from then on.”

“I just remember the sandwich…” He spoke, and the low tone of the evening seemed to sparkle in his eyes. “... Probably the best thing I'd ever eaten I think.” 

“I can see that.” I said it so plainly that he looked over at me with a hopeful expression. “I do make some excellent sandwiches.” He paused, unable to react for a moment as my joke hit him like a brick… then he let a small chuckle escape him. Taking another bite of his sandwich so I followed and took a bite of mine.

“I think my ingredients are a little off to be honest.”

“It's not that Naofumi…” I said it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I think it’s because… it was really important to you.” My heart had begun fluttering, I don't remember when but it was hurting my chest and making my lungs seize up. 

“You’re probably right…” He muttered softly, neither of us were watching the other at this time. Biting away at our sandwiches between words and letting the pauses act like a mini buffer between embarrassing feelings. I took one of those pauses to scoot just a bit closer than before, leaning over to rest my head on his shoulder without warning. He didn’t do anything more than just simply rest his head along the top of mine and we stayed there eating our sandwiches. 

Content to just be there together.


	6. A Good Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Having a good date.

_ Well… now what. _

  


That was my thought as I finished off my sandwich, having bitten down to the corner until I could just  plop the  remainder into my mouth. Crumpling the wax paper a few bites ago leaving me nothing more than the trash after finishing. Naofumi was still eating but noticed my current state, holding out his left hand for the trash which I readily obliged him. Watching his  appendage carry it over to the basket to discard it within.

  


The basket itself  wasn’t anything special but seemed  really spacious at first glance, I couldn't believe two sandwiches were all that he brought. Swallowing down my dinner before sitting myself up from his shoulder I leaned a bit over his lap, trying to  look into the container but the way it was set only let me see a little bit over the lip of the lid.

  


“Wondering what else I brought?” He questioned me as I so casually invaded his space, he held this look of shock mixed with a certain calmness. Emotions and expressions were always so complicated and it was hard to discern one thing from another. I  didn’t know if this was too forward, hanging over his lap and all that so I pulled myself back to my  previous spot at his side. Only this time I leaned more forward towards the sea, bringing my knees up to wrap my arms delicately over myself. Peering back at Naofumi as he  still remained lax beside me.

  


“The sandwiches were excellent, but I am feeling a bit thirsty…” That was a half lie,  seeing as I  really just wanted to know exactly what he had brought  seeing as he was intending this basket to be a surprise assortment. Naofumi finished his sandwich with  what seemed to be a rather large bite, chewing firmly before leaning over the container.

  


“Well I brought a variety…” He was still chewing so his words were  muffled behind a wall of food.

  


“Master Naofumi… It's rude to speak with your mouth full.” It had to be intentional if the look in his eyes were evidence as he gave my words a  sidelong glance. I shook my head in  feigned disappointment as he gulped down. Rolling his eyes at me before leading his gaze back over to the mystery goods.

  


“Well first things first I seem to have…” He let the suspense hang as he reached in and drew out two  very familiar canteens, “water!” They looked a little too familiar. 

  


_ Did… did he just grab them from our travel gear!?  _

  


I think he noticed my  furrowed gaze; I  wasn't mad… since it was just like Naofumi to be  frugal but come on, he couldn’t have used two  _ other _ canteens? He just  continued on diving into the contents of the basket, then he paused. It was only a moment but it was brief enough to catch him looking at something hidden inside. 

The pause ended with him shifting something out of the way and taking something else into his hands before  coming up with a  somewhat sizable package. It was covered in that sandwich paper from before but the item itself was larger.  It's kind of slumped as he held it with one hand before simultaneously shutting the lid with his free hand while drawing it away. I still  couldn’t make out exactly what was in the basket still. I  don’t know why I was so  fixated on that when I  could've just been enjoying my evening but here, we were.

  


“And what’s that?” I questioned softly, bringing my attention directly to the item before he turned to me and replied.

  


“ Well... not a drink if that’s what you’re wondering.” 

  


“I assumed as much, seeing as it’s a bit more solid.” He chuckled gently at that and brought the collected item to his lap, nestling it over the small of his thighs before delicately undoing the paper. A subtle tear was all that it took to reveal the contents within, a soft breaded item that seemed to be falling apart with large delicate cracks forming disastrously along the top. It looked fresh but any smell that I could discern was lost to the saltiness in the air.

  


I almost  couldn’t believe what I was  seeing.

  


“I had some spare time today so… I tried my hand at baking.” 

  


_ Naofumi… baking? _

  


Why was that idea so novel to me, my only impression of bakers were soft  jovial men and women wrapped up in their aprons soaked to the floor in  flour. But taking in his contrast to that idea was very amusing, I let out a laugh that came out more as a  snort , grabbing Naofumi’s attention to look towards me. That soft moonlight started once again so I was just able to make out the hints of rising color on his face. 

  


“W-What is it?” His vocals strained subtly towards me as I slowly devolved  more and more into laughter. It  wasn’t hard, just a soft giggle that followed draws of breath. “You’re laughing at  me, aren’t you?” His voice became that same old dry once again.

  


“Oh.  hehe … Naofumi, not  _ at _ you…” My voice came out in between fits of giggling, always looked down upon with that colder gaze. “Just… the idea,  hehe , of you in an  _ apron _ …” 

  


“I  _ had _ to wear one-” I gave a huge  snort at that, and Naofumi suddenly smiled. I barely saw it because of my fit. “That funny huh? Imagining me in an apron?” I nodded as I drew my hand up to stifle my continued laugh, making it choke in my throat with only a clearing cough to follow. Looking over at him beside me with a soft tingling in my face and the  wateriness taking over my eyes. 

  


“Oh my gosh… I'm sorry.” I cleared my throat again as the imagery kept trying its best to make me break. His face was a mix between being embarrassed and amusement, a remarkable smile flowing over his whole expression. 

  


It  _ hit  _ me just then, all of it at once, the feeling that this  wasn’t the Naofumi I really had known. He was… normal, smiling and watching me laugh at him and he was happy it seemed. The uneasiness was off and away from this moment and it was so refreshing, that only brought me along to realize that even I was acting differently. Laughing at the absurd notion that this man who had bought me as his slave was draping himself in an apron to bake me something for our first date.  I think these thoughts caused me to frown cause his expression shifted ever so slightly. 

  


“Is this  us...? ” I  don’t know why I said it but there it was, cutting out all the joy and replacing it with another sensation altogether. It was just repeating in my head from last night and decided to slip out. No will to it, no intention, just a question to the person resting next to me who had that very same sentiment to express. Naofumi blinked in my direction, surprised by my words. It was overcoming his features as that phrase from the other night came back, now echoed. Why was I suddenly doubting? It felt so awful to bring it up but it just slipped out, and with all these thoughts how could it not?!

  


I was panicking now as he leaned back to gaze up towards the sky, fear drawing up my throat as the idea that I had ruined the night drowned whatever rationale I could  possibly have . The pastry was still resting in his lap as he drew his hands back to rest along the top of the blanket.

  


“That… is a tough question…” Naofumi sucked in a breath that whistled in between a small parting of his lips, his eyes still, staring up at the sky as I watched him for his answer. “Is this who we are?” He  wasn’t really talking to me, it was clear, but that  didn’t make me hesitate in retorting.

  


“I mean… that’s not exactly what we were asking right?” Because he had said the same thing the night before, ‘Is this us?’ 

  


I thought I grasped what his intention was  at the moment but now that I had repeated his question back to him without thinking, I was feeling immensely unsure about the circumstance. I  wasn’t feeling like myself, and I could  extrapolate beyond that that  maybe Naofumi wasn’t feeling like himself either. Was  all of this a mistake? The worries just kept pouring out and filling whatever space they could in my head.

  


“I mean… sure, but the same idea applies I think.”

  


“Yes.” I said  rather blankly , I  didn't really know what to say and with the turmoil in my head and the knot forming inside of me. Anything more profound was choked in my throat.

  


“Is it okay to say I don’t know?” His gaze found me then, and he leaned forward and out of his  laid-back positioning to cradle the pastry in his hands once more. His head turned towards me but his eyes  didn’t follow along, they were instead  observing the item in his lap.

  


“I mean… yes… it's not like I’m in a better position than you.” 

  


“Then… neither of us could say definitively what that means.” His tone shifted into a  colder calculating one. Like he was trying to piece together a strategy or something. “Is this us? I don’t know, you live one way and then suddenly life has  very different ideas.”

  


“What do you mean?”

  


“I mean… last night I couldn’t imagine what being together with you would’ve meant. I was so sure our relationship was one way…”

  


“I can understand that.” I replied, because it was true, last night I  could've never thought that I would have ended up here with Naofumi. In  fact, I had the worst in mind at the time, there was always hope… but what I really wanted was to clear the air between us, so-to-speak.

  


“Now this.” His face turned down towards the bread and my eyes followed along, gazing at the cracks in the surface.

  


“The bread?”

  


“No… the effort? I think…” 

  


“Like… the date?”

  


“No, I mean I made this for us, for a date.”

  


“ Right...? ” I  wasn’t following, which I think Naofumi understood because he moved to clear his thoughts up.

  


“What I'm saying is, yesterday's cooking was mostly about just staying alive, I like it sure enough but I never made us something to impress someone.” I blinked as understanding was coming over me. “But today… when you left me to think about dinner, I  _ wanted _ to make something special.”

  


“When just the other night you would not have?”

  


“I’m not saying I never made something to be good intentionally… just that I never…” He sucked in a sharp breath once again as if the words themselves were suffocating to say. “I think this is us, deep down.” the air became somber as he continued. “I don’t know though.”

  


“How do you mean?” Without really thinking about it I let myself come back to even out our  spacing , bringing a hand up to gently caress his back. He almost flinched but found himself pushing gently into my touch.

  


“I mean, I don’t know what I mean.” He had this twisted look, like he was desperately trying to piece the thoughts but just  couldn’t string them together. The subtle tensing of his fingers around the edges of the bread made it  evident he found the current setting frustrating. “I just don’t feel  _ wrong _ I guess.”

  


I blinked at that, was there a version of this where it was off, I may be questioning our identity but I  couldn't say I  didn’t enjoy every second of this new stage in our relationship. “I think I understand what you mean…”

  


“I guess that only brings us back into asking why we have that question in our heads then.”

  


“Right… a full circle…” We both chuckled weakly at that realization. This  wasn’t getting us anywhere… and the longer it went on the more it  seemed to be pointless.

  


“Do you think…” He started, which got me to look up from the pastry to his face. He  hadn’t faced me just yet so his angle was heading towards his lap, then in a small moment of pause he returned my look. My hand ceased against his back and slumped down to the blanket unceremoniously. “Um… do you think this will taste good?” His voice was slightly off, it reminded me of myself when I was scared. The subtlety of vocal trembling barely  evident but it was there.

  


I  didn’t answer him, just holding his eyes for a moment or two longer before leaning over casually to tear a piece from the edge of the bread. It was incredibly soft, like what you would think a cloud would feel like to lay on. I brought it over to my mouth and took a bite from the soft  innards without a single bout of hesitation, technically taking a dive before Naofumi could form a protest. 

  


The texture  wasn’t too  dissimilar to the feel it gave, what was remarkable however is that it held the same delicate  flavoring akin to  a piece of cake . Sweet and casual on the palette as I chewed down the piece, it was only the inner softness that I tried so I moved in to eat up the stretch of crust I had taken with me. Finding it slightly tougher than the cloud like interior, receiving a more chewable item. What could I be expecting beyond perfection from Naofumi’s boosted ability, but his face still told me he was worried about the  quality.

  


It felt silly to be worried about something that he has proven  time and time again that he could do perfection with his eyes closed… but it was clear that this was different. He was trying for this to be  a good selection of food, he wanted me to feel something… something like that time when he could taste again. He was packing these things with emotions and trying to convey himself through his food.

  


I  don’t know how I got all that from the sweet bread that I ate… but as I swallowed down with him still watching  me, I suddenly felt…

  


“What do you think?” He asked, following it by breathing in harshly as if he was holding it for the better half of me indulging myself. I  didn’t reply, instead I reached in to take another piece of bread from the edge I had already decimated. He was watching my movements with a degree of scrutiny that no one could expect in a moment that seemed so mundane. But it was otherwise the most important feeling at the same time, you just  can’t explain what it feels like.

  


I guided myself up to hold this piece up to him, offering the fluffy cake-like item. His eyes flashed down to the piece and then to me with a cocked eyebrow. Confused in the moment as the wordless exchange had begun. 

  


He leaned in and took a bite, his gaze looked to his lap as he slowly chewed. The emotion in his expression was a dull bland one that seemed to dim further by the second. It was undoubtedly  good food , so maybe it  wasn’t to some set standard for himself, an obnoxious feeling that it just  wasn’t good enough for what he was trying to do. 

  


I knew that type of feeling all too well.

  


He sighed out softly, his gaze  downtrodden as I expected he was feeling disappointed. Then I leaned over and gave his cheek a soft kiss, it  wasn’t expected so he jerked slightly from the feeling before realization caught him. Returning to allow me one more gentle peck, I pulled myself into a more comfortable position before returning the  emaciated piece back to the slightly unwrapped item. Using my newly free hand to come over to hold itself against his stomach, intending a soothing press on the outside of his shirt. At the same  time, I drew myself to lounge in the space of his neck, half hugging him as we sat there before gently speaking next to his ear.

  


“It’s wonderful.”  That’s all I needed to say, or wanted to at least.  All of these emotions are so frustrating, the worry and fear, but then there was this. This form of happiness and relaxation, it felt strange because I  couldn’t recall when I experienced it before with such intensity.

  


It was us, being normal, away from the worries of the world and just being with each other. 

  


It is a beautiful feeling. 

  


I separated myself from him and returned to a suitable spot, flashing him a smile as his eyes followed along after me. He stayed still with this  somewhat baffled expression, like he  wasn’t sure exactly how to continue this evening, while he remained that way. I took up a canteen and opened the top to take a drink. Watching his  dumbfounded face for a moment or two as the nice cool freshwater cleansed my palette, returning my canteen to the blanket. “You know… It’s not often I get to see you so stumped for conversation.”

  


Naofumi shook his expression away and looked ahead at the waves and their rhythmic calm. “It’s not so often you don’t act all serious.” We  didn’t bother exchanging looks as our dialogue continued, though at that remark I felt a certain tightness in my chest. 

  


“I don’t act \- “

  


“ Oh, you most certainly do.” He said with a chuckle. “Always marching around all business.”

  


“I don’t  _ march _ .” I growled playfully over at  him; my eyes flicked over to him to see a tiny smile drawing up the corner of his mouth. “Besides… it’s better than intimidating everyone with your little  scowl .” 

  


He paused momentarily to take up his canteen to drink, his eyes wandering over to me in return.  It’s like he could sense when I was watching him, I let myself look ahead. “Everyone huh?”

  


“Well, spend enough time with the Shield Hero and you get used to it.” My knees were still sitting up on the blanket, pulled towards my chest so I was letting my hands rest over top of the bare knees. Gently applying pressure into the sides for a moment or two before continuing. “Then you realize Mr. Naofumi is a  mushy pushover.” He had been taking another drink when he began choking from my declaration.

  


“H… Hardly, I work you all to the bone, even Filo!” Okay,  maybe it was a little much to say that he was a pushover. But he got  awfully cute when he reacted like that, sighing delicately I just continued staring at the calm horizon ahead. A deep darkened cloud line framing the reflective glass surface of the ocean. I sensed his movements lead the canteen back to the blanket, and furthermore the crinkling of wax paper as he wrapped up the dessert. The  creak of the basket as he returned it back into the container and the unceremonious ‘shick’ of the cover returning to form.

  


The movements in the corner of my eye  indicated he swept his pants of any  possible crumbs before crossing his legs together. Much like a  meditative pose but he was leaned forward out towards the sea much like myself. A soft breeze cut in and brought my attention back towards the scenery.

  


The darkness of the sea was something to behold, at least far off where the clouds were hanging over. The lack of illumination made any filtering light from the sky appear as if swirling forms were hiding in the water. Flowing in and out like swirling eels of darkness. Closer to the shore became much  brighter with the lack of suffocating cloud cover.

  


“We’re in for a storm again.” Last night was only a gentle rain and foggy morning. Staring at this sight filled me with a familiar anxiety.

  


“You can tell?” He asked gently.

  


“It’s the clouds, and the ocean… it’s really  calm .” I heard a soft ‘hm’ off to my right. “And the air, it’s always slightly warmer than usual.” It was just a lot of familiar feelings when I was here. Tinged with a  melancholic haze with every forthcoming memory. 

  


“That’s interesting…  I guess I never really thought about it back home.” I relaxed my legs down, flattening out the top of my skirt as my heels set out into the sand. I rolled my right foot over to gently press over the top of my left. It felt awkward to exist without something exerting some sort of force. I  couldn’t say why.

  


“ So, they would sneak up on you?” I joked, looking over towards him. He was still staring at the ocean but his eyes fluttered and he brought his expression over to me.

  


“Maybe when I was younger, I remember times when these big rain storms seemed to appear. They’d start out as little  droplets but they’d turn into torrential downpour.”

  


“Oh… how many times did you get soaked through?” Imagining a younger Naofumi drenched and grumpy made a small smile form on me.

  


“Only one time, I was sure to keep an umbrella on me afterwards…” his face pulled more into amusement as his thoughts continued. “My mom was so angry… she had just bought me a new shirt and when I came  inside, I was drenched.” His look wavered just a tiny bit.

  


“You haven’t really spoken about your parents much.” 

  


“Yeah, well I guess there’s not much to say.” The way his tone and eyes flicked towards my cheek told me that it might not be a subject to press. I moved from watching him as well, finding an interesting star above us both.

  


“My father loved to tell stories,” I paused, reminiscing over the memories for just a moment. Ruminating on the subject above me. “He once told me that the Moon was jealous of the Sun, that she was trying her best to outshine the stars.” I looked down at myself, slightly chewing on the lining of my cheek. “Sometimes there were stories about heroes… sometimes about the forest. But looking back they all kind of seem similar.” I glanced at the space between us, letting my hand lazily plant itself in the blanket. Smoothing out the fabric and pressurizing the  droplet sand beneath.

  


“How do you mean?” He asked.

  


“Well…  I think he was trying to get me to realize… that even the most mundane thing can be  amazing in its own right .” I  couldn’t know, they could be just dumb stories. A familiar tightness wrung itself over my heart, crushing and choking. “I don’t know though.” 

  


“He sounds like a good man.” 

  


“Yeah.” I looked over at him, a weak smile on my face. Who knew the grief could still feel so fresh. I moved over to him so suddenly he  didn’t have time to react before I leaned in and hugged myself to his torso. Only a moment passing before his left arm came around my side and rested gently on my hip. His chest without the  breastplate was much more welcoming, no harsh cold metal to separate the feeling of rising breaths and thumping beats of his heart. It seemed a little faster in observation as I listened to the solid noise. My tail started waving in response to his relaxing tone thumping beneath my ear.

  


“Raphtalia..?” He said, his posture adjusting in a way that we were both leaned a little more back.

  


“Yes?” 

  


“How… hm… how do you think this is going?” The nervous tone in his voice was  evident , it was cute but I honestly wanted him to stop worrying. 

  


“Don’t you think you should be enjoying yourself for once?” 

  


“Uh… probably.” 

  


“Definitely.” I pulled myself up just a bit to gaze at his face, which was turned into this bashful…  adorable expression. “There’s nothing to worry about here.” My paranoia  couldn’t interrupt the present enjoyment of his company. Or I  wouldn’t let it rather. His eyes rolled to one side before finding my own once again. 

  


“Okay…”

  


“Promise me…”

  


“What?”

  


“Promise me you’ll stop worrying so much.”

  


“Well \- “ as his objection came  up, I firmly poked his side. “Hey! Okay… okay I’ll stop worrying.”

  


“Good!” I declared.

  


“You didn’t have to threaten me with violence…”

  


“Hardly… a bit over dramatic, even for you Naofumi.” He audibly balked over me but his arms came up to hold me so I knew it was all just a show. 

  


“Do you think your parents would’ve liked me?”

  


“Oo definitely…”

  


“...really?” I nodded before continuing.

  


“They would’ve been able to tell you’re a big  mushy hero.”

  


“You better not be spreading that around,  going to ruin all my  hard-earned valiant hero status.”

  


“ Oh, we can’t have that.” I say chuckling against him.

  


“ Mm. ” With that dull noise he let his left hand sneak up my shoulder, lightly smoothing over the edge of my shirt before allowing his hand to draw up to the top of my scalp. Caressing the side of my head for the briefest of seconds before his thumb came over to smooth over the back of my ear. They flicked in reaction to being thumbed over and he would readily move the palm of his head to the center between them both. Gently rubbing my head.

  


“What do you think your parents will think of me?” I asked him, feeling his palm unnaturally stiffen before he moved to reply.

  


“I honestly have no idea…” He mumbled out his answer, the hand returning to its soft pace over the center of my scalp. He  didn’t seem to want to continue this line of conversation, I could sense the  untimely pause in his speech. Like the reconsideration of the words resting along the top of his tongue. “... I think they wouldn’t know what to do.” His hand stopped once  again; this inconsistency was starting to bother me. “I never brought a girl home before.” At that I heard the hushed growl flow after, and his right arm raised up alongside the both of us. His left hand  smoothed over the back of my head, freeing me to sit up to gaze over at him. His face was  contorted into a  pained expression, his lips parted exposing a gritted jawline, eyes closed tightly.

  


He  must’ve been horribly embarrassed or something of that nature. “Something bothering you Naofumi?” I spoke lightly, trying to  maintain the easy tone of the whole conversation as that wincing face turned slightly more towards bland discomfort. 

  


“Just… that’s horribly stupid to admit.” His hand moved from his face and his eyes opened. 

  


“Huh, I guess so.” My vocals petered out as I so desperately tried to think of something to say. But almost nothing came to mind, it was so frustrating, I glanced back towards the ocean and once more back to Naofumi. His eyes on the view ahead with an expressionless mask returning to form. We kept swapping every other moment with awful awkwardness, flowing in and out of lulls of conversation with a repetition that slowly started to irk me there beside him. “You can tell me about them if you’d like.” I sounded out  unconsciously, because he really  hadn’t and the realization just  kind of slipped out. A dry chuckle escaped him and I gave him a  quizzical expression as his eyes flashed over to me once before he let them shut. Looking down at his chest for a moment before his head tilted back towards me, opening his eyes to reveal them looking away from my face. 

  


As if he was ashamed.

  


“I suppose I haven’t, well there really isn’t much to say I guess.” His hand moved up to idly rub the back of his head. “They were both strict and that’s about it.” 

  


“Well that can’t really be it.” I say, and the way his gaze flicks up to me tells me that it is true. He was hesitant, but he  didn’t rebuff my inquiry so quickly like he would have any day before now. 

  


“No… but it’s not too terribly interesting, they had their expectations for me and I didn’t fit them. I  don’t know why but  that’s just the way it is, they had a second child and instead focused on him. Left me to my own devices.” He shut his eyes again, the corner of his mouth pulling unnaturally. It seemed this was still a raw issue, or unresolved, something like that. But he  didn’t seem to stop talking so I just let him continue. “I helped my brother when he was really struggling and since I stopped their star child from screwing  up, they let me just live around.” His fist clenched, but his expression softened in strange contrast. “My family isn’t too interesting.” He repeated, the clenched hand unfurled to come up the front of his right knee, pushing up the fabric of his pants as the fingers seized around the leg. 

  


“That’s okay.” I said.

  


“Right…” His syllables were sharp, unintentionally I think, there were a lot of feelings there. Some  seemed to be frustration, some were anger, there was indifference. But as I sat there staring longingly towards his face, there  really only seemed to be one primary feeling of note.

  


“We can talk about it another time.” I rose to my feet at that, rocking on the balls of my feet before turning on my heel towards him. He faced me as I stepped closer and offered my hand to him. Which he accepted without hesitation, bringing him up to stand.

  


“Want to start heading back?” He questioned, looking down at me with those eyes that seemed so lost. My heart fluttered up in my chest as I shook my head wordlessly, getting my hair to swish around the edges of my vision before turning out and away from the shore. A small breeze tickled on the inside of my ear and it twitched delicately in response. I reached out without looking to slip my palm into his. I feel like I knew instantly where to reach to grasp onto him, so instinctual, so simple. I squeezed his hand and he returned the firm grip. Then I stepped out towards the water and suddenly the hand that was holding mine seized up and cut off my  gait . “Uh, what are you doing?” I twisted around to face him, still holding his immovable hand.

  


“Just trust me.” 

  


“I trust you plenty-”

  


“Then trust me a little more.” I say exasperatedly, tugging him along again which he slowly started to give into. Pouting like a kid all the while, but he did give in to my demands. Letting me lead him down the beach to the edge of the water as it lapped up the sand, darkening the floor in moisture before receding with whitening foam left in its wake. I released his hand as we got close, stepping quickly into the cold ocean water.  I felt my entire body start to goosebump as the chill hit my feet and quickly swelled up to my calves as I moved further in. I was extremely careful not to let my tail rest in the cold and let it instead flex around my waist. I turned back to see Naofumi just getting the water to his ankles, his eyes following the ripples I left that were getting lost in the momentum of the water before his eyes drew up to me. I swayed just a bit as he watched me for a moment.

  


“It’s cold.” He said, simply.

  


“Is it too much for you?” I spoke with just a hint of sarcasm lining my words. That  scowl followed as he leaned down to roll his pants just once more so they were above his knee. Then he moved on until he was just in front of me. The water licking up his calves much like my own but less so,  seeing as he was taller than me. “I’ll take that as a no.” I say, tilting my head to the side as I looked up towards him.

  


“Uh huh, so… I didn’t bring anything to swim in.” He moved his arms so his hands came up to sit on his hips. 

  


“I know, it just feels nice.” I stepped my feet in the water to make my point, wiggling my toes into the soaked sand beneath us both. The water around here was usually so clear, but tonight it seemed murky. “Kind of like the hot springs just without the heat.” My hands came up to meet each other, interlocking my fingers before bringing that  congealed mass to my stomach.

  


“Sometimes the cold can be just as relaxing.” He concluded which I nodded in agreement. I adjusted my grip over my stomach, pushing on the fabric of my shirt. Then just as quickly as I did so I released my hands, letting them hang uselessly at my sides without much idea on what I could do.

  


_ I brought us out into the water and I  _ _ can’t _ _ even do anything more than stand here. _

_ I wonder what Naofumi is thinking- _

  


Slicing into my train of thought was the cold spray of water as it whipped up my outfit. 

  


“AH!” I let out sharply as a stifled chuckle sounded out ahead of me, blinking as the cold shock wore away. I stared ahead at the perpetrator, one Naofumi Iwatani, as I reached up with my right hand to wipe away the water that was splashed up to my face. “Did you seriously just splash me?” He saw through whatever angry facade I was putting up and let his  left-hand dip back into the dark with a smile  peeking through under his eyes. 

  


“Maybe… isn’t it supposed to be relaxing?” My eyes were drawn to his prepared hand.

  


_ So, _ __ _ it’s _ _ war! _

  


I declared internally as I swiftly dipped my own left hand into the water and sent a handful up towards his features. He predicted this inevitably and moved to my left to dodge the sword of water headed towards him. Sending another stream with his right hand instead but this was merely a reaction, and only went wide off towards the beach. 

  


Moving in the water  felt like moving through a thin type of sludge, they  dulled my limbs that were usually so fleet footed on the ground. We circled around each other, our legs sending vicious ripples towards one another even in the continued movement of the sea. 

  


“Was this your plan the whole time, Naofumi?” I accused  him; eyes focused down on the man before me as he returned my look with the same intensity. 

  


“Hardly, I just took the opportunity when I saw it, Raphtalia.” My whole stance was lowered towards the surface of the water, prepared to launch an assault from wherever. That was not my plan though, to only splash him with a bit of water.

  


_ I’m _ _ going to win.  _

  


I stepped forward once and Naofumi changed his stance into something more defensive. The Shield was positioned under his left arm, acting as a  sort of ultimate scoop attack. He could win this in one decisive blow if I let down my guard. Swiftly launching a  right-handed attack, curling my palm into the water to send forth a large semicircle stream at his head, he dodged without thinking as it cut over him. He turned his gaze over at my wide attack as it passed him.

  


“Been taking lessons from Melt-” He  didn’t have the time to finish his  quip . Having distracted him with that  pitiful swipe I claimed the space between us both with slightly delayed speed, bracing my hands forward to collide with his core as his attention was elsewhere. It was just enough to shove Naofumi back into the water with a spectacular splash. He  didn’t submerge completely, but he was  definitely soaked , the man landed on his  backside with a look of complete shock etched on his face. 

  


“How’s that for lessons Naofumi?” I joked, having completely decimated him in our war. The shock faded and was replaced with a wide grin, though no words were spoken for a moment before we started laughing. Feeling a whole fit coming on as he rose from the water dripping, imagining that this was what a younger Naofumi went through all those years ago. 

  


“Laugh it up Raph.” He said dangerously, in my state I  didn't notice him get closer as well, chuckling all the while. Until the sudden feeling of his arms hoisting me up.

  


“Naofumi!” I yelled out as I was hauled up over his shoulder, wiggling in his sudden claim, his left arm secured over my legs. Balancing me easily. “Naofumi!” I cried again and this time the man stopped, turning himself out towards the sea. “Don’t you dare.” I hissed down his back, my hands having to brace along his drenched shirt in preparation.

  


“Oh  Raphtalia … It’s only fair.” The tone was filled with venom, as he took one big step out into the  water, I began writhing in his hold again. 

  


“When did you become such a proponent of fairness!?” I cried out as we made it to knee high water, twisting myself up to look around at his head as he hefted me around. Only the warm vibrations of his laughter were received in response, then he crouched down and  proceeded to launch me back into the air. Letting a sharp scream out as my entirety was absorbed down into the ocean. 

  


Shocking cold enveloped me as I quickly stood up, completely drenched much like Naofumi who was standing just ahead of me looking quite pleased with himself. I imagine… because my long hair had collapsed around the front of my face, I reached up and pulled the  long, once fluffy strands of hair and rolled them back along my head. Rubbing the saltwater from my eyes and lips, flicking the residual  droplets from my hands off at Naofumi. 

  


He was still laughing before I could open my eyes, I think I  must’ve looked like a wet dog. Which  wasn’t far off, with my tail  drooping down with the weight of the water. When I was finally able to look at him properly. His longer hair was  matted down along his skull in draping forms, the ends of it all dripping with seawater much like my own. He reached a hand up to push his hair back along his head while the rest of his body trembled with amusement. The water was indeed cold; If the stinging feeling along my body  wasn’t evidence enough. Then exposure to the open evening air was just the topping on this situation.

  


Naofumi returned his hands to his hips, letting a sharp burst of air out of his nose as he looked upon me with a high opinion of himself. 

  


“I got you good.” He chuckled out, feeling my  scowl forming and I quickly replied.

  


“You lost first anyway!” I crossed my arms over myself as a subtle shiver made its way up my back. I sauntered over towards him, coming around so any  possible breeze could hit him instead of me, I looked up at him with what I imagined was a pouting expression.

  


“Yeah … suppose I did.” 

  


“You admit defeat then!” I say,  probably a little too  excitedly . Stepping forward towards him with a grin rather than pouting frustration. He cocked his eyebrow down at me and that got me to tone down my eagerness just a bit.

  


“Yes… I admit defeat, even though I still got my revenge.” At  that a  firmer breeze kicked up, stronger than any in the whole evening. Ripping around the edge of Naofumi’s form it sliced down onto me, setting a sharp cold straight through my clothing and into my bones. My hands came up and around my midsection as I started trembling with the sudden drain of body temperature.

  


“G-good!” I chattered out between my suddenly uneasy jawline, turning back towards the shore I decided it was  probably best to head back and get dried off. “We should head back, unless we want a cold!” I started my walk back up towards the beach, flanked behind by Naofumi sloshing along. Even holding  myself  wasn’t enough to remove the cold setting in with the  upturned breeze. Compounded by  sopping wet clothes it was starting to get  really uncomfortable , the skirt was sticking along the sides of my legs and my shirt was not faring much better. As we stepped out of the water, I stopped to pull my tail in front of myself, having waited so I could properly start to wring the moisture out. 

  


Naofumi stepped around me and advanced towards the picnic ahead of us, my eyes trailed along for just a moment out of curiosity but refocused instead on my tail. Twisting my body in such a way that it was easier to hold out away from myself, letting the water  seep down onto the sand.

  


_ Why was I born with such absorbent fur?! _

_ And the hair… It  _ _ has to _ _ be some sort of curse. _

  


“ Mm. Raphtalia ?” He spoke just ahead of me, turning my head up to see him holding another blanket in his hands, he  wasn’t looking directly at me. His eyes were turned away and down at the sand next to my feet, it was  pretty obvious he was trying to get me to warm up.

  


“What about you?” I asked as I let my freshly squeezed tail swing back behind me, leaning forward and tilting my head to the side to do the same to my hair. Letting it hang off to the right as my hands came up to begin the process.

  


“I’ll be fine.” He  stated , unfurling the large  woolen item in front of him like a curtain. Pulling his head back to inspect the fabric like he was making sure it was of  good quality , which he  probably had done earlier when he packed it.

  


“You always bring two blankets to a picnic?” I was almost done with my hair, being that there was so much of it I had to really work for the inner parts, it was easier just to let it dry on its own rather than working away at it.

  


“It pays to be prepared…” He mumbled as he finished his inspection before looking ahead at me. I stood up and  continued on , letting my wrung hair rest along my front before I reached down to grasp the edge of my shirt. I  wasn’t even considering Naofumi as I drew my clothing up just above my stomach before his voice cut in. “Raphtalia!?” I blinked in surprise, looking at him feeling very confused.

  


“Naofumi?!” I said, mimicking his strange tone.

  


“Don’t you think you should warn me?” The man raised the blanket up to obstruct his face, realization hitting me that he was embarrassed. Seeing me remove my clothes…

  


“You’ve seen me change before Master…  _ how _ is this any different?” 

“What do you  mean ‘ how is this different,’ of course it’s different.” I felt my eyes rolling as I continued, stripping off my soaked shirt first. 

  


“Naofumi, you’re acting strange.” I draped the shirt over my arm before adjusting my swimsuit top, I only wore the basic pieces in case it came up. It pays to be prepared for every scenario. The skirt was a simpler affair, only really having to loosen it from my waist and step out of it. Setting it over the shirt as I approached the privacy barrier created by the blanket that Naofumi was still hiding behind. “But I guess I can understand how it might be weird for you. Thinking strange thoughts and all that.” He caught on that I was closer now from the sound of my voice, at least I assumed.

  


“Are you done?” He asked, as I reached up to pull the blanket down so he could  actually see me.

  


“ Yes, I'm done Master Naofumi.” He was trying to not look, but he caught sight of my suit before turning a pleasant shade of red as he registered his folly. “You’re not the only one who prepares.” I say shaking my head, turning away from  him and glancing back towards the blanket then to his face. He understood instinctively, moving forward so he could delicately wrap me in the blanket, pulling his arms around my front as it sat down on my shoulders. Covering me in a gentle warmth, he pulled away and coughed awkwardly out to the air beside us as I turned my body to face him. Feeling a wide grin pulling on my features as I watched him, his eyes flicking up at me before they widened, knowing I was going to bring it up. “You were nervous to see me naked, again weren’t you?”

  


“Stop talking.” He  seemed to go rigid, lips formed into a tight expression.

  


“Just admit it Naofumi.” He took a big step towards me and took the blanket in his hands before bringing it up to my mouth.

  


“Stop. Talking.” Covering my mouth  didn’t really do much as his eyes became intense, boring down into my own  in an attempt to dissuade me from bringing up his embarrassment. I giggled beneath his hand and blanket, totally assured that I was indeed correct.

  


_ What a productive date. _


	7. One Long Evening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit lewd here, but not really. Just a warning!

"Okay… favorite pastime?” I said out towards him, sat up and bundled in a blanket for warmth. Hugging my arms forward around the front of my legs to compress my form closer together for the most efficient distribution of heat. He took a moment to think, the man sitting just beside me on top of another blanket. Naofumi, my friend and Master, who only recently had turned into my ‘boyfriend,’ or at least  that’s what he said it was when I asked. He was a bit sheepish when he was explaining the concept to me but what I gathered was that it was a polite way of saying ‘lovers.’ I was considering this even as I posted my question to him. It was strange to think about, but despite being so close there was still plenty we  didn’t know about one another.

  


“I suppose before coming here… I was something like an otaku.” His expression was saying that he was embarrassed, his eyes drifting over to me for… something. But I was still wholly invested in his words, even though I had no idea what an ‘otaku’ was. The way he said it made it seem negative. He sensed the question on my lips before I could even sound it out. “ Basically, that means… that… I read a lot of manga and played video games in my spare time.” His features remained on me but his expression was turned, looking quite unsure in the explanation he gave. “Manga being a kind of… ‘literature,’” He tilted his head just a bit and let his left hand come up to the back of his neck. “Then video games were like literature too sometimes but you didn’t read it… it’s more like an experience?” He dropped his hand and  muttered something out under his breath. 

  


“I think I understand, these… ‘Mangas’ are like story  books...? ”

  


“Yes!” 

  


“... and ‘video games’ are like… story books but an experience.” I felt genuinely confused about these video games,  it seemed you could experience story books already. Was it anything like the experience we earn here through leveling up? Thinking about it like this was forcing my features to  scrunch down dangerously. I only noticed when Naofumi cleared his throat to grab my attention again.

  


“Kind of, it’s hard to explain you’d just have to see them for yourself.” I rolled my head over to gaze at the sand off to my left. Nodding absently as I continued to try and decipher these activities, my faraway gaze  didn’t last as I turned towards him again. Catching him looking at me with an uncomfortable turn on his lips as he moved to talk. “How about you?”

  


“Well I like reading!” I said  immediately , feeling it was the closest thing I had to a pastime that  didn’t involve  maintaining my equipment. There was also daydreaming, about crazy nonsense scenarios but could that be considered a pastime? Contemplating this made me slowly frown, I remember reading a lot when I was younger but now it was all  in an effort to improve myself. To learn, academics in place of enjoyment… well it  wasn’t as if I  didn’t enjoy it-

  


Suddenly the feeling of cold fingers poking the side of my face interrupted those thoughts. I jumped in place as my expression jerked over to him as he brought me back to reality. “You look a little lost in thought.” He said gently towards me, those digits of his trailing back just a bit to smooth along the edge of my jaw. His eyes  weren’t looking right at me as he was doing this, an unfamiliar cool chill flowing down my spine. Making its way into my tail, setting it on a firm sway as my eyes rolled from his avoiding gaze, down his torso and back along the arm held out towards me. I felt warm beyond the  woolen confines, my face feeling heated despite the growing continuous breeze.

  


I had my hands secured in the blanket, keeping the breeze off me. But feeling his fingers against my skin made me…

  


“Naofumi… you’re cold.” I stated, looking up at his face as he looked at mine. That once strained expression now drains down into a somber one as I cut out his illusion of ‘not being bothered.’ I released the interior of my blanket without much hesitation as he drew his hand away shakily as one firm breeze prickled up the  bareness of his arm. The goosebumps were an unflattering terrain along his limbs, the soft hair standing at attention as the bits exposed to the air prickled. I slipped my arms out from the top of the blanket. Letting it slump down around my midsection as I swiftly caught Naofumi’s arm in my hands.

  


He  didn’t pull away, instead relenting into my hold as I  witnessed his eyes unconsciously lounge down towards my chest, still clad in my bathing suit. Seeing that made a fluttering sensation set itself in my stomach, but that was trivial compared to the way his arm felt in my grip.  Almost ice cold, it made me worried.

  


“Raphtalia…”

  


“You have to be freezing!” I exclaimed out now,  somewhat upset . Though even to me it felt like I was playing up my tone to seem just that bit more concerned, more than I already was. Releasing his arm before I let my hands come down to the covering around my waist.

  


“Wait Raphtalia!”

  


“Stop talking, Naofumi.” I cut him off sharply as I unbundled myself and unfurled the fabric towards him, still claiming a side for myself so it became  crystal clear that I was offering to share in the warmth. He blinked at the offered edge and then to me, I gestured with the fabric clasped in my right hand out to him which he slowly took from my grip. I laid down after he took it, slumping back then rolling onto my side to look up towards him as he held the blanket marked with hesitation. I brought my arms to lay just ahead of me in the  somewhat small breath of space between us both. He knew my intention, there was no need to reinforce the notion.

  


Naofumi remained silent as he set himself back onto the ground alongside me, staring up at the sky with tiny flicks of his gaze over at my shape. He brought the blanket down onto himself, covering the shield along with his right arm which he had it braced on. I drew up my side as well in response, using my left hand to pull the  hem up around my torso as to even out the rationing of warmth. It worked better with more body in it anyway. Though Naofumi looked a little uneasy with the blanket nestled over his chest just below his chin.

  


“There, happy now?” He said with the tone of a pouty man, though his face betrayed no displeasure at the situation. He was  very good at pretending to be  averse to something, my hand found itself tangled along his underneath the covering. We clasped onto each other eagerly and only then did Naofumi lay his head to the side towards me with a warmth plaguing his features.

  


“Yes, I am indeed happy now.” He rolled his eyes which gave me just the amount of time I needed to slip  closer up to him. I kept his hand in mine as I did so, bringing him against me so suddenly too. He seemed to freeze up as those rolling eyes focused dangerously down at me with an unforgettable mix of terror. His shirt was still damp and stung into my skin like a sapping spell but I hardly minded. The  dampness of my own hair was constantly lashing against the whole of my back still, reminding me of the chilly nature of the evening. This newer sensation against my breast was no  great change .

  


If we were  standing, I'd be leaning into him on his left, setting myself completely against him with only our arms and clothing standing in defense. He would adjust himself, rolling his held hand against mine to create a more comfortable setting. But inevitably the way I had brought us made it almost impossible to keep our hands clutched comfortably. Eventually Naofumi brought his hand over his stomach ending the hand holding but  permitting me to rest my left arm over his torso, my right hand only curled up underneath my head to prop myself. We found an agreeable position before settling with one another underneath the blanket. Dancing my hand over his belly and torso in a vicious cycle of pressure along his body.

  


He  didn’t seem to mind as the conversation invariably led on, without a word of our now cuddling state.

  


“It's my  turn, right?” He asked, those eyes of his wandering with the words but returning to my own as I nodded. He blinked in understanding, shutting his gaze as if the act of looking at me distracted. “How about… what are your dreams like?” I pondered that for  a brief moment .

  


“Calm…” I  muttered to Naofumi’s  quizzical look before continuing. “Mostly about a life after the waves, about the smiles and… and…” I trailed off, gulping my shame away that I  couldn't hide from Naofumi even if I really tried.

  


“A family?” He finished for me and I nodded. I found a comfort as my hand seized up a stretch of fabric on his torso. “Your family?” 

  


“N-no, just ‘a’ family, whole and together without fear.” His expression drooped at my words, I found myself denying that feeling of sadness however. Leaning in to mark that sad pair of lips with my own. “It's not a sad thought, it is always a good dream.” I said it against his skin, pulling back to rest on my arm once more as a surprised Naofumi settled his look. “Now how about you Master?” My arm curled in over to sit across the top of my scalp. 

  


“Well, I don’t dream much I suppose.” He said, pulling in his bottom lip, thinking.

  


“Huh.” I scoffed sharply up towards his wandering eyes, forcing their green shine back to me with the noise.

  


“What?” He sounded almost offended, or  maybe I sounded offended.

  


“I hardly believe such a  bold-faced lie.” I huffed, drawing myself away from him just a tad, pressing more into the hard feeling covering beneath us. Separating the particles of sand from our forms. He rolled back to set his eyes on the sky once again, huffing out that gnawed on lip with a tiny smile on his face. But it  wasn’t long before Naofumi twisted over, setting himself on his left side to face me completely. He tilted his head to rest towards the ground as his damp hair flopped around weighted. His shoulder was baring most of his upper body while he sat there, properly turned towards me underneath the blanket.

  


One small fantasy playing about a  far-off possibility in a large double bed… or even one of the dingy singles they used in most  off-road inns. I was thinking that it would look just like this, except warmer and  tinged with candle light.

  


“Don’t know why I would try to hide anything from you.” He  muttered with a sour expression. But the warm shine in his green eyes was enough. “Truth is… I  can’t remember them  overmuch , when I wake  up, I tend to focus down on the tasks for the day. There is hardly time for anything else.” His arms pulled forward, his fingers just barely present towards my front, my sense of space invaded as those digits pulled on one another as he recited. 

  


“That’s… understandable.” I said uneasily, an unconscious shiver hissing its way down my spine that made me wriggle uncomfortably for a moment before it quickly subsided. His body was slightly  askew now, with his shoulder pulling forward to accommodate his forward hands, his figure  seemed to sink greater against the sand.

  


The blanket did its part to hide the cold and unconscious nervousness of my body. Though I  wouldn't put it past Naofumi to notice.

  


“I remember the nightmares.” He said suddenly. His voice became low, harsher. Only briefly but like many times before it was there, the anger and fear undercutting everything. “Like  I'm back  _ there _ at the beginning again, or we’ve failed. I guess it doesn’t really matter.”

  


“They are just  dreams , the nightmares especially.” His eyes flicked towards mine with a familiar intensity. I averted my own eyes just for a moment before I slipped my form closer towards his, for whatever reason I  hadn't noticed his shield was removed from his arms. Hidden away somewhere on his person but it  wasn’t here sitting between us.

  


“I can’t hear the waves anymore.” He says, trailing his gaze along the side of my cheek. As he watches I use the opportunity to bring my hands up to his face, stifling my right hand along under his head as my left caresses the top along his cheek. He snapped to attention as I held him, softly smoothing my fingers on his features.

  


“It's like we’re truly alone huh?” He was right, I assumed that  maybe the blanket was catching the sound as it came up, but that was just a guess. He nodded into my palms and I just left my hands sitting there on his warm face, soothing presses into the muscle as his expression relaxed completely. 

  


I recognized it, the look he became  enthralled into with my hands around him. 

  


He looked like he knew he was safe, here with me under a blanket. Closer like lovers but somehow more unified all the while.

  


_ What do you call  _ _ this...? _

  


Perhaps it was all foolish, initial feelings blinding oneself to the truth of a situation. I had felt a way so long,  maybe I don't want to remember feeling any other way . 

  


_ I  _ _ don’t _ _ care. _

  


That’s what I told myself when I began doubting, those thoughts that said it was too good to be real, that none of this is true. I simply  didn’t care to see the alternative, or what my doubting thoughts would consider to be the truth. My left hand drew away from him only to be met with a turn of that delicate face. Chasing the fleeting sensation of my palm.

  


His head turned out and found my hand grasping along the shoulder, Naofumi paused as his chin found the top breadth of my fingers. They formed around the edge of his shirt, rolling the grip over the damp fabric as his gaze came back towards mine. 

  


I was watching him the whole time, seeing how his normally scrunched face relaxed, panicked then relaxed again. All in response to a simple removal of my hand, he hid it well. My right hand drew back from the area beneath his head to instead come against the broad front of his torso.

  


“I don’t think…” He started but stopped. The gentle wave of his throat expressing all those words he would rather swallow. I pressed my left hand against his shoulder, drawing myself closer than ever to his body. The heat was greater than before, not much so but there was more. “... Raph.” He whispered, as my fingers toyed on the strings around his collar. Tangling the digits into the  twine forced Naofumi into action with a quiet response to my advance.

  


His palms found purchase along my  sides; I slumped a bit up to allow his hold along my right as well. A harsh tremble set itself up my body, the kind that trails prickled texture all up my skin. I could feel the growing sting of altered sensations reach from my ears to my tail. 

  


“Naofumi…” I shuddered out softly in turn. “I… don’t really know what’s happening.” I admitted, directly into that green shine that never left my own. I felt terrified, my heart was throbbing in my chest and I  hadn’t noticed until now as the blood pounded in the drum of my ears. His lips moved to talk but before the noise could  escape, I took my opportunity, throwing my left leg forward around  his. Using a continued momentum to bring me to him and force him to his back.

  


I was on top of him now, with his hands resting on my hips and my skin aflame with that same need from the other night. Just much more intense, it was an itch that started just behind my eye and burned a fire in my stomach. His eyes shot open in surprise up at me, I raised myself up to look down at him properly. Sucking in harsh cool breaths as I took in every detail of this moment. 

  


My hands came to the  fastener on his shirt once again, deftly undoing the string with little resistance as his grip  smoothed up my skin. Those wandering palms forming up my sides curled under my arms to pull me down by my shoulders. Causing a sharp huff of surprise from the sudden pull downward.

  


He drew our lips together so deftly I experienced a certain lapse in my sense of awareness. I was pressed to him now, huddled in a way to allow my  hands-free reign over his clothing. The corners of my vision framed in cascading twisted strings of my hair. Framing down the sharp masculine features of my… 

  


I pulled from his lips with much surprise to myself, breathing hard on the gleaming soft skin that was Naofumi’s. 

  


“Raphtalia.” His breathing came out forced like mine, but the words he spoke were calm. “Are you okay?” His left arm slipped from my back and drew up and into my hair. Pushing the tips of those fingers against the back of my head in a gentle secure gesture. I nodded down at him rather than confirm with words. 

  


I  couldn’t exactly express that  I’ve never been  surer and more terrified of something in my life. It was… exhilarating that I felt all of this, every action  I’ve taken right now was just instinct. Some buried fantasy that came out when it was just us, like this. 

  


He had to feel the same way, his hands, his face. They all told the same story as myself. His eyes were wide but that was just to capture the memory just like my own, his breathing was ragged because he too was excited. I just understood and responded accordingly, how long have I wanted this with him. For me to unconsciously assert our desires.

  


“Naofumi…” 

  


“Raph.” The hair tangled grip drew back alongside my face, dragging those suddenly warm fingers across my skin. All the while we were a hair’s breadth away from embracing one another’s lips again . 

  


“I-I’m… I think I’m scared.” My fingers peeled open the top of his shirt just as both of his hands found my shoulders to delicately hold me. “I feel… normal… but my heart is…” Naofumi pressures me up so we can speak more properly. 

  


It was only then that I noticed how distraught our warm blanket was as it slumped down my lower back and was trapped beneath our various limbs.

  


“Can’t you hear it,” I asked… “My heartbeat?”  I’ll never know what I really meant by that, but it felt right to ask. It was so loud. My palms spilled over his bare chest and  I felt a cold string of adrenaline pump up into my body in response. 

  


“Can you hear mine?” He asked in return, his right hand sliding down my left arm palming the delightful feeling of his chest. Guiding my willing limb to a point over his heart.

  


_ Ba-da thum ba-dum thum _

  


_ Ba-dum thum ba-da thum _

  


A solid  repetitious drum that pumped like a rumbling explosion, a never ceasing shockwave feeding my senses. It felt familiar, uniquely so.

  


“Y-you understand…” I hushed down towards him as I searched his eyes for the meaning behind this. He merely nodded…

  


I  don’t remember moving in to kiss him again but suddenly I was there against him. Folding my arms down to allow as much little space as possible between us. 

  


“Mister Naofumi!!!”

  


_ No… No!  _

  


Naofumi jerked away from my lips and twisted his head up towards the shore, those tender hands of his still holding me at the shoulders as if  maybe that was just a collective hallucination. We were so  close; it was so highly improbable that we  could’ve been interrupted here when we were so far away from everyone else. 

  


I turned up towards the shore as well, a gentle suggestion of my Master’s hand enticed me to slump to his side from straddling him. Weighing back down onto the hard sand instead of a warm embrace. We both saw it, a younger man sprinting down the shoreline with the dryer sand kicking up from underneath his soles. He stopped when he was  really able to take in our situation, clearing his throat as I felt my frustration staring daggers ahead at this face  I'd never seen before.

  


_ One night alone, was it too much?! _

  


Naofumi drew from under me by slipping to the right to get to his feet, watching me with a look etched with a million different apologies. His lips pulled into a strange expression of  disappointment; despite the ruined evening those eyes still trailed my mostly bare body. That made the frustration just a bit more bearable as I brought up the blanket to cover myself in front of the stranger. Biding my time and hiding my figure for what I assume will be a short pause. 

  


As I hugged the cloth around  me, I merely nodded once up to him before slinking my gaze towards the unintentionally rude man . 

  


“What is it?” He asked,  perhaps a bit more harshly than intended. Naofumi set his stance and crossed his arms, sending a cold look I could see from the side profile I was granted.

  


“Its… well the big… filolial?” The man's eyes wandered between us both for confirmation, but at his  admittance that Filo was involved in this interruption only made me breathe out slightly louder than usual. Drawing Naofumi’s unamused gaze for just a moment, meeting it with a shrug before I moved to speak too. All the warmth in my skin turns to weights beneath the surface.

  


“Yes, Filo.” I confirmed for the man as I adjusted myself on the ground.

  


“What happened?” Naofumi followed, and something about this natural formation of conversation made me feel undoubtedly like a mother.

  


“There were some monsters at the edge of the village...” His tone was uneasy, he pulled himself back, away from the both of us bringing his hands up to his midsection to set them against each other. “She chased them off outside of the village.”

  


“ And... ?” I sighed out, sitting up in a more comfortable position as Naofumi gave me a slightly amused gaze. Probably understanding I was more than exasperated that our moment was interrupted by Filo, again. The stranger was confused by my less than concerned tone and mannerisms.

  


“Well… I mean, shouldn’t you be worried?” Naofumi took this time to take his seat beside me, I  couldn’t help but gaze over at him as he relaxed. Peering at my handy work over his torso with his  disheveled clothing and bare chest peeking through. He  didn’t fix it,  almost as if he  was refusing to ignore the moments prior to this interaction. “This Filo hasn't come back yet…” The stranger’s voice brought my eyes back to him as my heartbeat paced up from the enjoyable sight. My concerns disappearing save for this person interrupting our evening.

  


“Filo is very  capable; she’s probably just hunting.” Naofumi shrugged off any  possible concern just like myself, which was nice… refreshing I should say. “I wouldn’t be too concerned.”

  


The man shuffled his feet, more words seemed to want to spill out but I think the joint opinion we both expressed finally got through to him. “Well… okay, my apologies for disturbing you both.” With that he turned his back to us both, he was a  relatively short distance away, about the space that I took up  lying flat. So, it was  all the more shocking when Naofumi reached his hand over and buried it in my hair along the right side of my head. I jolted to attention as he  initiated first, looking over at him directly that only served in allowing his palm to hold easily. I just  wasn’t expecting it so soon after the man just began to leave, my eyes flicked over to the leaving form for just a moment to confirm that he was indeed creating more distance.

  


“Naofumi!” I hushed out towards him, my eyes flicking back to  observe him. The man in my gaze had this very unfamiliar expression, the corner of his mouth drawing up like he was smirking but his eyes were wide as could be. The darkened pupils hidden within the sharp green were wide like the  open mouth of a bowl. The look made me feel… delighted and horribly embarrassed. A momentary thought that I looked less than appealing crossed my mind, like the wrinkled open mess of his shirt that he  didn’t bother hiding from the newcomer. 

  


Like he was  flaunting our date in front of a stranger when I covered up… 

  


_ Why is that so exciting? _

  


My tail set about  its usual swaying activities, smoothing over the top of the blanket beneath me and crashing into the second blanket covering it. As my heart set a greater pace just like before the interruption,  I felt my body unconsciously draw back sitting more up on my knees so I could be a bit taller before him. My gaze moving till I could take in his entire form before me, those fingers pulling from my hair to rest more against my cheek.

  


“ Raphtalia .” He said in stark contrast to my worried tone, he  didn’t even check that the man was leaving. It was as if him turning around was enough for Naofumi, like without another set of eyes on us the world was all ours again. He removed the palm of his hand from my face, instead letting his fingertips drag lazily along the curvature. Tracing their path along to the front until they came to the plumpness of my lips, I  don't think even he was expecting his own actions. As he pushed his thumb softly against my mouth and the flood of red into my face following a fluttering  heart, he would stiffen up in front of me. The action felt like he was stalling my voice for a moment so he could say something else but the shock overtook him for a longer amount of time. “You’re beautiful.” 

Those words were entirely  dissimilar from the other night, with his thumb grazing over the wrinkled detail of my closed lips. That smirking wide-eyed expression fell away as the syllables faltered out in a falling tone. Leaving only a sad expression, those wide eyes pulling back to wince towards me as his thumb drew to the corner of my mouth. Tenderly testing the piece of my face as his change in mood sat between us like a gulf.

  


“Does… that make you sad?” I asked suddenly, I felt like I should know what he meant and what he was currently feeling. But those painted green hues puzzled me, setting whatever  possible rationale out the window. His free hand came up to the left side of me, causing my gaze to flick towards the village after the stranger once again. 

  


For a moment… something was strange.

  


But Naofumi’s hand drew me back to the current object of my attention, the sole conqueror of my heart. Whatever that means, he moved closer still holding my features in his firm grip. Staring down into my eyes as that wincing unpleasant look faded as quickly as it came, I drew away instead, setting myself back and lower on the blanket than him. Angled beneath his gaze he followed me without hesitation as I unfurled the blanket down as he advanced to hover over me.   
  


He gulped audibly, those eyes taking in my form once again as if he  couldn’t believe I was real.  I’m sure the same was true in reverse if the tone of my drumming heart was anything to go on. His left hand came down unsteadily, a subtle tremor  evident that began at his fingertips then moved on to his wrist and up his forearm. It was like he  wasn’t sure if he wanted to touch me again, or if he was scared. 

  


At this point I was only propped up on my elbows staring up at that movement, with my gaze trailing up to his features with that expression that just  couldn’t believe this was real. I set my weight on my right arm as I raised up to set my free hand to grasp onto his shirt. Suddenly drawing that man down on top of me, our lips meeting instinctively as his hand took up positions by my sides. 

  


The fabric of his shirt felt damp against the bare parts of my skin and set a soft chill  rising up my front, it was horrendously annoying rather than uncomfortable so my hand set down his front. Smoothing over the cool fabric down to its untucked  hem at his waist, trapping the edge between my thumb and forefinger as I quietly tugged up on it as we set our pace together once more. Except with my minor suggestion on his clothing Naofumi squirmed above me, drawing himself away with a minor pang of disappointment making itself known to me as I sucked in my lips for a moment to savor but it was all gone too soon. 

  


“Um, Raphtalia?” He said, the words firm down at my lips as I continually played with his shirt.

“Yes, Naofumi?” I replied, as if I  didn't know what he was concerning himself with.

  


“Are you doing that on purpose?”

  


“I suppose I am…” I set myself back on the ground completely, leaving my left hand to toil away at the fabric as I set my right across my bare stomach. Letting my eyes  flutter open to gaze up at him hovering over me, I suppose to him my hair was splayed out beneath my head and I looked alarmingly casual. But I also knew all too well that he may have been blind to the reality of my feelings, with butterflies knotting up in my throat every moment we  weren’t connected. Every second spent just  observing him was making my mind swim in pleasant memories and fantasy and it was  almost enough to set me in a daze. When we kissed, when we touched  that’s when it all made sense and I  didn't have to be so nervous. I  don’t know particularly  _ what _ made sense, I just understood that it was really him and me together, from there on it was the most natural feeling in the world. “Your shirt is cold…” I said, in a delicately formed voice that  wasn’t far off from a disciplinarian. Naofumi’s features turned a sharper red as he was informed of this fact.

  


“Sorry.” He said with an amused chuckle resting in his tone,  rising up above me with his knees resting around my legs. He set himself back on my legs for a moment, still red in the face as he watched me beneath him with my hand finding a new place to rest around the outside of his thigh. Gently pressuring the  pant leg that separated my palm from his skin, he took this short pause to huff out before bringing his arms back to peel up his shirt with a swiftness unparalleled and before I could even blink his shirt was discarded in the direction of my own clothes. His tufts of black hair whipping into place after getting brushed so quickly by the finely made clothing. Leaving him shirtless before me and for the seconds that  followed, I felt incredibly short of breath.

  


I had seen him before of course, and… admittedly, been in a similar sensation staring. But there was a marked difference between relaxing in a hot spring and having him on top of me. A  startlingly pleasant difference that made my heart pound in my chest even harder than before as my eyes trailed up and down his exposed torso, appreciating everything in a finer detailed look than I ever had before, I knew what I  probably looked like. Some hungry beast sitting beneath my Naofumi, that realization brought a certain painful calm to my enjoyment. 

  


My eyes felt up to his face again as an uncomfortable smile stretched on my face.

  


_ Is this a new kind of torture… _

  


My hand that still rested on his leg slowly inches up to smooth out along his bare side, the feeling like lightning in my nerves. I  don’t think  I’ve ever touched him this way… 

  


My fingers trailed inward to his toned stomach, appreciating the touch just as much as I had appreciated the sight just moments prior.

  


_ This is all so fantastic… _

  


Watching his face as this all happened was its own reward too,  observing the tensing pull beneath his cheek as his muscle reactively twitched in response to my gentle movement. They seemed increasingly tense as I drifted towards his waist and in contrast eased into a calmer wince as I moved upwards. His skin broke the chilling breeze, it was warm like the blankets in winter when you just put the last one to make the difference and  you’re finally able to  bask in the heat.

  


I believe that was because it was his center, the point from which most of his body was in constant operation, from the heart to his stomach. Hot blood pumping throughout, yet even still his skin  goose bumped after my fingers.

  


I assume initially that my hand was too cool but he  hadn’t said a word about it and I  didn’t imagine Naofumi was one to  bask in something uncomfortable for too long. It slowly dawned on me that it was because it was  _ my _ hand touching him, like all those times he elicited joy from me with just a simple grasp of his hand. With that I sat up beneath him, leaving my legs trapped between his as I set both my hands to gently smooth over his skin.

  


One would have imagined a marked body beneath all these clothes, old  burns and scars from the rare moments something pierced through his shield. Like that Glass woman and her Tortoise Shell breaker move, and  perhaps the other times… like the blood sacrifice. But his skin was perfect despite all that, just like the many scars I had once, faded and forgotten on the pale smooth plane that showed itself before me. Rolling my palms up to feel just that little bit more was when his own came down to grab mine at my wrists causing me to choke in shock like I had just been caught stealing sweets. 

  


_ Which I suppose  _ _ wasn’t _ _ too far  _ _ off of _ _ a comparison… _

  


“Enjoying yourself there Raphtalia?” He asked  incredulously , setting my gaze up towards him. I found him staring at me with those reddened cheeks and  furrowed eyes. Like he  didn’t totally appreciate the feeling of me inspecting his chest, I blinked up at him for a second, feeling  dumbfounded as Naofumi sat himself fully on my legs. Now more leveled to me as he waited for my reply as he gently held my hands together with his own.

  


At  first, I only nodded in response, feeling a hot sensation across my face as I was encouraged to admit my embarrassment. 

  


“Yes… I was.” I admit sheepishly, feeling a low smile involuntary form with the  admittance . He turned to look up towards the village again, his hands relaxing their hold and letting me go.  I’d instinctively set them behind myself on the ground to steady myself as I was sitting. Watching him for a moment before also looking towards the head of the beach.

  


“How much longer do you think we  have...? ” He said, and his tone seemed vaguely sad but I  couldn't really tell when he  wasn’t talking directly at me. 

  


“Not enough I think…” I said, feeling that same disappointed sense. It was getting late and that stranger interrupting us only served to reinforce the fact that  maybe we should be heading back sooner rather than later. These thoughts only lead me back to thinking about the village and the people rather than my current fantasy happening before my very eyes. The sensation of Naofumi’s hand coming under my chin brought me back to the present, his thumb coming up to press on my chin and I looked up at him. 

  


“Thinking we should go back?” I nodded sadly at that and he took the time to remove himself from my lap, swinging to my right to sit beside me again.

  


“You know what is strange?” I said softly out to the sight of the village, leaning myself over so I could rest my head on his shoulder. He accommodated me without words, his own head coming over to rest along the top of my scalp, getting my ear to reactively flick on his cheek for the daring motion.

  


“What’s that?” 

  


“I haven’t even thought about everyone else.” I adjusted myself as I said those words staring ahead at the village, it might as well have been the rest of the world for how distant it all felt.    
  


“Who do you mean, the village?”

  


“Yes… and… everything, everyone.” Naofumi turned his head a bit towards me, applying more of himself on my hair. “The world…”   
  
“I know what you mean.”

  
“Do we have to go back?”

  


“Raphtalia-”   
  


“I know… but out there, it's just more fighting and…”   
  
“But I have to.” He said simply, and I knew he was right.

  


“I wish things could be different.” Naofumi’s hand found me at that, his head drawing away as he lifted my chin and turned me to look at him. We were close, but it was marked in a different feeling altogether, I was touching him and he was touching me but it all just felt empty. His thumb cooled along my cheek, smothering a tear I  hadn't noticed. It made me aware of the burning sensation in my eyes.

  


“Things are different, but we still have a job to do.”

  


“We shouldn’t have  to; we should be able to be ourselves.” He chuckled at that, a soft painful one that filled my heart with ache. He leaned down to me and set his forehead against my own.

  


“I already feel like myself when I’m with you.” It was my turn to laugh, but it came strained out and useless. “We just have to do this, all of this, so everything can be just like this for everyone else.”

  


“Safe?”

  


“Happy.”

  


“What happens after… for us?”

  


“We can be ourselves… just like now, and all the other times we will have after now.”

  


“Forever?”

  


“Forever.” He affirmed, drawing himself to look at my glossy eyes. Smiling that smile that just told me he meant it,  happening and ending all too quickly he pecked my lips. Sealing a  promise, I think.

  


“And we can go on more dates, correct?” I said firmly, watching his happy expression grow as I said so. Feeling my own joy rise at the sight.

  


“Correct…”


	8. Dread

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain, familiar feeling.

_ Is this a promise? _ _   
_ _ Is this supposed to be what it feels like when someone gives you their word about something so… _

_ Permanent… _

_ Is this permanent? _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Or are we just lying to ourselves… _

With his affirmation that we would indeed be going on more dates after tonight I slipped my arm into his, swiftly trapping myself up against his side as those quiet sad thoughts echoed in my head. The joy tempered as usual by a harsh internal monologue, we were still looking at one another, flushed in our faces with our backs to an endless abyss of sea.

“You’re absolutely sure that we can’t stay here?” I whispered, following my words by leaning in to rest my cheek on his shoulder. Tilting my head to secure myself on the soft warmth of his skin. His right hand came up around to mess with my hair, pouring his palm from my scalp down my lengths of hair. Running his digits into the dampness that slowly faded.

“I’m sure.” He murmured along in the same tone and volume as me. The breath flowing up until it rolled through the inside of my ear, enticing that familiar twitch as he unconsciously teased me again. 

“Can we finish the bread… as some consolation for your awfulness.” I joke mostly, as it still pained my heart everytime my eyes drifted over towards the village ahead of us both.   
  
“My awfulness?!” He said it at me, somewhat pulling his head back to look down to me properly. “You’re the one suggesting we leave the world to its fate!”   
  
“And you’re the one fighting so hard to be a hero.” I backed away as well to get a look up at this contradiction of a man. His hand still held me at my head but with my movements he adjusted his hold to my shoulder, squeezing the whole of his grip around it. His small smirk shining through at my words before smoothing his palm down my arm.

“Yeah that is pretty terrible, isn’t it?” His feeling moved away after reaching my wrist, pulling back to his side. His expression turning off towards my left and at what I assumed to be the basket. “We can finish off the bread.” I felt my entire body wiggle in response to his concession, having won that tiny victory that kept us here just that few moments longer. He chuckled, watching me as I drew myself away from our interlocked position. Crawling over quickly to the basket, set on my hands and knees so I didn't need to stand. I sensed the pleasant return-to-form of my tail swaying gently behind me, not being weighed as much with water from the time we spent drying and… other things. Naofumi mumbled something unintelligible but I was much removed from being able to hear them, I figured I'd ask after returning with my prize.   
  
I set myself up a bit to free my hands to come up to the basket lid, popping it open without a second of hesitation.

“W-wait Raphtalia-“ That’s when the feeling of Naofumi grasping the end of my tail shot up my entire spine. Crinkling every sensitive muscle in response to that singular point of contact. Enticing a sharp yelp to sound itself out from my throat without any particular assistance from me. His hand instantly released and I felt my face turn vivacious shades of color as I twisted my head back towards him. 

“What are you doing!?” I almost shouted, letting the tail curl in on my left thigh as the man watching me with a now sheepish and guilty expression quickly distanced himself away from me. Showing that he meant nothing by it.    
  
“S-sorry, did that hurt?” His first concern of course, and while it didn’t…

“No! No, it didn’t…” I quickly corrected him, sensing the heightened sensitivity fade as quickly as it came as I stared towards him, keeping still mostly if it wasn’t for the trembling sensations in my muscles. With my tail tucked away from him, I felt vulnerable but still defensive which was strange. I think he picked up on that, hence the increased distance and the question of if that hurt me. “Just… you should know better.” I grumbled out and he gave a slow nod at that, those offending hands sitting firmly in his lap.

The gulf becomes wider once again.

“I know, I’m sorry.” His gaze flicked down at the blanket and with that mix of an apology and pathetic movement of his eyes I realized that I was still maintaining my position on my knees. Immediately adjusting before the embarrassment overcame me, twisting myself till I was sat with my back to the basket and facing off towards him on the furthest edge of the blanket away from me. Brushing my hands of the feelings against the tops of my thighs with a sort of finality as he breathed in to speak again. “I… wasn’t thinking, just…” Naofumi finished his words with a scoff mixed into a bit of laughter before composing himself to continue. “You’re going to think I’m really dumb…” He shook, letting his chin sway back and forth momentarily before setting himself right towards me. His shadow speckled lips releasing a long sigh, sounding raspy and worn out, like the slow croaking breath of a dying man. It seemed in his embarrassment he was clutching onto his breath, I didn't notice until this raspy air. Beyond the obvious he seemed nervous… More nervous than I'd ever assume or seen before now.

“Well… I sometimes already think that.” I say, and that earned me a smile. Those hands came together into a tight little ball before himself and looked towards me directly, breathing in sharply.

“Yeah well… this is something else probably.” I gestured my head towards the basket and he affirmed with a timid nod. I leaned back more and dragged the weighted object over to side it next to me, the lid having fallen back in sloppily after my sensory shock. I gazed at him for a moment longer as if to confirm with him that I was indeed going to open the basket at long last. Then he gave me a look that just said ‘get on with my embarrassment,’ that made me amused in turn.

I opened the basket, by carelessly tossing the lid of the thing away, spotting exactly what had given Naofumi the panic to grasp onto my tail without warning. Of course there was the waxen paper folded around the pastry waiting inside, there was also the canteens which we stowed away before relaxing with the second blanket. But beneath it all sitting at an angled stretch beneath all the mostly homely delicates that he had picked out for us both was the deep green wine bottle he had intended for me not to see.

“Oh Naofumi…” I muttered out with a delicate bit of amusement stuck on my words, dipping my hand in to push aside the pastry and take the neck of the bottle into my grip. Pulling it up and out as I turned back to him whilst setting it in my lap, resting it atop my thighs as I watched his expression sink further and further into shame.

“I know…” His head was lowered with a certain weak chortle emanating from his mouth, low enough that I couldn't see the entirety of his face. I could imagine, briefly, that his grin was one of cringing delight. Eyes wide and flicking around while his nose would crinkle devilishly at me. One of his hands came up to rub at the nape of his neck, tossing that warped image down at himself. “I grabbed it without thinking, and…”   
  
“Without thinking,” I repeated his words, mockingly, ensuring the twitch of his cheek when he knew I was going to advance on that particular blunder. “Naofumi, this seems to have taken a  _ great _ deal of thought.” My hand smoothed outside the bottle, testing the surprisingly cool craft in my fingertips. Another breeze kicked up and beat itself up the shore whipping our sides with heavy, airy hands.

The bottle itself wasn’t impressive for what was inside, no remarkable design on the exterior of a specialized product. Nor was there an exotic quality to the glassware, in fact the outside seemed to grind in protest to my grip with bumps and imperfections in the surface. It wasn’t crafted by some perfectionist but an amateur, at least the bottle, the interior I assumed was a variation on the wine Cal Mira was kind enough to provide to the village. As a gift for the Shield Hero for all his efforts in the island hot spot, bringing me invariably to think about the hot springs again. Relaxing with Naofumi and all such fantasies relevant to the time, sharply contrasting our darkened evening on the shores of a rebuilding village. 

My left hand encircled the top and drew my thumb in along the cork, gently loosening it as my gaze rose back up to him as he was now watching me. I assume with baited breath, waiting for anything from me.

“You know, I never imagined you would take a liking to wine, Naofumi.” My thumb anguished against the ready made cork, drawing the curve of my thumbnail into the softness as I spoke towards him. Drawing my sentence structure out, languishing on the syllables as I led my eyes back to the imperfect exterior of the bottle.    
  


“You know, it's not terrible, but it is just kind of pointless to drink. At least in my case.”    
  
“And yet, here I hold this bottle in my hands.” I drifted back to look at him, finding my assumed Naofumi’s look to not be that far off from the mark, except his lips. They were needlessly curved down in a mix of a frown and wincing pain. I didn’t mean my words as an offending phrase, but I was certainly calling him out for this inconsistent defense. I felt the form of a smile appear on my face as these moments dragged on and on, unapologetically teasing this poor man across from me who’s face held a scrunched up look of distress. The terseness leading to his shoulders, ripping strained muscle rising up along the sides of his neck as he pulled his hands up from his lap as if to beg the air for some relief.   
  
“Yeah, and I'm sincerely regretting it.” He released his pose and sighed out to the sky, slouching a bit as he glared at the vastness before vocalizing. “When did you become so accusatory!?” His words made my ears perked sharply and I felt my tail wriggle up around my waist, I don’t know why but seeing him react that way filled me with a confusing sensation. One that suddenly made me snort, getting me to reach up to cover my mouth and nose as to prevent it, but the damage was done. Naofumi eye’s locked down on my compromised position, his eyes glowing a bit with reflective light from the moon… and that hint of happiness.    
  
I couldn’t stop the following laughter, stifling my voice into my hand again. Amused dearly by the poor position my partner had found himself in with me. I still held the bottle with my right hand as I slowly seeped out of my fit to settle myself into a slightly more dignified poise. Just in time for Naofumi to speak weerily across the blanket.

“You are a special kind of pain, you know that?”    
  
“Worse than Filo, Master?” 

“Yes, by a mile.” He said without a moment of hesitation. I felt my tail flare up in response and I sat up, pouting at him.   
  
“Naofumi!” I sounded out, dangerously.   
  


“It's true!” He replied defensively. “Filo still listens to me.”   
  
“ _ Barely _ , I follow your orders without question!”    
  
“But Filo rarely backtalks, unlike some other woman I know.” I gasped at that, scooching myself a bit forward on top of the blanket but still careful of the bottle held in my legs to jut my foot out against him. Kicking him, playfully, for the sacrilege he was spilling.

“You’re going to pay so much for saying that, Naofumi.” I hissed out maintaining that deadly tone, the debtor before me only letting loose a devilish smile that just said he understood. His eyes shifted to my leg for just a moment before I drew it away again, all of these things bringing us closer to each other, thankfully. My stifling hand came to the neck of the bottle again, supporting its twin as I unceremoniously popped the cork out onto the blanket. Leaning forward towards the man before holding out the bottle to his self assured self. “Now drink, Master Naofumi!”

“M-Me!?” He stammered out at my sudden declaration, to which I nodded affirmingly towards and moved in just to force the bottle into his hands.

“Yes, indeed that would be you.” He looked at the opened bottle then back to me with a confusing filling that once grimace face.    
  
“You know this stuff doesn’t really-”   
  
“Naofumi! Just drink!” I interrupted him and with a gesture of my hand towards the item once more, he finally took the plunge. Bringing up the neck to purse his lips around the edge to take that first sip, I was staring… I saw the subtle pooling of red along the seams of his lips and the glass. He didn’t drink a lot at first, I saw the slow lowering of the bottle and I suddenly brought the tips of my fingers to the base of the item and tilted it back gently into his mouth. Which he glared over at me for as he was forced a few more large gulps before I released my suggesting grip and scooted back to plop down into a proper sitting pose. He lowered the bottle to his lap with his gaze shooting across the space at me continuously, holding the neck with his left hand while his right came up to wipe what residue alcohol stained his lips. Breathing out after a moment before speaking.   
  
“Raphtalia, what is the point of this?” I just shrugged at his words and that only seemed to frustrate him more, I sensed my ear subtly strain out as I twisted my head over towards where I remembered where our clothes were drying. I flopped over on my side and reached over quite lazily to gather it all up, taking great interest in Naofumi’s shirt, setting up a plan in my head.   
  
“Mister Naofumi!” I called over as I brought myself to stand with all the clothes in my hand. Not having to pull his attention since those eyes were on me the whole while. He spied his own shirt easily amongst the others as was indicated by the quick blink to look at the bundle and to my face. “I declare… you will  _ only  _ get your shirt back if you finish half that bottle before… I dress myself!”   
  
“What, what are you talking about-” I moved my arms to quickly part open my mostly dry shirt and yank it down over me. Pulling my head through the collar only to see Naofumi mercilessly chugging away, I dropped my skirt and stepped into it to draw it up once more before fastening it around me.   
  
“Done!” I declared and Naofumi pulled the bottle away from his mouth with a heavy gasp for air. “How’d you do Master?” The sputtering man below took a mere moment to collect himself before inspecting the side of the bottle.   
  
“You’re suddenly really cruel to me…” He muttered as he tried to gauge just how much he had finished before his shoulders slumped. Knowing what that meant, I didn't have him sound out his defeat. Instead I sauntered over to him before sinking to my knees in front of him, holding his shirt in my hands as he watched me. Confirming that the bottle indeed was not half empty, despite his best effort.   
  
“I wouldn’t say that Mister Naofumi.” He went to reach for it but I moved it out of his grip, receiving a puzzled expression, I indicated with a nod of my head towards him. He seemed to totally understand my intentions. If the color on his face was any indication, he crossed his legs firmly around the base of the bottle before bowing his head with a grumble.    
  
I bundled the shirt up to its collar and leaned in to put it over his head, having his full cooperation in dressing him and before I could really even enjoy it I rolled the fabric down his torso and left Naofumi in his outfit. The man completely flushed and averted his gaze from me, I couldn't help but just stare at him intently, this whole evening had been really intimate.    
  
_ So why do I feel so empty right now? _

“See, I can be merciful.” He scoffed at that and I drew back to sit on my legs in front of him with a smile. Which he returned, even if it was marred in a bright red flush. I reached in to steal the bottle from his lap and raised it up to my lips as well, pressing around the mouth to also chug my fair share of the wine. Or as it so happens, the rest of the bottle… I had both of my hands on the slightly weighty item. Transferring that weight to myself as I slowly finished it without a single pause.    
  
It was weaker than expected, like the wine we had the other night... but this amount was bundling up nicely in my stomach, already numbing my lips with an alcoholic fluid. Warmth pouring out from my center as it settled, I drew it away from myself with a tiny huff, bringing my fingers to brush away the residue from my lips as I opened my eyes to Naofumi once again…   
  
Looking absolutely stunned. I was able to finish the bottle without difficulty, much removed from his sputtering and gasping moments prior.

“Raph… where did you learn to do that!?”

“What do you mean?” Feeling immediately puzzled by his line of questioning as I let the alcohol buzz delightfully in my belly.    
  
“I mean… you seem to have a lot of practice drinking from a bottle.” He crossed his arms at me and shook his head in disappointment.    
  
“Awwwwww, Naofumi... are you sad that I can drink better than you?” I felt a warm giggle purr up my throat as he gave me an expression that just said he wasn’t amused by my accusation.   
  
“I’m just worried you might have a bad influence-” I reached over which forced him to quiet down as I poked his cheek. Feeling a bit flighty as I did so, keeping his weird line of thought in check.   
  
“The only influence I have is from you and my heart.” I said it rather simply and he didn’t reply, just tightening his hold on himself. Watching me with a side eye as he turned his head closer to my placed finger with a frown laced on those lips.   
  
_ That just won’t do… _   
  


I moved in on his crossed legs and set the bottle to the side atop the blanket to my right, feeling one more cool breeze roll up my arm, cold enough to raise the fur on my tail with a blistering indication that the temperature was gradually dropping. Freeing my hand allowed me to place it on his cheek, bringing my other hand to cup his face as well, he didn’t fight, he didn’t even budge. Until I leaned into a kiss with him, gently massaging my expression into his with the intent of removing that insulting frown.   
  
He tasted like wine…   
  
Or was that me?   
  
It was so hard to tell with both of us having taken our part in the bottle.

I hoped very dearly for another date in the future, one where we had nowhere to go, only me and him together… 

_ Just one night…  _

_ What would even happen?  _

_ Just… more of this?  _ _   
_   
Or something more, what would that ‘more’ mean to us.

Maybe it would mean everything… or it would just be one side to the everything I already held in my hands.   
  
_ Yes… Master Naofumi is my everything now…  _

Minutes passed, or seconds, it didn’t really matter leading up to the softness of his fingers as they came up to graze along the side of my face. Those rough fingertips made themselves known to my cheek, stoking along the skin and chin. Causing me to draw back, sounding out a silent huff in front of his lips. I refused to open my eyes for a few moments longer as if that could’ve delayed the inevitable in any way.   
  
“Should we still eat the bread?” He said, getting my eyes to flutter open in response. Not finding myself looking at him but rather at the space between us both before shifting up quickly. His hand dropped from my face and he let both of them sit in his lap over his pants, a quick simple pause following before I spoke.   
  
“No… I think we’ve delayed as long as we can…” Warm alcohol flowed through my senses while my sadness at the situation came to take over. Like the drink was propelling it more into my thoughts. I pulled completely away from Naofumi’s space and cleared my throat using my newly freed hands to start the short process of gathering up the picnic. It was quiet between us as we did so, all the warmth in the blankets sapped. As if in that moment we decided to leave the energy in our surroundings dissipated.   
  
This is kind of a weird fact about these things, you can imagine you cherish them in the moment but afterwards all you feel is the cold sting of wanting more. Just like the blankets, their purpose resigned to being contained into the weaved basket and now cradling a completely empty bottle of Cal Mira’s finest. I traced a finger along the front to test the bottle quality once again, cheapy made, to dissuade highwaymen I would assume. For some reason I felt like I heard a story about some concept like this.   
  
I shut the basket lid and took it up with my right hand, rising up from the sand with a gentle yawn as a drowsy sensation slowly started to overcome me. Was it the alco-   
  
“Tired from the alcohol?” He interrupted my thoughts, midway through my rather unattractive position. I shook my head for a moment before stopping myself.   
  
“Well… maybe, I think I'm just tired from today.” He was standing a little bit away from me, his feet climbing up the bank of the beach towards the village. “Like you, alcohol takes a bit of time.”   
  
“Well that’s just not true Raph, I can’t get drunk…” He fed me that line again and I felt my eyes roll to some extent and he just scoffed at me, then his eyes flicked to the basket.    
  
“No you can’t carry it!” I declared before he could even breathe in the air to speak, turning his expression into a mild pout as I stomped out his question. 

“You don’t even know what I was gonna say,” He crossed his arms as I walked to catch up to him. His feet carried him with me as I stepped up to his left. A heel turn in the sand got him to settle into a positive gait alongside me. “I could’ve said that it was finally time for you to pull your weight.”

“You’re terrible at lying, especially with that face you make.” I was looking ahead but I could imagine, vividly, the confused gaping mouth before he would speak again.    
  
“What face?!” He asked with slight disbelief in his tone as I looked over at him, furrowing down my eyebrows and parting my mouth into a grimace that just attempted to mimic him. The poor subject of my mockery let out a dry… fake, laugh before looking out to his left while his hands found a place on his hips. The disbelief was evident before he even spoke.   
  
“I do not make a face.” I leaned into his stance besides me and gently nudged my left side into him, pushing him so his attention snapped back to me.   
  
“You absolutely make that face.” I whispered up to him.   
  
“I’ll drag you back to the ocean right now.” He shot back and I got this sense of mild fear and playfulness from that, I put up my free hand to signal that I was done teasing him.    
  
“You’d have to make a fire at that rate, then we might be stuck here all night.” Naofumi suddenly had that expression that he was considering the option and I looked ahead with a sigh.   
  
“What?” He sounded out next to me.   
  
“I know you’re thinking something weird.” 

“No!” He said, unconvincingly. I shook my head with a chuckle, the flow of conversation dying down as we both kind of walked there with our mutual understanding. It wasn’t awkward in the silence now, and shortly we came upon our discarded boots. Yet there was one puzzling thing about the path up to our shoes. I pushed my foot down into the sole of my own after ensuring no sand was going to clutter up the interior and after it was laced up I spoke out.   
  
“Where’d that man come from?” I asked out into the open air between us, blinking over to the side of his boot as I stood up to do the same to my other shoe.   
  
“Well, with the new arrivals right?” He paused tying his own boot, glancing over at me assumedly for just a moment before continuing on.   
  
“No, I mean… There's only our footprints here.”

“Is that strange..?” He finished with his footwear before me likewise his assumptions, I saw out of the corner of my eye that his feet turned back towards the sea and he gave out a huff. “His footsteps head up the shoreline.” He spoke just as I finished up with my boot, standing up and following his gaze down towards where we came from. Seeing an alternate set of tracks that went off towards the left at our perception, the distrubed sand casting small mounds of shadows that betrayed their position in the low moonlight of the night.   
  
“That is towards the housing…” I sighed out, it must’ve been nothing, why were we even considering this in the first place? I turned myself in place back towards the village, glancing over at him so he got the idea, which he did. Naofumi and I continued onward into town, talking about that thing and the other thing. My right hand settled naturally in the space between the handle and lid of the basket. Stabilizing it along my side as we walked along.   
  
“Any plans with the bottle now that it’s all empty?” He asked, finally pulling his shield to brace along the top of his left arm.    
  
“Well you know we save the empty ones, correct?”   
  
“Yes, I do.” He responded courteously.   
  
“Well, we typically send them to brewers to recycle the bottles themselves.” I explained, glancing at the basket when I did so, by extension to the empty bottle within.    
  
“Really?”   
  
“Yes!” I glanced over to him, seeing his expression heading forward, heading on to the gravel pathing that found itself under our footsteps. “Brewers actually tend to favor trade deals to villages that turn in old bottles, It helps mitigate cost between shipments of alcohol.”   
  
“Mitigating cost… that’s all that got through.” He said, shaking my head at his dry tone before I looked forward. “I didn’t realize that we pay for consistent alcohol shipments though, when did that begin?” I felt my tail curl up nervously at my back and I released a weary sigh as we were nearing the outside of our tent.   
  
“Well…” I hesitated.   
  
“Is it something you did?” I sensed him crossing his arms off to my side which only got me to stare far away from his position. “I can see your guilt.” I grumbled, audibly and twisted to look back at him as my hands came back to cover my weirdly traitorous tail. Pouting up at Naofumi while his eyebrow maintained a raised stance down at me.    
  
“It’s only for the workers, and the cost is negligible at the moment.” The Shield Hero huffed sourly at my reasoning before continuing.   
  
“It’s negligible because that’s  _ my _ money you’re spending.” He was very clearly not angry, but the minor frustration was evident.   
  
“ _ Our _ money.” I corrected his sentiment.   
  
“Since when!?” He said, mouth half open with exaggerated shock.   
  
“Since… because!” I stumbled out, which earned a growl from him. Leading to the man uncrossing his arms and bringing his hand up to his nose to clench firmly at the bridge. He had no counter for my claim over the money we had earned… of course if he really wanted to he would have a very firm case to keep it all for himself.   
  
“The debt I'm incurring from you.” His terse tone was still playful as his eyes opened from behind his resting hand.   
  
“I’ve paid back my expenses seven-fold, Master!”   
  
“Maybe so… but you haven’t actually told me how much these shipments are costing us.” I felt like I was preparing for that exact question. I turned on my heel before moving on to the tent, Naofumi followed along with a hurried step. Talk of expenses shouldn’t be openly discussed in the air and he understood this as well. We let the flap fall behind us and I trailed myself towards the center of the tent before facing on back to him.

“Eight silvers.” I happily proclaimed, removing my hands from my tail to let them cross around my torso. I locked the grip of both my hands over my forearms and looked quite smugly at his face. He returned the expression before relaxing his arms to his sides in deference of my pride.    
  
“Now you seem truly amazed by that number.”    
  
“Well that’s because I utilized that mercantile sense you are always so verbose about using.”   
  
“Is that right?” I nodded and looked off to the side for a moment, humming softly in my throat with a smile.   
  
“Want me to tell you how?” Naofumi took a moment to think but nodded at me, setting his hands on his hips. “Well… did you know that a ten bottle shipment of wine from the local state is sixteen silvers? This is subject to change of course depending on road security and distance.”   
  
“No, I didn’t know that.” He played along with my tone and he earned a wry smirk for that.   
  
“Well, seeing as you’re the Governor, the winery was kind enough to knock two whole silvers off as a given. That’s fourteen silvers, are you paying attention?”    
  
“Yes I'm paying attention.”   
  
“Fourteen silvers.” I reiterated. “Now, you are aware of the trade-in deal, now usually every two weeks the workers will go through about five or six bottles, now the winery actually only pays out about twenty to thirty coppers for any one bottle. This mostly depends on the quality of the glasswork and durability. If they believe the bottle will be more likely to break on the way to the delivery they will actually refuse trade-ins.”   
  
“This winery uses dirty, old bottles from random villages?” He interrupted, inquisitively.

“They sanitize them, Master. Mixing previous batches of wine together actually tends to hamper quality of any particular vintage. I believe they use a technique of steaming? I’d have to ask about that.” He brought me off track, I cleared my thoughts and continued. “Anyway, from the trade-ins they give about a silver and twenty coppers in total typically, knocking a whole other silver off seeing as we send our bottles with the caravanner.”    
  
“A lotta thought, just trading for wine…”   
  
“Because I knew I would have to justify it to you at least once, stop interrupting.” Naofumi shook his head before gesturing with a nod to continue. “We are at thirteen silvers, now I bet you didn’t know that any one bottle of this local winery cost only a single silver. About eighty coppers if you go there yourself to buy it, why the whole six silver markup for shipping to the village?” I asked towards him, but the childish Naofumi kept playing like he was mute. “You can answer when I ask you something.” 

“Because of the shipping?”    
  
“Because of the shipping. So what does a shipment of ten wine bottles cost us if we buy it right from the winery and ship it ourselves?”    
  
“Eight silvers.”    
  
“What..?” I muttered, having the steam knocked out of my explanation.   
  
“Well… if a bottle costs eighty coppers from the winery and we are cutting out the shipping costs. Then it should be eight hundred coppers or eight silvers per shipment. Which means… that you should actually be spending less.” Well… he just completely took over and now I was lost.   
  
“There were supposed to be ten silvers there…” I was very much confused now, seeing as the math was very complete when I first considered all these factors. “They charged us ten silvers when I first set up the deal, before offsetting the cost with the silver and twenty coppers from the trade in.”    
  
“Oh… then they were just marking up the price for bulk orders.”   
  
“They can do that?” I questioned softly, which he nodded along to.    
  
“You’ve seen me do the very same when we were selling to needy villages.”   
  
“I just thought that was you being greedy!” I huffed out sharply. “And we aren’t in need…” Naofumi had to take a moment to laugh at me in my current predicament, sighing in after his fit to speak.   
  
“Obviously the winery considers that very differently. You didn’t think it was weird?”   
  
“No…” I bite the inside of my cheek at this time. “Well… anyway we pay eight silvers in total, a whole half off-”   
  
“Twenty percent really-”

“Naofumi!” He raised his hands up in defense of himself. “Yes… twenty percent off… meaning eight silvers.”   
  


“Yes, eight silvers.”   
  
“Cutting down from shipping was the right call so I’m still saving eight silvers!” I said firmly at his face, which just glowed with this weirdly proud aura.    
  
“I know, I know!” He chuckled warmly, finding the time to subtly approach me as the whole explanation was sounded out within the tent. He offered his arms when he was close enough and I couldn’t form one second of resistance within myself at his smug invitation. Sauntering forward and into his embrace that latched around me with a gentle hold. “By the way… where do the extra eighty coppers come in to make it eight silvers?” He sounded that softly by my ear as I grumbled in his arms. Firmly pushing into his hug with my arms crossed and subsequently squished between us.    
  
“We trade them some fish for their workers… only two medium sized ones.”    
  
“Two medium sized fish are worth forty coppers each?”   
  
“Fresh catch is highly lucrative… and our sailors are really talented.” At that he finally moved his head to rest against me as well. Clutching up against my entirety.    
  
“This is strange…” He muttered.

“I know what you mean…”   
  
“You do?”    
  
“Yeah, you’re the Governor of a fishing village and you haven’t learned the market price of fresh catch.” He scoffed at that before continuing.   
  
“That’s not what I mean… yesterday night I was planning to scold you for having feelings for me.”   
  
“And now you’re wrapping me in a hug… after our first date. Speaking of…” I shrugged down the basket that had been looped on my arm and provided a sizable barrier between us. Letting it flump to the dirt before slinging both my arms around my love.    
  
“Right… do you think that I always loved you like this or?” He mumbled softly which got me to pause, turning my head towards the broadness of his torso, somewhat pursing my lips up against the softness of his shirt before turning my head up at him. Finding him turned down towards me as he waited for my answer.   
  
“I can’t know that.” I said plainly. “It’d be nice if that was the case but I can’t say for sure… what does the past matter when it can be just us, right now?”

“I guess it doesn’t.” I nodded, somewhat limitedly into his chest before he leaned down and planted a soft kiss against my forehead. “I think I did.” He muttered against my skin.   
  
“Yeah?” It was his turn to nod, limitedly of course while he was against me.   
  
“Just, kind of weird then how everything got so jumbled.”   
  
“Yeah it is weird.” This whole time we were hugging each other. Wrapped up in each other's body heat much like on the beach, which made me suddenly realize that it was cold in the tent. A subtle chill moving up the back of my neck as I drew away from his chest. His eyes followed my receding form before loosening his arms from around my back. Doing the same as I drew my palms to form up along his sides with gentle pressuring suggestions. “It’s probably going to be another stormy night… do you think it would be necessary for a fire tonight?”    
  
“Well if it’s going to be storming like you said then…” I clicked my tongue softly at that following statement.   
  
“You’re right, we will just have to settle” I grumbled at him only to get his hands to come up the sides of my face as punishment, squeezing onto my features delicately.    
  
“Yep.” He said dryly, still holding my cheeks. Thumbs gently smoothing along the sides of my expression with a pulling feeling ebbing into me.    
  
“Naofumi.” I mumbled out, feeling my speech slightly warbled as he continued to play with me.   
  
“Hm?

“What’re you doing?” His hands paused and those eyes of his switched off to the other side of the tent.   
  
“Is it uncomfortable?”

“No, I’m just curious is all.” Naofumi formed his own expression tightly, still staring off towards the truly interesting burlap siding. His lips drew into a thin line of shame as the question made its way through his head. “You’re doing something weird aren’t you?”    
  
“W-what!?” Naofumi sputtered out towards me, his hands unwilling to recede. “Not at all!”   
  
“Uh huh.”    
  
“I swear!” His eyes almost pleaded with mine to take back my ‘weird’ comment. “Your face is nice.” He muttered out, receiving my blinking eyes in response.   
  
“My face?” I echoed out, confused for sure at this point to which he only nodded to my words. Surely, however his words started to make sense to me and I felt my front start to heat up. Especially in the parts he held which he was sure to notice at this rate.   
  
“You’re heating up.” His thumbs started up again and I grumbled softly, pushing over and into his palm as he squished my features.    
  
“Don’t bring it up.” I scowled up at him, which he squished into a pout.   
  
“Why not?” He asked my pouting face.   
  
“Because… it's embarrassing.” He chuckles with my voice coming out slightly warbled from my scrunched look. My hands suddenly removed from his sides and coming up and around his, he took the hint and pulled them from my face to meet both of mine at the point between us. Holding onto one another in the continuous quiet of the tent.   
  
“I suppose it isn’t nice to embarrass girls.” He flashed an unnatural feeling smile, something that fit the Spear Hero better than my Naofumi. I think I momentarily looked disgusted because that smirk disappeared instantly. “Sorry.”    
  
“Never make that face, Master Naofumi…”   
  
“Sorry, never again.”   
  
“Filo might catch us at this rate…” I said slowly, following our agreement to never  **ever** smirk in that way again, sighing out in disappointment.   
  
“Would it be so bad if she did?”    
  
“You want her to say ‘Big Sis is mating with Master!’ to anyone and everyone?” His eyes wandered off towards the wall behind me, a thoughtful look maring his features.   
  
“But… we haven’t  _ mated _ yet.” I felt the color appear on me almost instantly as the thought made its way through my body.   
  
_ YET!? _ _   
_ _ Naofumi!? _ _   
_ _   
_ My mind was almost shrieking in delight, my body elegantly following suit with trembling nerves flowing up from my feet and throughout my system. My vision blurred for only a moment before refocusing on him with a wide grin now splitting my features. I could feel the wave of my tail before his eyes flicked to the obvious indicator of pleasant feelings.   
  
Yet, I couldn't seem to desire speaking about the topic any further. He moved his eyes from my tail and back into my own, no doubt noticing the subtle shift of weight in my stance. He had a gentle smile on his face as opposed to my wide one, I knew what he meant and he knew I understood it. Why ruin it by delving into the subject?   
  
So I merely nodded in return to that, moving to reply properly.   
  
“While that may be true… I don’t think Filo understands what it actually entails.”    
  
“You’re most likely right, besides she’s far too young to worry about any of that.” I gave him an affirming ‘hm’ at that and drew my eyes down to our embraced hands. I had mine securely curled into his palm with my thumb grazing over his knuckles as I quietly reaffirmed that idea in my head again.   
  
_ Master said ‘yet!’ _ _   
_ _ That means… sometime, right? _

_ We’ll mate and… whatever that means. _ _   
_ _ Why won’t my heart stop pounding!? _ _   
_ _   
_ “Speaking of, where is that fat bird?”    
  
“Naofumi…” I hushed out at him which only earned me a wry expression when I set myself towards his face.   
  
“But I mean it, don’t you think she’s been gone for a little longer than usual?”

  
“What is the time?” I asked, seeing his eyes turn to the right hand side of himself before muttering out something nondescript.   
  
“It’s actually really late…” He said out towards me and that got me to release his hands and take a step back.   
  
“You don’t think the monsters gave her that much trouble, do you?”   
  
“No. But it’s really weird that she’s still out there.” He had this composed, thinking expression, moving his position so he could bring his hand up to his chin. Smoothing along the skin and drawing his lips flat as a soft, missable hum rumbled up his throat.   
  
“Let’s go look for her.” I said finally and he nodded along with my words as I turned myself toward my cot and trotted along to my chest.    
  
“We should probably split up to cover more ground.” He said out towards me, the sound of his voice carrying easily over the small distance as he moved towards his own side of the room.   
  
“Thinking she might just be wandering the village?”   
  
“Looking for us, she might’ve come back to the tent empty.” While he was speaking I took the sheath of my sword, bringing it up along with the leather belt to secure it around my waist. “Expecting trouble?” I looked up at his speech and shrugged.   
  
“I’m going to check the forest first, if she’s just hung up by monsters it’ll be short work.” He nodded with that and reconsidered something at his feet before leaning down to pick up his gemstone ladened chestpiece. He considered it for a moment or two before returning it beneath his cot. Deciding against it I figured.    
  
“Be careful.” He said towards me quite suddenly, he wasn’t looking in my direction but memories of the other night played in my head. The worries he had.   
  
“We’ll be fine.” I moved across the tent heading for the doorway before stopping to wait for him at the exit. Glancing over at him as he quickly stood from his bed and came over besides me. Then Naofumi did something extremely peculiar, with his hand coming up to my wrist to seize a gentle hold on me. It stopped me from heading outside, stopped me from moving or breathing for at least a second. My eyes glanced at his hand, rolling up to his face which was oddly turned away from looking directly at me.    
  
He relinquished his grip, smoothing the fingers along the outside of my wrists until only his fingertips remained, kneading along the fabric of my sleeve. It was pensive, like a child pulling on his mothers arm while asking for something. He seized the corner of my sleeve and drew my hand a bit in his direction with it. He rolled it between his fingers and huffed out.    
  
“We’ll be fine, Master.” I reidriated and he nodded, I saw him draw in the corner of his mouth. Chewing at himself again apprehensively before sighing in a breath. “Is something wrong?” I asked softly, tilting my head a bit as if that would grant me a deeper understanding of his unusual position. He released my sleeve and shook his head, bringing his fist up to his mouth before clearing it into the muffling form. Finally facing me as I stood there, perplexed.   
  
“Nothing’s wrong.” He said firmly, before letting his eyes switch to the tent flap. Ushering me forward and out of the tent interior.    
  
Before either of us could really react to the strange air he had created we were outside, Naofumi curtly speaking to me as he took a few steps from my position.    
  
“Meet here if you don’t find her.”    
  
“Understood.” I said firmly, getting his pensive look once again before we finally parted. No more words to be shared between us as we both rushed off into the cold night air. My left hand came to grasp along the handle of my sword, that unconscious motion that made me more resolved.   
  
Something about the way that Naofumi acted had made me deeply unsure, was there something he wanted to say? It didn’t matter at the moment which I was sure he thought as well, perhaps after we found this silly bird wherever she might be.   
  
Even with that thought though, I couldn't quell the worry that started to bundle up in my stomach. Something about this whole new mood just felt, off, and strangely familiar. Stagnant evening air rested on the whole village and everything seemed to be caked in an eerily reminiscent memory.   
  
The woods were only a few minutes jog to the north end of the village, they were settled around the main road as it led off in the direction of the capital. Almost like an imposing wall of brown and green, I scanned the treeline and shortly found the telltale signs of large filolial feet leading off into the forest itself. Settling that there weren’t likely to be that Fitoria around I followed after the trail and into the imposing wood. The light fading off from the village and being replaced with the flittering moonlight making its way through the thick canopy.   
  
Dancing shadows against the deep browns that stood around me now, suffocating my sense of smell with raw earth and harsh plant aromas. The low light was little obstacle to the trail beneath my shoes, huge gashes following what I assumed was a sprinting young Filolial Queen.   
  
Eyes led from the soil and to the surrounding trees, claw marks etched the interior towards me, the shadows made them look like they were gorged outwards at something. Something that came from the treeline on a running Filolial, it was exceedingly easy to track this amount of damage like this, the moonlight dimmed down as the canopy thickened but from ahead I saw the cool blue lighting fill out the spaces between trunks. When it darkened around me I settled my eyes ahead and used my hand to stabilize my footsteps, trasping along the gashes in the bark.    
  
It wasn’t long until I broke through the trees and into an open clearing, a long diagonal one that went off from my left and right in both directions. Ordaining their splitting feature due to some unseen fire or weird logging intent. The right side headed off deeper into the forest, the left went for a bit before curving back right into its own pathing before the edge of trees blocked off the path. I observed this while my boots were crunching onto long dead leaves, left undisturbed for however long before my shoes found their fallen spots.    
  
_ Wait, undisturbed? _ _   
_ _   
_ I had just been following Filo’s tracks, and I turned back into the darkness behind me, stepping back to slip one of my hands around the back of a tree to ensure what I already knew. My hand felt the gash and I was resolved that I had followed well enough. Looking down at the ground again at the crunched bootsteps marking their obvious positioning in the floor top of brown. I crouched towards it all and stuck my hand out to disturb the top covering, looking for anything really.   
  
Then it peered through at me, the shape of a small human foot hidden as an imprint in the ground, their direction was turned towards the left and head off into the curving path.   
  
“Why’d you transform out here?” I wonder, softly at the small footprint before standing up straight and glancing off to my side at the tight oppressive trees. Shouldering a thick line of imposing woodlands all around me and the path. Thinking quietly that she might’ve gotten stuck by something while she was chasing whatever monster she was after.   
  
_ Questions for Filo... _


	9. Retribution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Retribution for happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A warning for all of you, this chapter is particularly gory and I just wanted to offer any who aren't comfortable with that subject a chance to skip over that. I've left '---' < these at the beginning and end of that section, now please enjoy!

I found Filo down the path I followed, the one that hooked right and in on itself. It was a short distance from where I entered that I found a sizable clearing in the wood. A place bereft with log stumps etched with old axe marks through their bark. Each was about as wide as the tops of barrels, though with finer smoothed lids than what could be compared to the crafted coverings. Some were cracked diagonally, clean cuts leading halfway into the stump before the wood would curve up and out sharply. 

Leaving pointed extensions of snapped trees to jut out in the open sky, evidence of a long ago logging that took place here. The stumps totaled in about a dozen, dotting the floor in seemingly equal distribution before the oppressive tree line swallowed the surroundings. Through the riddled floor and sitting somewhat center in it all was a small girl.

Her soft blonde hair marked in a silvery hue when the moon shine glossed over it. An anguishing spiking cowlick dancing on her scalp while she relaxed atop a tree stump. When I stepped into view she stretched her wings out with a long yawn of noiseless air. Her hands sit easily at the sides of herself, sealing her fingers around the edges of the stump itself, straight postured and away from the cracked vestiges as if it were a sight uncomfortable to sit against such things with her wings.

“Big sis.” She said softly in my direction, she wasn’t actually looking at me as those words rolled around her yawning expression. She did seem rather tired, sitting here in the cold dark.

“Filo, where have you been?” I started out with, the crunch of deadened leaves following my footsteps as I moved towards her position. I felt relief and moderate frustration towards the creature before me. Having made me and Naofumi worried, only to have her cheerily sitting out here in the field, hidden in the woods. 

“Waiting here?” She spoke with a confused expression, following my movements with somewhat piqued interest as I slipped between the worn wood around us. Coming upon her to look at her fully. Finding her face smudged with dirt and a leaf sticking from her silvery golden locks. I dabbed my thumb with my tongue as I reached in quickly to grasp the small Filolial girl with my hands, wiping away the dirt with a firm gesture. The much too drowsy girl grimacing sharply at my movements. “Ra-Raphtalia.”

“Hush yourself, you haven’t been bathing like we’ve told you.” I harsh out at the girl while those slightly wincing blue eyes turned a bit guilty. I knelt down, stoking out the back of her hair with my left palm as my cleaning right hand moved to hold flat along her perfect conformed face. “Master and I were worried…” I let out suddenly, looking hard at the young girl's face. She turned a soft strawberry which was quite noticeable on usually so pale of features. The eyes weighted with guilt suddenly flicked away from me and came back with elation resting in them.

“You and Master were worried about my bathing?” She played coy but she knew what I meant, I was only crouching in front of her to match her height. If I were kneeling I’d only be a smidge shorter due to the height of the stump. I pinched her cheek with my primary hand and let my other slick through to remove that invading leaf. 

“We were worried about you, dummy.” She let loose a small smile and led her head towards my pinching hand before I relinquished my hold on her. Smoothing my fingers forward and around her before I hugged her to me tightly, pushing my chin through on her shoulder and practically getting smothered by greasy hair. Her arms came up and around me to embrace me firmly as well before her tiny form spoke, the words directed at me but flowing out just at my back.    
  
“Where’s Master?” She asked, causing me to pull away after a brief moment of silence. Rolling my hands up the back of her hair to test if it was all gross throughout. It was, I fluffed up her head of hair and stood up, brushing my hands off on my shirt. Her hair fell down around her head, back instantly into form despite its messy unwashed length.    
  
“He’s in town, looking for you. We should start heading back, actually, before he gets too worried and ends up lost out here in the woods.” Filo snorted at that and hopped forward off the stump and stood properly before me. “Then you’re taking a bath.” The little Filolial stuck her tongue out at me and suddenly my chest started to hurt. She was happy and safe but the pain within me was like an unfolding vine, a pressure that was ebbing through me this whole time without my realization.   
  
I betrayed none of this to Filo though, and her weirdly innocent stature. I was relaxed now, removed from the walk here and what not. But it was so sudden I just had to consider the slowly soothing sensation in my heart. Like a serpent uncoiling itself from a strangling hold, allowing me to breathe easier even though I had no trouble before. The calm flaring up as I checked for the umpteenth time that Filo was okay.    
  
_ What is this..? _

“I’m not that dirty, Big Sis!” I scoffed sharply at her and was met with the crossing of arms.    
  
“You are, you made the whole tent smelly this morning.”    
  
“I did not, Master would’ve said something!” She retorted, quite loudly I might add. One would think that a sleepy Filolial wouldn’t have the energy but here I was.   
  
“Master can’t smell like you and me.” I only replied in my same old calm. Bringing my left hand up to grip the sheath of my sword where the hilt met, my thumb firmly molding to the back of the sword. “Anyway, that’s settled.” I turned then and kept my eyes towards her as I moved out and away from the clearing and began to head back to the village.    
  
“N-Nothing’s settled! I’m not stinky, Master would’ve-”    
  
“Have you  _ seen _ Master at all today?” I replied with a soft chuckle, cutting the younger girl off as I stopped my gait to look at her fully this time. She wasn’t moving from her spot by the stump and she looked rather flushed now.    
  
“W-well… no, not really. He was busy all day and…” She patterned her feet in the dirt as her head turned downwards at the soil. Taking in the image of leaves I imagine. 

“Well… we’re going to go to him right now.” Her cowlick sank forward and down towards the ground. Bobbing in the shifting breeze with an eerie aura filling our surroundings. The silence I could handle but it just felt really heavy at this moment.    
  
“You’re hogging Master!!” She suddenly yelled, turning her face up to mine. Her gaze filled to the brim with welling emotions, her hands had seized onto themselves, balling little shaking fists as her words hit me like a stone.   
  
“What, what-”   
  
“Don’t start lying to me!” Her voice was shrill, and the second time she spoke thin tears fell down the front of her face. She must’ve noticed because she brought her hands to wipe them away. She was shaking, a sharp sniff coming from her as I moved to talk. Holding up my right hand non threateningly as my left grew extremely tight on the sheath.   
  
“Filo, what’re you talking about?”   
  
“You both… are always gone now. I never get to see Master, or you.” She was struggling to make it through her thoughts it seemed, I assume it was the tiredness and the frustration. But these didn’t seem just like random feelings coming up in the dead of night. “You were both supposed to be here but you’re acting like… like you didn’t even know!”    
  
_ What? _   
  
“Filo I swear-”   
  
“You didn’t even check in on me today!” I got cut off again and I felt mildly annoyed with that fact. “Then I got back to the tent late and you both were still gone!”

“Filo, we were busy…” 

“I know that isn’t true…”    
  
“It is true, Naofumi and I had some work… to do tonight.” I lowered my right hand and sighed out. Feeling a wave of harsh exhaustion overtaking me as Filo’s words kept dragging me lower. The bird’s eyes staring at me, scrutinizing my expression.

“You guys never checked on me in my room either, everything is different… and…” She stifled herself with a low sob that almost broke my heart. “I don’t want to be left behind.” Following the attempt on my heart with something that completely shattered it. The child in front of me now crying with her tears dribbling to the soil. “I-I’m sorry… for not bathing…” She let out at the sight below her, her stature growing more and more meek with every passing word croaking from her mouth. The tightness grew in my chest once again, and I felt sadness welling up in my eyes but no words really found their way to my lips when I was watching her.   
  
I couldn’t talk, nothing truly satisfying for either of us anyways. I rushed in despite the lack of words and took the girl into my arms again. Hushing soft comforting tones by her ear as I clutched the small child to me.    
  
“Filo… it’s okay,” I softly let out a drawn ‘shh’ beside her, trying to soothe or anything that would reduce the tender feelings wracking her tiny body. Her hands came up my sides and clutched sharply on my shirt as she buried her face into my front and started weeping. Due to her movement I had to look down at her scalp now, watching her shake and seize up with every harsh tone escaping her lips to only be muffled by my shirt. My hands returned to a sort of memorized movement, stroking down her back and smoothing soft circles into her clothes. The other secured around her waist. “I swear to you, that is not happening.”

“Please don’t leave me behind…” The words were crushing almost. Muffled and ebbing into my shirt and then my skin.

“Filo… we won’t ever leave you behind, it’s okay.” I reassured her, getting only her tiny hands squeezing tighter on my shirt as response. “Master…  _ we _ both love you, we’d never want to leave you behind. No matter what.”   
  
“Really?” She hushed into me.   
  


“Really.” Filo pulled her wet covered face to look up at me, following her motions with a sharp sniff. “Really.” I repeated down at her watery eyes. It was then that I was reminded of something my mother used to do, a type of thing to relax or comfort me. I moved my hands up to her head, cupping her at both ends before drawing forward to gently kiss her forehead, getting the cowlick to tickle angrily at my face for such transgression.    
  
I think it kind of stunned Filo for a second, because when I drew away to look at her, the tiny transformed bird blinked slowly at me. Slowly faltering tear lines stuttering along the front of her face, leaving dull grey lines from where chance took them away to her chin.    
  
“Do you believe me?” I uttered, drawing my thumbs around to gently wipe away the desperate, distraught trails. Cooling the tips of my thumbs in the process. She nodded, only once which was enough proof for me.   
  
“Y-yes… Big Sis.” I gave her a wry smile for that, feeling much more like her mother than any ‘sister’ should. Which may not be so far from the truth anymore as fate would have it.   
  
“Things,” I paused, looking away from the Filolial I had co-parented and off to the suffocating tree line, hoping in vain that something would draw our attention so I wouldn’t have to continue mimicking my mother. “Things are different now.” I pulled myself back to look at her. “This place… it's a lot of work for Master- um… Naofumi and I, and I'm truly sorry neither of us noticed you in pain.”    
  
“It’s okay…” She said sorrowfully, leading her eyes in a defeated manner before I could continue.

“No, it is not. It won’t ever be okay to ignore your place with us, and you can always talk to me or Naofumi if you  _ ever  _ feel this way again.” I was speaking so firmly it could be misinterpreted that I was disciplining her. But those now fully invested eyes told me she understood what I was saying. “We have a lot on our minds now with the village, but one of those things includes you… so…” I stumbled finally. Unsure of where I could draw from my experience with my own mother to ration out an explanation for being so awful of a parent. My eyes drifted again, trying to find the words I could say, but Filo interrupted my skewed gaze. Reaching up from gripping my shirt to emulate my hands-on-the-head move. Well, due to our positioning she had to hold at my cheeks rather than my whole head.   
  
“I understand Sis!” Her tone did a 180 and came right back to the typical cherry Filo I’d known all this time. Maybe with slight warbling under her vocals as punishment for crying so hard. Not to even make mention of the tear stains that persisted passed my smoothing thumbs. The way she looked, turned right around from being sad or frustrated with me. It almost made all the hardship up till now worth it, but still a weight found itself resting in the bottom of my stomach drawing me down with all its infinite heaviness.    
  
_ Do you understand? _ _  
_ _  
_ _ How could you? _ _  
_ _  
_ _ I don’t even understand… _ _  
_ _  
_ “Heh, then you’re doing better than me.” I brought my thumb around to smudge that dark grey on her face before breathing in shakily. “Why don’t we head back now, I’m sure Naofumi is losing his mind.”    
  
“Really? Then… should we wait a little longer?”   
  
“Filo.” I replied curtly at the bird as we separated ourselves, she let out a bright giggle that made me smile despite the implications.    
  
“I was only joking, Raphtalia!” I brought my left hand to my hip with a shake of my head as she let loose a wide yawn. “Ah… I’m tired, I wanna sleep.”   
  
“Then it sounds like we’re heading back.” She nodded along with my sentiment and I indicated with my head to get moving. Falling in line alongside the filolial as we navigated through the logged area back towards the path we had both taken to get here. But something struck me as I looked over and down at that bobbing silvery scalp with an accompanying trembling cowlick. “Filo… what were you doing sitting out here for so long?”   
  
“Oh! I was waiting for you and Master.”   
  
“I remember you saying you were waiting…”   
  
“Someone told me you wanted to meet me.”   
  
“Someone in the village?” I looked ahead as we rounded to the long straightaway in the woods, trekking back to Filo’s tracks.   
  
“Yeah…” She interrupted herself with a yawn. “One of the new people.”   
  
“Huh,” I let out softly while trying to piece together why someone would want Filo out here in the forest. I worried about her safety but not, per se, her safety with the local monsters as she was simply a more skilled and higher leveled fighter. But it was very unsettling. “Filo, could you point out who told you to wait out here?”    
  
“Uh huh!” She answered without hesitation and my left hand came unconsciously to grip along the top of my sheath. Something in my instincts told me this was going to be a long night.   
  
Filo had taken the initiative and led the way through her previous path back to the village, stepping assuredly through the deep dark brush. Ahead of us both shined the soft glow of orange torchlight shining at us like the golden reversal of silvery moonlight.

Filo stumbled forward out and into the clearing closer to the edge of the village, drawing out a soft yawn as she twisted around to watch me following. I didn’t stumble as she did, but I did watch her in return.

“What’s the matter?” I questioned her.

“Can we all…” She hesitated for one barely registerable second before finishing her thought. “Can we all go for a picnic? Like the old days…”

“Sure, I think Naofumi and I can get out of managing the village for one afternoon.” Filo released her trademark expression and it was that moment that it crossed my senses. Sharply cutting along the top of my lips with all purpose and no hesitation.   
  
_ Smoke. _ _  
_ _  
_ It ensnared my nose with a harsh wick scent, wafting through the air with heavy purpose and significance. Overpowering the natural woodlands just at my back with salty overtones lacing the deepest mark of sooty air. I knew my knuckles went white along the breadth of my sheath as the memory of this place and such a potent embalming agent assaulted the inside of my mind.    
  
I looked up so quickly it felt like my form was twisting and set on a spin. The village, laced in golden but not the golden of torchlight, raging flames licked up the tops of the reconstructed buildings. Dancing flaring ashes sailed low into the street, it was just like then. Just in the now.   
  
My heart pulsed so loudly that I thought that maybe my inner ear would burst like those long ago balloons.   
  
“Raphtalia?” The sleepy Filolial had noticed as well, and was looking on towards the village much like myself.    
  


“I want you to find Master, and help him.” I ordered sharply, glancing down at her as her gaze switched around to watch me. “I’ll be helping people evacuate from the houses.”    
  
She nodded firmly and within the blink of an eye, a large white feathered Filo appeared before me, clasped in her bright bow flowing in on the power of her mana. Her wide beak held that same common shape of her smiling face, which was only natural that my inner thoughts would rationalize the look of the bird beak to the shape of her human appearance. Just as quickly as she transformed she dashed off from my side and into the village.   
  
I hate it when my instincts are right about things like this…    
  
I sprinted ahead at the smoldering rooftops and felt the air grow heavy with heated currents flowing down the spaces between the hardened exterior walls. Bouncing off each other and filling the space with warm choking smoke, the soft sea side breeze didn’t help matters one bit as it would constantly feed and stoke the inner hungry ravenous flames. Several times before the sight was removed from the edge of the rooftop I saw them flare up and consume eagerly of the fresh air fed to them with every cool breath the coast exhaled.   
  
“Everyone, fire!” I called sharply to the buildings around what could be considered the main reconstructed residential district, and I quietly considered the cause of this sooty rising stack of air filling my lungs with harsh memories. I rapped my knuckles on one of the homes quite loudly, getting the door opened by a very grumpy man a few moments later. I backed away and set to repeating my sharp call and front door knocking on all the houses in the area.    
  
Each house was settled an agreeable distance away from one another but with every moment that the flames persisted there was a chance of fire spreading to other buildings. Right now my concern was evacuating civilians from their homes.   
  
“What’s happening?”    
“Fire?”    
“Quick, get my mothers-”   
“Ah Gosh, maybe one of the ovens?”    
“We need to get water buckets!”    
  
The collective vocals of everyone in the surrounding area was filling the interior of the street quite quickly, leaving only for me to draw their attention towards the safer parts of town. Lying invariably along the outskirts and away for the buildings. I felt every necessary word before I could even actually think of them.    
  
“Anyone willing to help, please start drawing water to start dousing the fire. We need to act fast before it can spread!” I called out to the now dozens of bodies filing out into the streets. Many of the buildings in residential were spacious enough to accommodate a sizable family, and many more offered any extra space they could to each other to fill out and shelter some. So a diverse cast of humans and demi-humans spied around to follow with my directions without much fuss. Men were drawing buckets of water further down the street and there was someone even guiding the others in bringing them dutifully to the fire itself.    
  
They all marched with purpose, the men and women. Children even, though roused quite rudely from their sleeping arrangements had followed my words without question to find safety along the earthy edge and backed by the treeline. I remained center, observing, commanding when needed.    
  
It was all so strangely fluid.   
  
There were so many bodies filing through at one moment that the other bodies that filled out the road to the interior of the village had made no special impression on me. I was watching the volunteers, not paying attention to the shadowy images that paused sharply at the end of the road. Cutting off residential from the rest of the village.   
  
I only became aware when a voice spoke.   
  
“My… oh my! What a community we have here.” The voice came out as strong, arrogant even, marked heavily with the type of bravado that the Spear Hero exuded at times. It was such a strong feeling that it was the only comparison that I’d drawn to with so little follow-up information about the speaker. I was looking away when it sounded out and found the heads of the volunteers twist to look back in on the village, I followed their turning expressions to only be met with a most disheartening sight.   
  
A wide line of what could only be described as highwaymen, rough cloaks for shouldering the long cold of late night caravans. Harsh brutish weapons slung haphazardly along their hips with hardly a care of discipline placed into their positioning. Dark colored leathers to present a mockery of unity among their number, all in light armor as it was easier to move in. All so very familiar if I was to say anything remarkable about the band of unremarkable men that stood before me. With their rough leathers licked haphazardly by uncontrolled fire light.    
  
The sooty air ravaging their aura with a filament haze that worked wonders for their dark colored aesthetic.   
  
“It seems like you all have been working so hard, I think it's time for a different line of work for all you poor, poor souls.” 

_ Slavers… _

It was obvious, the manner of speech. The snarky, overconfident vocals flowing out ahead at all of us. The man who was speaking was standing just behind the line of men, with a Cheshire smirk lacing the front of his face. There was no way this was all of the men they had. 

There was too much overconfidence, that or they were incredibly dumb, time would tell what would be the case here. 

The volunteers made themselves sparse from the space between me and them. There were no true fighters among the residents living here which was rather… unfortunate. They knew they could trust in me, the several close enough to be considered at risk were moving to be behind. At the time I hadn’t granted the slaver the time of day with my full expression, just side eyeing him to keep my left peripheral to follow the slow moving citizens that were now solely under my care.

_ What would Sadeena do..? _

I thought to myself, I had the answers for what I’d do, but it had to be a somewhat different approach that I will be taking on this tumultuous evening.

Connecting with Filo… as a mother…

My first disagreement with my best childhood friend.

Then… my Naofumi.

I popped the sword from the sheath and took it up in my right hand before slicing the air with steel with a humming whine splitting over the gleaming polished metallic hue. I faced them completely with the tip of the blade drawing out towards the roughly hewn cobblestone road. I drew my weapon up to my offensive stance, entrapping my extension in both of my hands as I stood my ground towards the men before me.

“My name is Raphtalia.” Almost instantly the line busted into laughter, feeling the foolishness ebb off of them as if they never saw a demi-human brandish a sword. It subsided after a moment or two. “This village is under the respected governance of the Shield Hero. I ensure that not one of you will live to see the day if you raise a hand against me, or his people.” I flicked my gaze to each of their faces, I couldn’t see them. Not really.

Just animals… lecherous eyes, raspy breathing of unwashed teeth and pocked lips. Not even worth the blade. My eyes rested on the assumed leadership, his detachment of highwaymen never turned to look back on him. They look at me like a prize.

Maybe the leader understood my threat was standing more on stone than sand.

“Aye, I know who’s village this is, what makes you think that we’re not here for that express reason?”

“You were hired then?!” I accused.

“Plenty of folk are still buying you Demi-humans, despite current events being what they are.”

“They won’t get away with this, not now.”

“Hm,” he sounded out, before reaching forward on the shoulders of his men that suggested to them to separate which they obliged with no qualms. “No one cares around here when you all disappear and reappear in chains.” 

I get my teeth grit unconsciously, gnawing together in gnashing anger that grew with every syllable that escaped his dumb rotting mouth.

“Things have changed. I recommend you not take one more step and leave here. Now.” I felt a need grow within me, a terrible need.

“Even if that step is one of your people?” On cue, a section of two men parted and led forward one figure, spying immediately of olive speckled skin with warped facial bruising before being launched hard to the stone on their knees. The figure was a male demi human, tufts of mangled fur sticking from the soft bear-like ears that marked the familiar look of one man.   
  
Se’Li, not even bound as he knelt there, clearly bruised and beaten to a pulping mass of warped flesh. I could vividly imagine the group of them flooding his tent and plucking a hostage from the many other possibilities. They must’ve been watching, taking notes on the notable figures of the village.   
  
The distraction with Filo hadn’t lasted as long as they expected, neither did they expect me and Naofumi to separate to find her. So here they were taking the side of the village they thought that just maybe they would have a better chance of picking ‘merchandise’ from.    
  
Which was an assumed favorable position with me.

They really were just a group of vile morons.

**\---**  
  
Se’Li coughed harshly, and thick dark red drooled out from the assumed position of his mouth. Running down the side of his thigh and into the inner space to the road, staining his nightwear before the leader reached a hand in to grasp the locks of his head with violent intent. Pulling the grown man up by the brown hair and exposing his full, damaged expression to me. Mouth swollen and I could imagine the several missing teeth pooling in the sides of his cheeks, eyes barely conscious and fluttering closed every so often which was speckled with white stars from the painful daze he was experiencing. I felt my stance weaken at the sight.  
  
He must’ve fought back from the damage he had, they wanted to pacify him and clearly took it a bit too far. Overzealous and evil breaking of a man without a single minute of real combat experience. He was just a builder…  
  
“That’s right, if you just give up then we won’t kill this little welp here.” He was too pained to even cry. Far gone into that space where he couldn’t be hurt anymore, the anger flooded my veins and I felt it pulse up my throat as the leader smiled like he was doing me a _favor._   
  
“You’d just kill him later…” I huffed out sadly, I knew he was gone already. But it didn’t make my pain go away at the sight, these types of people don’t save ‘broken’ toys. My hands trembled around the hilt of my blade before I cut it all off. Staring ahead with a resolved glare. “I’ll kill you all, you _disgusting trash,_ there won’t be another chance.” The shaking in my limbs faded away but was replaced by the wateriness pooling in my vision, blurring the shape of Se’Li for just a moment.  
  
_Don’t look away…_ _  
__  
_ Something inside me said, don’t forget it, remember him. My instincts knew the memories of everyone who had fallen then, and I will remember everyone who will fall now. I was holding myself back, too far to dash and save Se’Li, maybe… Just maybe.  
  
The leader scoffed once.  
  
I launched my feet into action as the noise signaled the start of all that followed. I spied the dagger that slipped from his side and came down into Se’Li’s neck with little remorse, I was right there, dashing to save him as I brought my right arm under from my momentous speed and severed the the arm of the bandit leader with a frilling spittle of red from the space that the other half of him once occupied. They were so stunned with my speed that the leader was silent and watching with shock that his arm could’ve been dispatched with such efficiency to not have even been felt. The death of their hostage an afterthought to all of them.

“Y-y-you… BITC-” He couldn’t scream it out fast enough as I sent my fist firmly into his face, crushing the front of his nose into his expression before the first of his men recovered from the stunned moment. Two on my left came at me with barely drawn axes and angry expressions. The first to reach me sent his axe downward at my side which I easily drew forward away from the arc, entrapping his non-dominant arm in my left before swinging round to meet the following compatriot with the tip of my blade poking deep into the front of his exposed throat. Light fading from his expression before I twisted the blade out and firmly planted it in the back of my corralled raider’s left knee.    
  
“AHH-” He screamed, but the noise didn’t matter anymore whilst the whining vocals strained with pain became nothing but white noise. I released my sword in the man’s leg while three more descended upon me. Ducking under a ribbed baton, oval-like metal protrusions lining a shoddy oaken centerpiece, followed up by a shortsword pointed at my right side with a thrust driving it forward. The third man was another axe wielder and was following the other two in surrounding me, flowing in from my left he prepared to swing after his comrades.   
  
_ You deserve this… _ _  
_ _  
_ I encircled the thrusting man’s sword arm and cracked it easily at the elbow to get him to drop his weapon, the vibrations in the stone ebbing through my boots as the baton wielder stepped back from us two interlocked to give the left man his space to attack. Swinging wildly at my head I lurched forward with the cracked arm still in my grasp to bring the trapped bandit around my back. Invariably into the path of the axe which stuck with a sickening solution into the man’s shoulder. Enticing a yowl as it stuck within his body while I released him to move forward away from their entrapping circle. Baton man sailed forward at me once again, aiming to crack me in my skull, I wonder if they knew they were under leveled and just fighting out of desperation.   
  
_ It doesn’t matter. _ _  
_ _  
_ I side stepped his swing and caught his arm with my right hand and pulled his momentum up and out, forcing the man off balance and falling hard to the ground when his feet stepped into the new direction his arm was led. Twisting him to the floor before I smashed his face in under the heel of my boot. Breaking the baton from the now limp arm I rushed forward at the axe wielder desperately trying to free his weapon from his screaming friend’s body.   
  
**_You all die for this._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Bringing the baton up I cracked the man in the ear and sent him to the left with its force. Getting that swirling daze while the injured one sank to the floor from the weight of the buried axe, his head was bleeding at the impact and I took him forward by the collar to hit him dead center in his face. Making him limp to the ground while his friend’s screaming expression slowly turned from adrenaline marked wails to pitiful whimpering as the blood loss drained him.    
  
“GET HER!” One called, which caught my attention. I looked up at the five others remaining, one sitting off away from them dressed in a long dark robe. I hadn’t noticed him before so it was easy to assume he was hiding until now. I was standing between multiple heaps of useless animals, striding over to the incapacitated bandit and drawing my blade from its resting place and gliding out from the side of the leg it was burrowed in and ripping it open in consequence. One more collapsed bandit to add as I flicked clinging blood off onto the cobblestone and released the now useless baton to the road. They could’ve run, but they figured each of themselves would be that one to end this fight with their weapon.   
  
“First Fire!” The robed man called out and a bundle of flames exploded from his extended hand that was hidden behind his compatriot. Dodge left, cast illusion magic and I was gone in the flash of fire that broke down into my centerpiece stance.    
  
“Did you get her, Feimon?” One spoke cautiously before I stepped deftly up to the bandit closest to the mage and impaled his belly on my blade, drawing it from his side to spill his innards and stepping around him to dash forward into the mage as he casted up a weak barrier. It hardly stopped my sword from meeting the flesh of his collar. Crunching into the torso and killing the mage, the robed figure collapses to his knees and I pull my blade forward and out from the deep wound to slice an arc of blood across the road at the rest of the bandits while they haplessly watched me slice down two more of their number.   
  
“I warned you,” I started with before pointing my blade towards the closest one on my right. I followed that point towards him with my fury filled gaze while the weapon trembled between his two gripping hands.  _ “I promised you.”  _ _  
_ _  
_ I spat in their direction, feeling the cold tear spill down my cheek before I blinked it away. Dash forward and I lobbed this bandit’s head away before his friend could assist, witnessing the lifeless skull fly before my left hand sailed in to smash forward into the windpipe. Choking on his apple before I poked his chest with my sword and ended the disgusting sound.    
  
Maybe I was the one trembling now.    
  
The final bandit failed to run, just collapsed to the ground with a pleading look. The words made no noise to me as he screamed for me to spare his life. I merely knocked him out with a curled fist, red poured from his nose while he limped to the cobblestone… the one of two who lived. Only one of two, everyone else was a pool of red and now rotting flesh. I stepped back to the leader as he slowly awakened from my punch, quite dazed and pale from the lack of blood that flowed freely from his stump arm. I swiped my blade off to my side to free the metal of red speckled decoration before I sheathed it. Grabbing the barely conscious man by the scruff of his neck, hauling his weight up to his knees, drawing in close along his ear.    
  
“Die already.” I muttered, pulling him back and dropping him from my hand. Letting him fall in a heap to die cold and alone by all the men he brought to die before him. I drew to my knees besides the corpse that was once an acquaintance. A man under  _ my  _ protection, I still managed to fail someone and the words of Naofumi rang within my head. Stuff about fear, the fear of not being strong enough. Sometimes I worried about the same things, and now… I was stronger then all who faced me here. Startlingly so, but still this man was dead with a blade in his throat and beaten to a bloodied pulp. 

**\---**   
  
I was never going to be strong enough, I’m still that weak girl…    
  
“I’m sorry…” I hushed out to the calmer expression below me. My left hand moved in and caressed along the top of his scalp and between his cold ears. Right reaching in to grasp on his shoulder and draw him up to my lap. “I didn’t save you…” I whispered out, “We’ll bury you somewhere nice.”    
  
In that horrible image, I saw my parents.   
  
I saw Rifana.

I saw Keel.   
  
I saw Filo.   
  
Then of course…   
  
My lips trembled and I sighed out harshly. Rasping out a stifled voice as everything overcame me in an instant.   
  
_ This is why I became stronger. _

_ And it never even mattered. _

  
Smoke, fire in my lungs, ebbing fear and adrenaline. I was right back there in every terrible thing that has ever happened. Cold like in the cell, crushed like after the cliff. Drowning quietly in the sorrow for long tumbling moments.   
  
“Raphtalia…” Naofumi’s voice sounded out behind me, at my left, I didn't even notice him trot up the road. Lost to the feeling I assume. How much time has passed, does it even matter?   
  
“Don’t let Filo-” I turned around sharply to look at him and he started speaking.    
  
“She’s helping with everyone else… damn, Se’Li?” He paused after he interrupted me, and I nodded. The casually dressed Hero moved closer to me as I held the cold man in my arms. 

  
“Filo’s too young…” I whispered out at him and he nodded in agreement. Filo had seen nasty things… but, I don’t know if she was ready to see someone she knew dead. He took his position beside me and slowly placed his hand on my shoulder. I looked down at the man below me while Naofumi softly squeezed onto me.   
  
“I… We will find a proper site to bury him.”   
  
“I couldn’t save him.”   
  
“You saved the others here.”   
  
“... yeah…” I hushed out, receiving Naofumi’s comforting grip to reassure me. “It’s just like last time.”    
  
“No it isn’t.” He knelt down besides me now, reaching over to gently press my chin up. Bringing my eyes to the sight of the remaining houses still standing as a chilling rain started to dribble down onto our surroundings. A cold breeze cut off the smoke while rainwater smothered the once blazing roof fire. “You saved everyone here. You protected your home.” Everything felt so fast and removed from the person beside me and the person in my hands.    
  
He was right, everything was different now and that was all my doing here.    
  
_ Every time I blink I see their faces. _ _  
_ _  
_ I shut my gaze and turned into the chest of my friend, my partner. His hands came around my head and clutched me gently, letting my wail hide into his torso as I couldn't stifle it for a second more.    
  
Pattering rainwater washing away the red.


End file.
